I miss having babies..
By katsmeow1213
@katsmeow1213 (28716)
United States
March 8, 2013 8:37am CST
A few years ago a friend of mine with 4 kids had a partial hysterectomy, and mentioned how she felt depressed that she could no longer choose to have children. Although she didn't actually want anymore.. she just didn't like not having the choice.
I didn't understand how she could feel that way. After having 5 kids of my own, and wishing I could have a hysterectomy to make me stop.. I felt she was blessed to know for certain she couldn't have anymore.
But now I get it.
Two years after my youngest was born I ended up having an ectopic pregnancy and needed my tubes removed. Since then I've been incapable of getting pregnant again. Honestly, it's a blessing. No form of birth control ever worked for me. Only 1 of my pregnancies were planned.. and that's the one that resulted in twins!
Logically speaking, I really don't want anymore kids. 5 is plenty. They're finally at an age where they don't need constant attention.. I can begin to start having my own life again since they're all in school and the older ones are at an age where they can babysit since the younger ones don't require a lot of care anymore. Not to mention I can't afford anymore kids, and don't have the space for anymore kids.. and anytime I think about how nice having another baby would be I think about where would I put it and I can't possibly have it upstairs since I'm already neurotic about these darn stairs and don't let the 5 and 6 year olds go up or down them (because even the 15 year old falls down them at least once a week.. only because he's not careful and I yell at him to be more careful each time.. one of these days I'm going to have a heart attack!).
But there's a part of me that misses having little babies around and how cute and adorable they are. Sometimes, although rare, I do wish I had the OPTION to try for another. Of course, like I said, I'm glad I can't..
Sounds weird, right? I shouldn't be wanting more kids.. but there's a part of me that does. Guess I'll just have to wait for the grandbabies!
Have you ever wished you could have another.. even if you really don't want anymore?
7 people like this
25 responses
@kaka135 (14931)
• Malaysia
9 Mar 13
I think it's just really nice and warm holding a baby, and even taking care of a baby. Babies are so adorable and lovely. I have not really face this, as I only have two kids now, and I want to have one or two kids perhaps one year later. But I had c-section (forced to do so) for both of my kids, and I was told that I can only have maximum 4 kids. Though I plan to have 3 or 4 kids only, knowing that I can only have 4 makes me a bit sad. I just think maybe I'd want to have another kid, but I can't anymore.
My youngest is 8 months old now, and I can understand how lovely to hold a baby. Of course, I love my 4 year old son too, he is very sweet and lovely, but babies are just different, though more time and attention needed. Babies are really like little angels. 
1 person likes this
@writergirl74 (802)
• United States
9 Mar 13
I guess I would say be careful what you wish for. I can still have children and I knew I wanted more, but there were circumstanced under which I wanted to have them and this isn't the case. I say that because I am not pregnant with twins. While my the person I was having physical relations with at the time knew I could get pregnant he decided to be angry when we found out I was pregnant and was even further angry when we learned it was twins. So, there are parts of me that wish I could take this pregnancy back cause it has put me in a hard way, but all in all I know children are a blessing and I will feel much better after I deliver...I think!
@katsmeow1213 (28716)
• United States
9 Mar 13
I figured that out by the end.. lol.
My twins are 10 years old now. Thankfully my husband was there to help me with them. It's not easy caring for twins. Who do you have to help you if the father isn't around anymore?
@writergirl74 (802)
• United States
9 Mar 13
I meant to say I am now pregnant with twins...those darn typos...smh
@AmbiePam (93739)
• United States
9 Mar 13
I get my love of babies satisfied by having my sister have children. She just adopted and I'm satisfied getting to coo over Amyra. I really wish I saw her more often. But I'm good with not having any of my own. I can barely stand the noise of the fridge when I have a migraine. I can't imagine having a sweet, but unassumingly loud child running around.
True that kats, kids are NEVER quiet!!
