Forgetting your most painful and traumatic experiences

Philippines
March 1, 2013 5:04am CST
I studied in a Chinese-Filipino school and every school has their own cultural dance. I was 11-years-old when this Chinese teacher suddenly called me to come to her desk and she asked me if I'm interested to join a Chinese dance, I said yes so the start of my time dancing and that's also when everything comes down crashing. I started to notice that the teacher who recruited me started treating me differently. She keeps giving me this disappointing scowl and she doesn't seemed to be happy that I was there. I really don't know, I just have this feeling that she doesn't like me. I did everything she told me without complaint just so I can gained her approval but the more I do something the more disappointed she was. The following school year, I had my hair cut and just because of that I was out of the group this instant. One of my friends from the dance group told me she over heard the teacher said to another teacher to never allow me to join any dances because my body was too stiff. I was depressed, angry and shocked because of that teacher I stopped dancing. I try to over this trauma by joining another dance group Lion and Dragon dance, I thought I finally got over my trauma but the same thing happen. I finally found out why, those 2 teachers doesn't seem to like my mom. She's just an office lady who works in a cashier who just works on the teacher's pay check, that's it. I've been trying to get over this but every time I was asked to join dancing it reminds me of what happen.
6 responses
@allknowing (136562)
• India
2 Mar 13
I can write a book on so many things that have happened to me which I know were unfair. But everyone goes through it. Some tell you and some don't. The fact that we are not alone somehow makes us move on. I suggest you do the same. If you make a martyr of yourself it will harm you more.
@bingskee (5234)
• Philippines
2 Mar 13
it is good to be moving on. after all, i bet you learned a lesson or two from that bad experience. there are always bad eggs even among teachers who are supposed to mold the young, who are supposed to be examples. what does their dislike about your mom something to do with you? it does not really make sense. however, looking at things in a positive way, that is, treating these bad experience with bad people, help you to grow more responsible and deal with other people with compassion in any situation or circumstances that comes along.
@sizzle3000 (3036)
• United States
2 Mar 13
In my opinion we never really get over traumatic and painful experiences. I think that we heal and the event leaves a scar which at times throbs. I think that while we try to forget that it never completely goes away. I know this,I'm watching my daughter go through this.
@TriciaW (2441)
• United States
1 Mar 13
It is hard to get over things like that but know that it has made you stronger because of it. The one thing I suggest is to dance your heart out at home. Learn the dances you wanted to do and prove to yourself that you can do them. In the long run it really doesn't matter what someone else says it is about what you feel in your heart. So keep dancing and perfect what you know. I was never a dancer but I dance around my house all the time. It is actually very fun and that is why you would want to dance in the first place to enjoy yourself. So get on your dancing shoes and dance till your heart is content. These people that put us down only do so because they haven't gotten past their own flaws in life. Make sure in the future you never do that to anyone and you will be a far better person then that teacher ever was!!
@Aja103654 (5646)
• Philippines
2 Mar 13
Get over it. That was years ago. You can always start over and show it to their faces that you are a far better dancer than they thought you were. The only approval you need to dance is yours and not theirs. I wasn't that good a dancer either but I like to imagine their shocked faces when they see how I have improved through the years. It doesn't matter how good you are at dancing just as long as your enjoying it. Don't bother yourself with what others might think, because that will often hold you back from enjoying life. Screw them and their petty opinions.
@Raine38 (12250)
• United States
1 Mar 13
Shame on those 2 teachers. They should be the one to motivate and inspire students, not the other way around. Is it safe for me to assume that that is a private school? Then all the more, they should be ashamed of what they are doing because your parents are the ones paying for their salary. How dare they look down students just because they think their connections are not great enough. My mom is a public school teacher and I see how her students even those who have graduated long ago still treat her with respect because of the way she helped them. I hope they realize that a person's background or position or paycheck doesn't make him or her less of a person than they are.