Wife feels that she is treated by husband as a property
By nita04
@nita04 (268)
Philippines
April 28, 2013 5:56am CST
A friend of mine confided to me that she is very much worried about her husband's behavior. Every time she is with a group whether family or friends, her husband won't join them and when they are alone he would ask, "Why are you laughing?" or "You seem so very happy?". If there is an invitation, he won't allow her to join because they are just wasting their time. Or if he saw her talking to somebody, whether male or female, he would right away signal her to stop and bring her home. When they are at home, he would prefer them to be inside the house. He gets annoyed when the children would request to go out. Wife thinks that husband is not happy if she is happy. Any comment for this kind of attitude?
1 person likes this
7 responses
@sid556 (30959)
• United States
28 Apr 13
At the very least,he sounds controlling, paranoid and jealous. I would be willing to bet there may be some more serious mental disorders going on there. It is not a healthy way to live, that's for sure. Maybe he is depressed? I think she should try to convince him to get some help for the sake of all of them. how long have they been together? You mention children & they are married so it sounds as if they've been together awhile. Is this something new or has he always been this way?
@nita04 (268)
• Philippines
28 Apr 13
sid556, she had been giving me a hint before, but I just brush it off as normal, they'd been married for almost 30 years, and she said she's trying to understand him, maybe because of the children who are still very small, but now that they're grown the more he became possessive.
@sid556 (30959)
• United States
29 Apr 13
Unless he gets some sort of help then I don't see any hope in him changing. I have dated controlling men like that and it never lasted long. I will say that I never catered to their insecurities either. I would just be myself and do what I wanted which was never anything that should hurt a healthy relationship. Hers does not sound healthy at all.
@extremefun4fun (2908)
• India
28 Apr 13
I also feel like that before and that was fact.... I still maybe sometimes feel like that with the same behave of my hubby as your friends face, too. I think we can make some changes if we stop thinking that much about what and why he is doing that! better to make our mind busy with something better and try to imagine if husband is coming with smiley face and said let's go out!
sometimes I do that and I see some changes..
@nita04 (268)
• Philippines
15 Dec 15
I have posted this way back 2013 but until now I am very sorry for my friend since her husband does not change a bit. Worse, he is also jealous with her co-worker with out any reason. No matter how he explains everything that there is nothing between them. The husband always stays in front of the office of my friend. I ask her why she suffer like this when the children are already grown up. She just answered that " He has nowhere to go if they separated." Most often, she treat her husband out just to let him feel secured but nothing happens. I'm sorry but I just told my friend your insane.
@Hatley (163776)
• Garden Grove, California
14 Dec 15
He sounds like he is very controlling and m,aybe on the wa y to beibg a wife batterer. I would divorce that scary moro n so fast the
wou ld not knoiw what hit h im.
@blackrusty (3519)
• Mexico
28 Apr 13
Well this is to sad to hear and yes it does sound like the man is very unhappy with his life and that that is around him nothing is a waste of time if you use the time for the right reasons if I was in your friends and kids place I too would feel as I was just being kept
@rocketking (189)
• Singapore
29 Apr 13
Maybe he feels he is alone responsible for her happiness and is hence unhappy when he sees that she is happy without his involvement as it looks as though someone else is doing his job. Perhaps she should talk to him about it, in a marriage there should be communication and they should let each other know their views.
Sorry fot the word. 
@dpk262006 (58678)
• Delhi, India
28 Apr 13
Your friend should better confront her husband and ask him the reasons for his weird behaviour. Just following his orders on every occasion will further precipitate the situation. Your friend's husband should pay due regard to her as she is her legally wedded wife.