@katsmeow1213 (28716)
• United States
9 Mar 13
Yeah.. their noise drives me crazy even without a headache. I always wonder how they came up with that saying "Children should be seen and not heard". It's impossible to get a child to be quiet!
@katsmeow1213 (28716)
• United States
9 Mar 13
Yeah.. I'm not really in a hurry. I want to be sure I'm not raising my grandkids.
@katsmeow1213 (28716)
• United States
9 Mar 13
I think that's my problem.. I don't have anything on my plate right now. While that's a good thing, mentally I need something going on. I don't want to work right now.. I don't want to go back to school.. so I guess another baby is what my mind settled on.. but it's not going to happen.
@arpazia (191)
• United States
9 Mar 13
AW:(
baby fever is evil!
have you thought about babysitting infants, a little reminder of the bad...and good of course!
I Know what you are talking about. One minute im all wanting one and thinking im pregnant and then Im like...oh no never mind, don't want another kid!
our son will be 8 in april and I think its a good time for another
@katsmeow1213 (28716)
• United States
9 Mar 13
Nope, I don't want to babysit somebody else's kid.. it's not the same.
@4mymak (1793)
• Malaysia
14 Mar 13
i think i can relate / understand what you are feeling...
i have 5 children - aged 9 - 19.. so my youngest is not a baby anymore..
it is really a MIXED feeling.. i know i am fit enough to carry another pregnancy.. go through labor + delivery and all that..
and i think we CAN afford to have another child..
BUT... i am 'enjoying' the 'freedom' i have right now..
BUT... i do miss holding, cuddling and going gooo-goo-gaa-gaaa at a baby..
BUT... i dont want to get during the night to change diapers or feed the baby...
BUT... i do miss waiting for them to have the 1st.step, 1st.words..
BUT... BUT.. BUT... .... .... 
@3SnuggleBunnies (16374)
• United States
8 Mar 13
Sounds like you've got baby fever! It's such a special time in your life but at the tsame time like you said when your kids are now more independant and potty trained who want's to go back? Not me! Grandkids in 15yrs and hopefully not too much sooner either!
@katsmeow1213 (28716)
• United States
8 Mar 13
Doesn't help that nobody close to me is having babies. I'll never be an autie.. or a godmother, or anything like that.
@dawnald (85146)
• Shingle Springs, California
12 Mar 13
Yeah, but it's more like wishing I could have one with who I'm with, as opposed to actually wanting a baby.
@bellis716 (4799)
• United States
11 Mar 13
Hold that thought. You'll have grandchildren soon enough, hopefully not too soon.
@4ofmyown (1119)
• United States
8 Mar 13
I can completely understand where you are coming from. I have 7 kids...my oldest 4 are from my first marriage. I am re-married and we have 3 girls ages: 3 1/2, 22 months and 11 months. Needless to say I am VERY busy all day long...it is awesome and exhausting! My oldest started high school and my youngest is just learning to walk! As the baby pass each milestone I have caught myself thinking " this is my last baby to do this". My husband had a vasectomy so no more babies for us. I am a little sad at times but I think that is just the normal maternal feeling that some women feel.
@katsmeow1213 (28716)
• United States
8 Mar 13
I thought that with each of my last 2.. that it was going to be the last baby. I made sure to enjoy every minute of it.. though I still miss it.
@dorannmwin (36392)
• United States
9 Mar 13
No, it doesn't sound weird to me at all. I guess the reason that it doesn't sound weird to me is because of the fact that I elected to have a tubal ligation after Paul was born. Now that he is getting older and doesn't need me as much as he used to, I would love to be able to have another baby.
I know that I couldn't afford another baby and there really isn't a lot of space that we could have another person in our house, but there are just times that I guess my biological clock kicks in for me and I wish that I could have just one more baby.
@bluespygirl (2112)
• Philippines
9 Mar 13
There is a part of me that wants to have babies too. It is just that maybe I miss having a baby. I have three kids and my youngest is already ten years old. Given stable income, I would prefer to have five kids. But because of the economy and high price of commodity, our income isnt enough even now.
