I love my Mylot family like my own
@PointlessQuestions (15397)
United States
March 30, 2013 10:15pm CST
It's true! I love my Mylot family. Many of you are like brothers and sisters and even daughters to me. I get wrapped up in some of your lives. I lose sleep over some of you when I know what you are going through. U want to make it better. In a healer, meaning that I use my nurse mentality to try and help people who ask for help, prayers or whatever.
Those of you who really know me know that I am not trying to be mean. You also know I will be direct and honest with my responses. Sometimes I might sound like in annoyed. In truth, I probably am because I am so emotionally involved with you.
I don't want to hurt anyone. I don't know how NOT to be ME. Take me or leave me. I can't be fake. If I ever hurt your feelings, it wasn't intentional. It's not in my nature to purposely set out to hurt people. If you are my REAL friend you know that. You also know I go through much of what you do, or I have gone through it.
You had a bad marriage? I did too.
You were molested? I was too.
You suffered spousal abuse? Me too.
I've been there and I am a survivor. I draw from my own experience to try and help others when I can.
I may not be able to help some folks. If you are like me...I'm not always looking for help, but I'm just getting stuff off my chest.
Anyway, I said all the above to say if you are my real friend, then you know you are like family to me.
Your thoughts?
4 people like this
15 responses
@donatello123 (326)
• Philippines
31 Mar 13
Although I still consider myself as a new member of MyLot but for the two months that I've been here, I realized that the responses and advice that most of Mylotters are giving are so helpful to me. Before I just signed up for myLot for the purpose of earning but now earning is just secondary for me. I love MyLot because it helps me to become my real self. I treat everyone here as my friend and as a family.
2 people like this
@PointlessQuestions (15397)
• United States
31 Mar 13
Welcome! Yes we are like family. Sometimes we squabble, but what family doesn't? Earning is great, but the bonds we form are much greater.
@sid556 (30960)
• United States
31 Mar 13
I think we are a lot alike. I have been through many of the same things as you...most of them anyway. When I respond to discussions of someone going through a tough time and one similar to mine it is because Ive been there and come out on the other side. Whenever I mention my past, like you, it is not that i am looking for answers or sympathy but more to let the other person know that I do understand and can relate. That being said, I don't think you come across as harsh or mean. You speak your mind and that is what we all want or most of us do anyway.
1 person likes this
@sid556 (30960)
• United States
31 Mar 13
Really? I didn't see a thing offensive about that discussion at all. In fact, I thought it was a very good discussion. If I recall, initially, I misunderstood a couple of statements but we talked and you clarified...I honestly did not see anything in that discussion that would hurt or offend anyone. I'll have to go back and re-read.
@PointlessQuestions (15397)
• United States
31 Mar 13
Well, apparently I offended someone here who us on my friends list. I consider her a friend even though we don't message or email. I respect her greatly, but apparently my candor was not appreciated. It was a discussion I made about we create much of our own misery and some of us stay in it rather than making some changes to make life better. It was taken personal by a few and offended one person. It wasn't meant to offend. But I guess we all have a right to be offended if we want to. It's not my intention to offend, but if it happens all I can do is let it go. I can't let it ruin my day.
@wolfie34 (26771)
• United Kingdom
31 Mar 13
It's wonderful to have people like you, willing to listen to others, advise and support and show empathy. I see Mylot as my therapy group! I have a lot of wonderful friends here who give unconditional support, show care, warmth and are so genuine and know the exact words to say. I was abused twice as a child, I have been bullied throughout my school life and have been in not one but two abusive relationships, I too am a survivor, although I suffer with depression, acute anxiety and social phobia, I see Mylot as my connection to the outside world, a place where I can be me. So yeah, it is rather like a family. I don't have friends offline, only online and only here.
1 person likes this
@wolfie34 (26771)
• United Kingdom
1 Apr 13
Cookie? OMG. Yes of course! I shall call you my big sis now! My parents never abused me, not physically, but my father did and still does mentally, although not as much as the way he treats my mum. I was abused sexually once by a woman and once by a so called male friend. I have learn to accept what happened, I was only 6 at the time. Without going too much into it, it's been a constant fight throughout my life, only now with the aid of an excellent therapist, antidepressants that seem to work and of course my wonderful friends at Mylot can I face each day.
@PointlessQuestions (15397)
• United States
1 Apr 13
You are so much like me Wolfie. I was abused too. My parents loved me but they had lots of dysfunction because they were abused. Dad just was very heavy handed and he would kick and throw me and my brother in a fit of rage. He couldn't help himself. There were triggers that would set him off. I learned to judge his temperament by his body language. I learned when he would possibly blow a fuse.
I loved my dad though. I didn't like him much sometimes but I loved him. He mellowed out a lot when he found religion. He finally had a Daddy (God) who loved him unconditionally. I understood my parents' being abusive was the cycle they were in.
