Another Unfriending on Facebook

@Rollo1 (16679)
Boston, Massachusetts
August 20, 2015 6:18pm CST
I don't mind posting my views on Facebook and I don't mind others doing the same. I don't mind when people disagree with me or debate with me. I don't delete or block them just because we have vigorous debates. I even put up with all kinds of insults, because for some people, calling you names is their idea of debate. But if I ever hope to make any kind of dent in their thinking, I have to ignore it all and just keep talking to them. Alas, other people are not so stoical. After they've called me names and insulted me for simply arguing my point, they get upset with me and unfriend me. I don't really know why they are so upset that they must delete me, after all, they are the ones who resorted to name-calling. Is the art of debate lost? Do you avoid or ignore people who disagree with your point of view? Do you block or delete them? Are you able to discuss issues with people who hold other viewpoints without rancor? Are we in a world that is so polarized that we self-segregate into groups of only like-minded individuals? How boring is that?
8 people like this
9 responses
@rosekiss (30414)
• Eugene, Oregon
21 Aug 15
I had a friend of my daughters on Facebook, and lo and behold, one day, I went on Facebook, and she wasn't my friend anymore., I don't know why either, and to top it off she was my daughterr's best friend, and she unfreineded herr too. I think it is all so stupid too. I won't go into deatail but I had rented to this so called friend, she moved, and then things took a turn that I will never understand. I guess I didn't need her anyway. She is supposed to be a Christian too, and that is not how a Christian should act. She was also a contact on my phone, and poof gone from there too. Oh well, I have lots of other friends that won't do that. Disagreement will alway happen, and we all have to be adult about it. I guess she wasn't at all.
2 people like this
@Rollo1 (16679)
• Boston, Massachusetts
21 Aug 15
I get disappointed when my daughter breaks it off with a boyfriend who had friended me and then the boyfriend unfriends me. I guess it's not always a good idea to get to like their friends too much. But it sounds like your story has a lot more to it. I don't know why people can't take the high road on disputes and be more mature about things.
1 person likes this
@rosekiss (30414)
• Eugene, Oregon
21 Aug 15
@Rollo1 I don't understand it either. I am not upset she unfreinded me, it just the way she did it without any warning or sayinga anything to me or my daughter. My daughter reallydoesn't care either, as she said that if she wants to be that way, then so be it. It makes no sense, but oh well, got to go on anyway.
1 person likes this
@yugocean (9963)
• India
21 Aug 15
It is something odd or difference or indifference, many relatives also unfriend me because our Political views were different. I didn't unfriend or blocked them.
1 person likes this
@Rollo1 (16679)
• Boston, Massachusetts
21 Aug 15
You had relatives unfriend you? Wow, that is really bad when your relatives can't overlook your differences.
1 person likes this
@yugocean (9963)
• India
21 Aug 15
@Rollo1 Thats truth, they were supporter of a self claimed honest politician ( Now Chief Minister of Delhi) and I supported Narendra Modi (now Prime Minister of India) and they cant stand it
• Mandaluyong City, Philippines
24 Aug 15
Like wise here yugo there blocking me and without saying anyting to me thats not fair right blocking you and unfriend you without warning or any message
1 person likes this
@flowerchilde (12529)
• United States
21 Aug 15
Oh boy.. you said it.. I had that experience also.. And I'm one to stick to calmly discussing an issue.. but like you said, for some it's simply name calling, and then censoring, i.e. shutting us up, turning us off by deleting.. I had friends of 30 years unfriend me on facebook! For disagreeing with what I thought was unfair propaganda to start with.. not that I said it quite like that, but maybe I should have! Not that it would make any difference.. I think of such ones as "true believers" and they're not about to change their mind.. whereas others are more reasonable.. I have no problem in real conversation, about politics, or whatever.. Not so easy to turn me off i guess plus one can see one's expression and hear one's tone of voice..
