Another scar

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I know he didn't mean it. I know he did what he felt was right. At least I think I know what it was. I want to believe in him, I want to be his girl no matter what we go through, but I don't know if he still wants me or he just doesn't want to hurt me. I remain faithful no matter how much my heart breaks, aches, and yearn for him to love me like before or even better. I remain hopeful even when every text between us I make him think I'm okay but I'm not. I've never felt this horrible before. Before I only cried for a short time and sometimes because I felt stupid, but with this one, I cry because now it's even more open for a girl to take him from me, the thought of that happening is one scar. I cry because all the things we planned for each other may not happen because of that girl, that's a scar. Most of all the thought of what we were and what ended up happening was something I'd never imagine. To know his love isn't the same as I feel for him, that when we do talk I can't call him babe, I can't "I love you" I can't hug and kiss him every time I see him. It's just another scar deep into my already beat up heart. Right when I felt complete, when I felt like nothing could break us...he was gone and my heart went with him but he also took his from me so I'm left alone, cold and alone...and no one to really turn to.