I have talked about it here. You all have been here for me. Mylot is my outlet too. I don't see any of my friends. They are too far away.
I think of you like a younger brother. You were my friend when I was Oreo.
1 person likes this
@mentalward (14690)
• United States
31 Mar 13
I feel the same way, PQ. This is my family here. Well, there are many, MANY very distant relatives here who don't know me and I don't know them but those I do know well are like family.
I would never intentionally hurt anyone, ever. Well, that is unless it was self-defense but that doesn't happen very often. Hmmm, actually, it has never happened! I had trouble with one myLotter who apparently didn't like one of my responses to her "plea for help" (she was one of those drama queens who only wanted sympathy, never the advice she actually asked for and often made conflicting statements in different discussions). I tried to calm her down and, when she refused to calm down, I began to ignore her. She began stalking me and adding nasty comments, including the fact that she was going to get me banned. I just notified admin and, after they told me they'd keep an eye on the situation and take appropriate action, they banned her forever.
But, nope, I'd never hurt anyone, not physically, not verbally. I don't play games. I'm a "wizziwig" which is really spelled WYSIWYG, meaning What You See Is What You Get.
I might disappear from here for days but I always come back. I don't always respond to everything but I do love keeping up with what my "family" is doing and how they're doing.
Hugs, sis! 
@PointlessQuestions (15397)
• United States
1 Apr 13
I'm so happy we are sisters! I have another one now! I have Winterose, Stephcjh, RitterSport, and I used to have another one but I guess we are much more strained than before. I still live her a lot and I think she does me to an extent. She is the Mom to my kitty that I couldn't keep. I'll always cherish her for that. I just couldn't put myself between two friends that weren't getting along and it caused me to lose her, I guess. We got into a fight and I lost my temper. I'm not nice when I get real mad, and I regret losing her. But I love my other friend too and that seemed to be a bone of contention. Oh well, that's water under the bridge v, @courtknee525 (3742)
• United States
1 Apr 13
Awww this is so nice :) Whenever I have an issue or stressful moment, there are a few people on myLot who I always would like to hear from no matter what. The past year has been tough with my boyfriend leaving for the army and then for Korea and you've always been there to offer encouraging words or to try and make me feel better. Reading your comments make me feel a lot better and you sometimes put things back in perspective for me. And it's always nice to hear from someone who can make me feel better during a rough time. Thank you for always being there!
1 person likes this
@PointlessQuestions (15397)
• United States
1 Apr 13
Thank you Court. I feel almost like you could be a granddaughter. I feel very close to you. I know you hurt so much when your boyfriend had to go to Korea. I understood your grief and distress. I also understood this is his job and he is doing a noble thing by serving. To me he is a hero. When I see military men, I always ask if I can shake their hand. Even if they haven't been on foreign soil I still say they are our heroes. They offer up their lives and even sometimes give the ultimate sacrifice. I am so proud of your boyfriend and others like him who defend and protect our constitution. 
@LovingMyBabies (85288)
• Valdosta, Georgia
31 Mar 13
I feel the same way you do. So many people here are like family to me. I have gotten so close to my friends here and I cherish them so much. If they are hurting I feel hurt as well. You and I get emotionally involved most of the time, I know. I also like to help others and speak from my experience. I hate not being able to help when I just can't. I wish that I could help everyone here that needs it. I wish I could make everyone's lives better. :) I know that is not possible but I can still wish for it!
I do the same thing, sometimes I come here to vent but I also like getting other's opinions on things too. I spend most of my time with children so this is the only adult interaction I get, being here. I am so glad I have MyLot and I have amazing family here! :)
Your friends here know you are a true friend PQ. No need to explain yourself, well at least not to me.
1 person likes this
@PointlessQuestions (15397)
• United States
31 Mar 13
You are very special to me LMB. I admire you so much for all you have come through and all you have accomplished. If I could have had someone like you in my life 45 years ago I might still be married to my daughter's father. Maybe then my daughter wouldn't have the problems she has. She has reunited with her dad. He stayed out if her life for 40 years. It's been an uphill battle but she is finding live in her heart for him. In glad. I wish we could have been as grown up as you have been and kept our family together.
My daughter's father sees me as the enemy. He will probably do the happy dance when I die. He doesn't even know I still love him cuz he was my first and my daughter's father. I wish I were more like you. 
1 person likes this
@LovingMyBabies (85288)
• Valdosta, Georgia
31 Mar 13
Thank you PQ! I don't feel like I am that strong of a person, but others tell me I am stronger than I realize with the things I have been through... I just see it as I pushed through because I had no other choice in the matter. And my faith has gotten me through so many horrible times in my life. I try to be a good mother, a good wife and a good person all around. It is tough keeping a family together but it is worth it. Life has not been an easy ride for me or my family but our love is so strong, that is what keeps us going. Even when we have no money and our bills are all behind we still know we are far richer than some people with the love we have for each other.