1 person likes this
• United States
21 Aug 15
@Rollo1 absolutely.. and I had that experience also, the taking of every point I made as somehow personal "against" them.. Very baffling, that! I really think their impression was that I was yelling at them or something, which was so far from the truth..
1 person likes this
@Rollo1 (16679)
• Boston, Massachusetts
21 Aug 15
Maybe it's that I am almost clinical in my calmness while discussing. And although they can accuse me of all sorts of terrible things, they take everything personally when I try to discuss things. I guess you are right - true believers? maybe. Maybe they just have the one viewpoint and can't look beyond it. The people who will tell you that your information is wrong without viewing your information, because they've got their minds made up.
1 person likes this
@celticeagle (166761)
• Boise, Idaho
21 Aug 15
I am rather outspoken and enjoy a good debate. I think others have the right to disagree with me or anyone else. I feel that I have a feel for those that I won't enjoy debating or communicating with and I have the right to unfriend them on Facebook or anywhere else. It is my right to go about picking and choosing who I am friends with on Facebook or anywhere else. That is part of the perks of living in America
1 person likes this
@Rollo1 (16679)
• Boston, Massachusetts
22 Aug 15
I have a hard time unfriending people. Even when I hate them, I don't unfriend them in case they would feel bad. But luckily, if we are at odds often, they will eventually unfriend me and I will be eternally grateful.
• Bucharest, Romania
21 Aug 15
Some people have also called me names just because I disagree with them. Not a big deal
1 person likes this
@Rollo1 (16679)
• Boston, Massachusetts
22 Aug 15
Well, it's better if you don't let it bother you.
1 person likes this
• Mandaluyong City, Philippines
24 Aug 15
Theres also some people that change their name for their own privacy and for their own safety.too because you don't know someone might stalking you or following you like your a wanted criminal thats just fair for those people like that
@gregario888 (1276)
• Aurangabad, India
21 Aug 15
Facebook is a place where free-for-all's aren't uncommon.
1 person likes this
@Rollo1 (16679)
• Boston, Massachusetts
21 Aug 15
The whole internet is a free-for-all, LOL But people on Facebook do sometimes get into terrible fights, etc.
1 person likes this
• Aurangabad, India
21 Aug 15
@Rollo1 This place is quite tranquil, in comparison. But Facebook in particular, is a class of its own in flaming.
@GardenGerty (160626)
• United States
21 Aug 15
I think I am kind of oblivious. I did repost a meme that a couple of my friends got really upset about. They are still my friends, though. If anyone has unfriended me, I am oblivious. The people I want to see and talk to are there.
1 person likes this
@Rollo1 (16679)
• Boston, Massachusetts
21 Aug 15
I got unfriended in the middle of a conversation, lol. You probably have the best attitude, just don't worry about it.
1 person likes this
@much2say (55562)
• Los Angeles, California
21 Aug 15
I stay out of it on Facebook. I have friends who are on both sides of any fence and some have no problem posting exactly what's on their minds. And others have no problem making their arguments against someone else's opinions. Debating can be good, but name calling is immature, and it sure can get ugly on Facebook! I remember one friend posting that she would unfriend anyone she saw supporting a particular political candidate. Really? Can't a friend have a different opinion?
1 person likes this
@Rollo1 (16679)
• Boston, Massachusetts
22 Aug 15
I wouldn't unfriend someone whose opinion was opposite to mine, but I would try to change their mind. So, I suppose I could annoy people after a while.
@Danzylop (1120)
• Philippines
21 Aug 15
I always had to to face this kind of people all over facebook. Some would even comment on your photos with something impolite. I do unfriend them, if not, I restrict my post to keep them away from destroying my hobby. facebooking is almost as important as having your phone with you.
1 person likes this
@Rollo1 (16679)
• Boston, Massachusetts
21 Aug 15
Some people do need to be deleted, especially if they leave nasty comments on your photos . I would definitely delete someone who did that. I don't think Facebook is that important, but I do use it daily.