hi friend after marriage my son want to be separate now, what i do?

I think that he should be really helping out with the expenses in the house since he lives with you. And if you yourself is not earning that much, then that could be really a burden on your part. If he still refuses despite you talking him into it, then I think that you should just allow him to leave the house and go on his own. Let him free so he'll know the value of money.

Ohhh this is really hard to say what should you do? Why your son is not understand his earning is good because you are saying he is Govt. employee then whats the problem to share some earning in home expenses. Even wife is not agree but your son should understand now everything is costly and not possible to manage the house only on one man earning. He should share his contribution you talk with him politely when his wife is not in home.

I don't think his lack of care for the family's expenses has anything to do with his marriage and his wife's unhappiness. However, I have to wonder what has been going on all these years since he started working especially when he should be helping out a bit in some ways like buying the groceries, toiletries, home utilities or television cable. Surely, he could be so blind insensitive to the needs or happenings on the home front. Or, is he? Nothing will work unless all of you sit down to talk as a family and that will include his wife. I am sure you are not being unreasonable where the utilities and living expenses are evidently need to be shared with every grown up. Both of them needs to see that they will still need to pay utilities and living expenses when they move out. If I may add, much more when they will need to get a place of their own - buy/rent it is still money! I cannot believe that they cannot see this and agree that they need to meet you in the middle here. However, if he wants to be stubborn and all against it, then you can always let them go ahead while you plan to rent the room out to get some income for yourself. If it is a big house, then sell it and find a smaller one buy/rent to sustain yourself. I suppose it is time to plan for your old age if (sad to say) your children does not want to involved when you get old.

Here in our country, when son or daughter gets married, they are expected to live on their own. That way, they learn how to be on their own. However, other who marry don't have the capacity to do that because it's either they don't have a job or can't afford to be on their own, so they still live with the parents. Thus, in your case since you said that since he started having a job, he never gave a single cent to share in the house expenses then , you should allow him to be separated from your house. That way, they will learn on how to live on their own.

since your son already married i think he have the right to decide if where he lives with or who will he lives with,and aside from that its more okay when they will be separated from the parents so that they would know how to stand in their own.

He has a job, he is married he should look after household expenses also. He has been working for 6years he should be responsible man now. It would be better if he doesnt stay with you when stays at some other place he would come to know about his responsibilities and also about household expenses.

I live in Western Society where generally marriages are not arranged and the young ouple has a seperate residence away from the parents. Only very rarely do people live with their parents after marriage. So I don't think I could offer you much help. However, I would say if your son and his wife continue to live with you they should share the household expenses, If they are not agreable to do so and want to move out you have to let them go, If you yourself need financial help from your son you have to tell him that it is his obligation to do so. He could send you support money every month even though he does not live in the same house with you. I hope you can resolve this. .

Hi. I'm so sorry about your situation. Are you from Egypt? Because I am quite familiar about their culture though I've never been there actually. I think you need to talk to your son in a very nice way to explain how things are. Its very irresponsible for your son to just get out of your house without sharing anything. If you are in the Philippines, then that could be possible but, in your case, it is NOT ACCEPTABLE. I would suggest that you try to carefully chose how you talk to him or his wife and never start an argument. Things could be settled if all of you will have a calm voice and open heart. I really hope things will turn out good for all of you. it's not good to spend our remaining years on earth hating or getting angry with other people especially our families.

I respect your ways and culture but as far as i know when one is married he need to stand at her own family. Had own property like house and lot and so on. Live separately to his family itself. Now talking about your concern, your problem is your son don't want to share some expenses at home. because his wife doesn't agree. Now try to talk to your son coz he is the husband and he will decide what to do. And to add more, you dont like them to live separate from you.. well you have no right whatever your son has decided to their life. Because they are about to live on their own. Try to accept what he will tell for the expense of his family.. Don't worry my friend everything will be alright...

It might be good for them because they too want to have a family. But this is good for you too and your son. The bad things about it was the you left alone in your home. This is not good if your alone to live and this is responsible of your son to care for you. His wife want to have a private life due to some extent. Because as we know in laws relationship not good enough. This might his wife need to avoid something...

You do have the right ask for money if he still lives with you, but mind you, you can't actually demand that much since he also wants to save on his own if he chooses. Now that he is married and wants to move out, you can't do much of it either since he is now obligated with his wife and also you can't force and grown man to still live you. Also he is married, maybe he wants to start fresh, so let him be.

First of all this is not of your business but something between your son and his wife. I think a man should be able to take care of his wife/family before he get's married. I don't know if I understand your question right but it sounds to me he wants to keep his income for him alone. If this is the case I think it's the best he will divorce. Why? Because he will never do so, Always be selfish and his wife will have a terrible life with him.

I think that many of the pre-arranged marriages end up in divorce. If there are a few that survived, good for them maybe they ended up falling in love in the end or they fell truly in love with the product of their marriage that is their children. Your son should grow up and start learning to be sensible and responsible. He should realize that we could only have one set of parents and that we should always honor our parents by many ways and one is by helping them with expenses. For many years, your son, though working, didn't help you out. Then, he should start making a life of his own now.

if he still live with you, he might be help you for the expences. but if he want to live his life on thier own, let them be. You can also help him to guide what the best for his family.

Sometimes there are times when you have to be straight forward to your children or family. Because they are not the kind's who will understand it by themselves that it is their duty to support their family members. So what i think you can possibly do is. Tell your son directly, that you have been there supporting him all those times when he was not able to stand, walk, study or gain confidence. And now you also need the same support from him, tell him that you now need his company and support. Tell him that you need some support to run the family too. I am sure that way it will create an obstacle to him. Well you cannot stop him from staying apart, because before his wife his mind won't work this happens.

If he lives with you in your house, then he should help with the home expenses. If he does not want to do it, he must make a house for himself and move out. But what I say is fronm my point of view and my culture is not as yours. In my country there is no such thing as an arranged marriage and if one of my children worked during 6 years and lived with me, I would surely ask of them for a reasonable amount of money.

Maybe its better for you to let your son have their own life, atleast maybe when they get thier own place he will realize the responsibilities he actually have to do that maybe you have been doing for him. and arrange marriage? remember that you picked his wife and now her wife doesnt want to share expenses in the house?well I guess you made the wrong choice. and now they want to get their own place now? let it be. Besides your the one who arrange the marriage so you have no choice but to face the consequences.sorry for being to straight.. I hope everything will work out soon.God bless

He should help with the expences if he lives with you. If he wants to live on his own you should let him. He is a man after all, isn't he. It's normal that he wants to start a new family. The new couple needs some space. He is not your little boy anymore.

If he wants to live separate life , it is better you allow him to live that way,or there will be problems created and there will be no peace of mind, and your relation with your son will get worsened. I feel he will realize his mistake of living separately and will definitely come and stay with you some day, till that be patient.