I think your a great person PQ, and I wish your situation was a better one. Unfortunately, I cannot change it. I wish I could.
I don't feel like I am that strong of a person, but others tell me I am stronger than I realize with the things I have been through... I just see it as I pushed through because I had no other choice in the matter. And my faith has gotten me through so many horrible times in my life. I try to be a good mother, a good wife and a good person all around. It is tough keeping a family together but it is worth it. Life has not been an easy ride for me or my family but our love is so strong, that is what keeps us going. Even when we have no money and our bills are all behind we still know we are far richer than some people with the love we have for each other.
I think your a great person PQ, and I wish your situation was a better one. Unfortunately, I cannot change it. I wish I could.
1 person likes this
@PointlessQuestions (15397)
• United States
1 Apr 13
My situation changes hon. Sometimes I get so stressed and cry, but then it can be so good for awhile. I'm speaking up more now. I don't get into a shouting match. I just leave and when he brings it up to apologize to me I tell him how he makes me feel unsafe. I know I'm safe but I tend to hide like when I was a child. My room is my safe place.
@winterose (39887)
• Canada
2 Apr 13
yeah what brought all this on? I used to care if people liked me, I am an upfront person and some people expect to be handled with kid gloves, not me not my style, those that understand and stick with me I am happy and they also know that I am a great friend. Those that don't well that is there loss. It doesn't hurt me, only them.
@MoonGypsy (4606)
• United States
31 Mar 13
i think that this is a beautiful post. we love you, too pointless. we are just as much here for you as you are for us.
1 person likes this
@PointlessQuestions (15397)
• United States
1 Apr 13
Thank you MG, and I feel that love coming back to me too. People not familiar with Mylit don't understand how we can get so close without actually knowing the person behind the avatar.
@savak03 (6684)
• United States
2 Apr 13
I am actually fonder of my friends here on mylot than I am of my family. The reason behind that is my family always has their hand out. They know exactly when my check comes in and when I get my food stamps. Nevermind that I don't even get enough to take care of myself they always want me to give them some of it. It is so much nicer to talk to people who I know are not going to ask me for my last dollar.
@randylovesdar (4932)
• United States
31 Mar 13
I feel the same way. I think the reason why we all get along with each other is because we do help each other out and try to give each other advice. I think we can all relate to each other to some extent. I know whenever I am upset I come on here and get my feelings out which is great because it allows me take the time to write my feelings out.
1 person likes this
@PointlessQuestions (15397)
• United States
1 Apr 13
That's me too. It helps so much to talk about things. I wonder if the makers of Mylot knew it would be the therapeutic place that it is. It's like therapy to me.
@RitterSport (2451)
• Lippstadt, Germany
6 Apr 13
Hi dear Sis, hugs to you. I know you are sincere and you would not ever hurt anyone on purpose. Everyone has to make his or her own decisions but its helpful to hear what others have to say or suggest, even if I cant always put these things to work other suggest. Like looking for external help in marriage counseling. How should I do that when I commute till 9 pm or later and when most of these places dont work Saturday......
@echoforever (5180)
• United States
2 Apr 13
Its easy to feel this way about the people I've met in myLot. I start to wonder where they are if I don't see them often . I worry about them and when I read some discussions wish I could help more than a few words on a screen. We have many supportors in our myLot community who are easy to get to know.
@scubapro (1051)
• Gifu, Japan
31 Mar 13
i am not suprised to this,because i can see how warm heart you have from your face.;)
i think loving people is not easy,if you know how to love,
we dont need to accept people s charachters but we need to show respect to them,and we need to communicate in a kind way.
i love mylot too,thats why i came here after a long time
happy mylotting
1 person likes this
@PointlessQuestions (15397)
• United States
31 Mar 13
Yes respect is very important. We may not always agree here, but we should always be kind and show compassion and respect.
Thank you for being so kind. You are fast becoming a good friend to me. I think sometimes my irritation shows and people might get offended. I don't set out to offend anyone, but it happens sometimes. I lose friends this way when they really don't get to know me on a more personal level.
@emily7339 (1337)
• Malaysia
31 Mar 13
I want to thank you for being my friend. Looking at your age, I believe I can be your younger sister, haha.
It is good to be honest and helpful. Experience is the best teacher I would say.
I am happy to be a part of this big mylot community and I believe I will learn to love it much some day when I get to know her better....
1 person likes this
@PointlessQuestions (15397)
• United States
1 Apr 13
It's good to see you Emily. I love that name. Consider yourself my sister then. Hope to get to know you better. I get to know people through their posts. So I hope to be reading about you and yours.
@artemeis (4194)
• China
1 Apr 13
Likewise, I am happy to find a friend in you and honored to be considered as one to you.
I fully agree what you have posted and like you I have found quite a number of good friends and sisters even. I hope that our friendship will be a lasting one here.
