fearlessgara's hidden secrets and karma

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Even my parents don't know what kind of characters I am. I have the negative and positive characters. Negative one is being insecure and always seek revenge for someone who betrayed me and do something bad against me despite of all the kindness I made to them. and my positive attitude once I done the revenge. I feel so guilty and my anger easily gone after that and I remember the karma I will received from dong such things. Sometimes I am thinking of big revenge but my fear on God controls me. and I easily do repent. the another positive one is that I always find a job coming from good things and I don't use people just to earn money.I don't steal and always keep a a good employee to the family because I know God is always watching me.It's only my anger towards others makes me a little while forget that there is God who is giving karma good or bad to what we done. And yes it is true whenever i follow my anger I always experienced bad karma I don't remember anything that I have done bad that didn't bounce back to me.and I only realize that when that things happen to me. Good karma I also receive every time I done good things. My life wasn't stable till now because of all anger in my heart I keep on years. instead of focusing with my future I always think of what evilness people around me is continue doing to me. Now one thing I learn at my 30+ year of my life and what is in the bible the God's teaching.Never revenge. Do good things to those who do bad things upon you because it is God who will please and give you reward for following His commandments and God will judge and punish them on the right time which is judgment day.If we love God we will follow all his commandments. that is what always remind in my mind. and now I am start to change myself for good.Not to frevenge or always fight or argue to someone who have done bad things to me easily but instead continue to done them good and controlling my temper as much as i can and put everything unto God