sister act
By cherigucchi
@cherigucchi (14876)
Philippines
April 18, 2013 1:02am CST
I have an older sister who lives more than a year with me and my family since she came back from working abroad after 21 years. with all those years she spent abroad we only had 5 years of communication with her and nothing was ever heard from her since then. We thought all the while that she's gone or just fully decided to live on her own leaving her children and the whole family for good. Her kids grew up with no mother on their side and their lives were very tough since then. Her husband found comfort from another woman and I don't blame him. Her son was hooked into drugs and now incarcerated because of his drugs involvement. Her eldest child had many broken relationships. She has 5 children in all with different lives now. Lucky for her other son whom I took when he was a baby and treated him like my own. She just could not fully understand how things changed since she left. She is still the same arrogant, proud person I ever known. But she is also soft at times.
To cut the long story short, her children especially the girls felt bad about her and decided to forget about their mom because of some differences. We have so many siblings but she finds comfort living with us. She tried to live with my other two sisters but they quarreled for some reasons and now there's only me whom she can rely on.
Living with her is really tough because she often meddles with the way I treat and discipline my kids. I am the second to the youngest brood of 10 while she is the 3rd child. Imagine the age gap! I cannot wait for her to go back abroad so I can live my life in peace once again. She helps around the house without asking for monetary exchange but that is beside the point. She is also fond of gossiping and making stories with the people around the neighborhood. Actually I pity her but there are times that she is getting into my nerves. I know that I have full responsibility of her now because I consider myself as her only family.
4 responses
@dagami (1158)
• Rome, Italy
18 Apr 13
i don't agree that you have full responsibility of her. she is older than you and she can very well fend for herself. i'm glad you have an understanding husband who puts up with her presence, considering that she meddles in your ways of imposing discipline on your kids.
i cannot blame her husband and kids for living their lives without her. she was able to forget them for 16 years and it is natural that they will harbor ill feelings towards her.
if she really bothers you with her meddling, talk with her and tell her frankly about how you feel. maybe she acts this way because she thinks it's ok with you.
@dagami (1158)
• Rome, Italy
18 Apr 13
you are a generous person. very few sisters would do the things you're doing for her. i don't know your sister's story but i pressumed that after years of working abroad, she must have been able to save something for her retirement. however, if she is also financially dependent on you, then i really hope she appreciates this. you're one of a kind.
@jaiho2009 (39141)
• Philippines
18 Apr 13
This is one strong proof that family is still a family.
I wonder why there are mothers who can live their lives and set their children aside.
I am a mother of three young teenagers and until now I can say that I can't moved or find a life of my own (I have been separated for almost 7 years now).
but it never came to my mind to find or enter another relationship)
I've devoted myself taking care of my kids and working at the same time.
I cannot understand why your sister act as if she's a single person without any obligation.
Sorry- but I couldn't just understand what kind of woman are those who gave birth and call their selves "mother" -I don't think they don't deserve such honor.
And I cannot blame your nieces, nephews (your sister's kids) for having such a life.
And if they reject their mom- it's somehow justifiable.
Well, you know better and you can tell better why your sister messed her life.
Just hope and pray that someday she will come to realize her mistakes.
@cherigucchi (14876)
• Philippines
18 Apr 13
You are damn, right! I share the same views. I understand where you coming from because I am also a mother of three. She is supposed to be making up for the lost time but instead she even blamed her children for abandoning her right now. It is just a very long complicated story that i wish to share for others to understand however, i could only share a portion of it. I am very close to all her children but because she lives with me now, our relationship suffers. We do not have communication anymore. i am really like in a dilemma because she is my sister and I love her very dearly. I am just hoping that someday soon, they will find reconciliation in their hearts.
1 person likes this
@jaiho2009 (39141)
• Philippines
18 Apr 13
Everything is beyond control, unless your sister realizes her mistake.
I understand your situation- as if you are being torn in two.
It's not really easy- I wish everything will be fine- the soonest possible time
@SIMPLYD (90721)
• Philippines
18 Apr 13
It's sad that her life is like that now.
Didn't she try to reconcile with her kids? She's pitiful because her family got really broken.
Maybe she should learn from her mistakes and be humble to admit her mistakes.
As to her meddling, maybe because she is older than you , she deemed it her right to give you some advises. But still the decision to follow them or not is still yours.
@cherigucchi (14876)
• Philippines
18 Apr 13
when she came back her kids accepted her and gave her a chance but it is in her character that she feels that though she admitted her misgivings it seems that she wants her children to give back more to her because she said that she is still their mother. I guess it is also because of the long span of time, things had changed between her and her children.
You have a point. may be she thinks that she's older that's why she's acting like that.
@chjavedjatt (6)
• Pakistan
18 Apr 13
you should handle with great care..
u r only her family so therefore u should not leave her alone
u must help her and try to change her attitude somehow and u should take the advice from psychologist for this situation and help her in a great way
@cherigucchi (14876)
• Philippines
18 Apr 13
Yeah, i know. I do not know if I can still do something about her character. Being the younger one, it is not that very easy.