Benefits to Parenthood

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Warning: Long post! I was asked a strange question today from a woman at the family center who is considering having children. The question probably isn't that strange but she asked me "What exactly are the benefits to parenthood?" and she clarified by saying 'actual benefits' as opposed to random moments of joy, frustration, etc. I couldn't answer her after her clarification and I feel upset about it. She was looking for the benefits to being a mother, raising children in this day and age, and so on and I couldn't give her at least one true benefit in what she was asking. Before anyone thinks I don't enjoy having my children, I really do, but she did make me think about it. I experienced joy when I was able to hold my children for the first time but... Due to pregnancy, I was in and out of the hospital and had really high hospital bills because of it. I could barely carry my first child and nearly lost my life and more with the second one. I can no longer have any kids. I went from healthy to unhealthy no matter how much I eat right or exercise or do mind-calming things like meditation or yoga. Stress adds to declining health and having children adds to stress because as a parent you are constantly worried about them. I couldn't tell her that the random moments of fun and joy were great benefits because my health is still affected by the stress and problems I still have after having children. I couldn't tell her to save up money or be more financially secure and things will be easier because they wont. My first savings (not the current one I've been able to work on) was completely gone because since I couldn't hold my children as much I had many many doctor's appointments to pay co-pays for on their insurance on top of that both my kids have a minor but potentially bad genetic disorder from me that takes away their ability to turn sugar into energy or process it at all. No one plans on having a premature baby, having a complicated pregnancy, etc. I could've had a great job as well as my husband having one but it wouldn't have mattered when medical bills came up like uncovered medications, hospital stays, etc. Most insurances don't cover multiple events in a year or multiple medical procedures. I couldn't tell her that they give anything back to her because they don't and they might not ever. Every parent can hope that when their children are grown, they will be appreciative of everything they did and so on but they will also develop their own thoughts about things. Even though we raise them with values and more, they will still develop their own opinions and whether or not they apply what they are taught is up to them. With all the craziness in the world - overpopulation, murder, hoping to be safe at work, school, home, etc. but not having it guaranteed anywhere obviously, foods and medicine things that should help them causing more problems - it almost seems selfish to bring children into the world. While I love my children, I can't think of a benefit to having them. I contributed to the overpopulation, my health is all but destroyed no matter how many different things I try to fix the problem. My mental health is effected by childhood traumas and ridiculous amounts of stress added to by constant worrying of my children. My entire savings was gone because I never fully planned on having children (though I wanted them) let alone having children early (premature) or with so many problems. I am paying nearly $200 (give or take a bit) for speech therapy sessions because my youngest son has major speech problems and I have to take him to a specialist in case he needs surgery which it isn't fully covered but I will work on that. It just seems pointless after talking with her. All I can do is raise them, hope they remember the values they were taught at home so they don't get in trouble, hope if they move away they still come visit or I get a mother's day or birthday card once a year. I might have grandchildren one day, but it would be no different than having children other than they go back home at the end of the day. I don't know. What do you think of her question? Do you think there are any actual benefits to having children? Do you think parents speak of being happy or having fun cute moments with their children to make themselves feel better because that is all they truly get out of it? She told me based on the fact that no parent can truly give a good reason for it. That having children is a long-term investment with little to no reward. You carry a child for nine months or less, spend countless hours, amounts of money, lose sleep, end up stressed, and much more all for a child and you have to hope that they don't completely go on with their lives and leave you alone when they grow up.