@jadoixa (1166)
• Philippines
9 Mar 13
yes, i feel that too. my daughter is almost 5 and sometimes when i see new babies being born or babies around, i miss those times when she was small..i wish i have a new baby too although sometimes i think how hard it is to care for or the responsibilities that goes along with it..i miss having an adorable and cute baby ..it feels that way when our children are all grown up.
@PurpleTeddyBear (6685)
• Canada
9 Mar 13
I totally get it! I had my first child in 2006, and my 2nd came in 2009. Then I decided that I couldn't afford anymore kids, plus I was getting up their in age so I had my tubes tied. BUT every now and then I sooooo wish that I could have just one more, or at least have the choice to have one more!
@salonga (27775)
• Philippines
9 Mar 13
Having babies is a blessing! After all, children are heritage from God. I only have one but would have wanted for more but God did not grant that desire of mine. Nevertheless I am happy for though I wished for more, my one is more than enough because he has all that I could ask for.
On the other hand, I understand those who have more than one but would want more. Motherhood is a blessed stage. It is one of the most wonderful things a woman could ever be. Who would not love a newborn in the family? Infants are the cutest things in this world. So if you are capable physically, financially and emotionally then go and do it by all means. More child, more delight.
But what if God in his perfect plan, took away your ability to bear another child? Sad it is not? I understand the feeling that there is somehow, there is something missing in you. Well only a woman like us would understand what is that feeling really is. But let us all be reminded that God knows what is best for each of us.
On the other hand, I understand those who have more than one but would want more. Motherhood is a blessed stage. It is one of the most wonderful things a woman could ever be. Who would not love a newborn in the family? Infants are the cutest things in this world. So if you are capable physically, financially and emotionally then go and do it by all means. More child, more delight.
But what if God in his perfect plan, took away your ability to bear another child? Sad it is not? I understand the feeling that there is somehow, there is something missing in you. Well only a woman like us would understand what is that feeling really is. But let us all be reminded that God knows what is best for each of us.
@cynthiann (18602)
• Jamaica
9 Mar 13
I love the way they smell and the way they cuddle into your neck and make those sighing noises. I loved the way they smile and then when they recognise me. I loved a little baby. If I hadn't had 5 late miscarriages then I would have had nine. Or maybe I would have stopped after five or six. I don't know. I love my children with a passion and also my grands. Have two in the bed beside me right now reading whilst I am typing. I know that I will not have them forever so, despite the problems that still exist, I do enjoy them. My last child was when I was 39 so I did not miss having anymore children. But would have liked to borrow one for a day or so.
@sender621 (14894)
• United States
9 Mar 13
I think that when the choice is taken away from a woman in conceiving a child it changes her views in her life somewhat. Some women know for sure if they want to have any more children or not. Other are left uncertain. I cannot have anymore children myself. I am blessed with two and they are nearly grown up and on their own. There have been times when I wish that I could have another child but the best compensation for not having them is to enjoy the children of family members.
@jenny1015 (13366)
• Philippines
9 Mar 13
I am fond of babies even when I was a kid. I just love playing with them and taking care of them, But after having 4 kids, I think that it is more than enough. It;s not that I would really not want to have a kid, it's just not that easy to raise one more coz of the difficulties in life. I have had tubal ligation after my 4th child. I was really determined to stop at 4. My husband wished I could still bear a child hoping that it would be a daughter next time since we already have 4 sons. But I don't think it is practical to have lots of kids with how hard it is to make both ends meet.
If I ever wanted to have a child crossed my mind? No. I'd just rather help take care kids of my sister in law and I am fine with that.
@Alisatan (190)
• Hefei, China
9 Mar 13
I love baby very much. I am 28 years old and marriage last year. But it is not the right time for pregnancy now, maybe next year? I don't know. I am just thinking to have a better life first, then my little child can have better life and education. But my age grows, so it is frustrating...by the way, will it be very pain for giving bitrh?
