Why I choose to live alone!

@GreatMartin (23672)
Ft. Lauderdale, Florida
August 25, 2015 8:38am CST
It took me 50 years, 4 exes, a love of my life and innumerable mini-affairs to realize that I prefer, enjoy, need to live alone. I make/am a great friend, adviser, listener but as a life partner a dud. It could be I am too selfish, unwilling to compromise when it comes to ME, unable to sustain a physical relationship with one person or a million other reasons. And it's NOT that I haven't found the right person--I did in 1981 but it couldn't/didn't last.And when you don't make it with the love of your life you have to take a look at what is happening. Why do I like living alone and don't feel lonely? Let me tackle the latter first. I have 7 different, very close friends. If I want to go out to a movie or play, attend an event, spend time at the beach, share a joyful time, cry on someone's shoulder or just talk they are available. If I want to have a physical encounter I have a group of people to call upon. Now as to not being/feeling lonely: I have many interests such as reading and writing that take up a lot of my time and there are only 2 things I don't/won't do alone--have sex and eat out in a fine restaurant. Advantages of living alone: 1) I can come home and not have to worry about how the person I live with is feeling, what kind of mood they are in. 2) If I don't want the TV on it stays off. 3) I can watch what programs I want nor do I have to buy another TV to solve 'arguments'. 4) I have the whole bed to myself. 5) I do what I want when I want 6) I can eat, read or do anything else I want in bed without having to worry about annoying/disturbing someone. 7) I can eat what I want when I want. 8) I can get up or go to sleep when I want. 9) I can smoke, fart, pick my nose, scratch my butt (Oh, I know YOU don't do any of these things) use my fingers to eat (Oops! Maybe I should have listed this separately after the other things mentioned :o)) without any comments or put downs or silly laughs 10) I don't have to hide anything, including what i watch or put on the Internet. 11) Not having a person talk when I am watching and/or doing something when I prefer quiet. 12) I like to vacation, take trips alone, and stop/see where/what I want for as long as I want. 13) I can be sloppy or neat, clean after myself or not without 'nagging'. 14) I can be responsible for myself only and not for someone else. 15) I can have the a/c on or off--depending how I feel. 16) I can say and/or think "I" as much as I want. 17) I won't/don't do anything I don't want to do. 18) I can eat the whole cake, box of chocolates or cookies, bag of potato chips, etc. myself. (I told you I was selfish!) 19) If I run out of something it's my fault. 20) I don't have to lie--not even a 'white' lie. And the list can go on. The only advantage I can see to having a live in partner is that when you get old and/or sick someone can take care of you. Besides all I have seen or read about partners are the problems they had or are having. Plus I don't have to go through the heartache of a breakup :o) I have never regretted the decision to live alone! (Oh yes I can take all the selfies I want like this and not be sneered at!
15 people like this
12 responses
25 Aug 15
I had this great fear before of getting old alone but after my 11 years of marriage collapsed and a few failed online relationships I realized being alone and single is more beneficial for me. No bleeding heart. No emotional stress. No expectations. No disappointments. And I believe in every situations there will be options for us to choose from. Thats why right now Im not only saving for my children's college education but also for my retirement. If nobody will take care of me someday then I will just pack up my laptop, makeups, stilletos and all my favorite sexy outfits and confine myself in home for the aged.. I just hope Mylot would still be up and alive by then so I will be spending my remaining years interacting with all the nice people I met here. "Being single is not a status, its an affirmation that you are a gifted one."
26 Aug 15
@GreatMartin At least in nursing home there will be someone who will assist me in the toilet when I can no longer manage to do it by myself.
2 people like this
@GreatMartin (23672)
• Ft. Lauderdale, Florida
25 Aug 15
@happytobehere No old folks home for me!!!
2 people like this
@GreatMartin (23672)
• Ft. Lauderdale, Florida
26 Aug 15
@happytobehereagain At that point I will have taken my pills!!
1 person likes this
• Israel
26 Aug 15
Feels a bit lonely. I dont think i could do it myself, really afraid of being alone
2 people like this
@GreatMartin (23672)
• Ft. Lauderdale, Florida
27 Aug 15
Not one bit lonely--never have enough time to do what I want to do!! LOL
@owstalaga (4707)
• Philippines
10 Oct 15
I think I'm part of your club. It's good you have a good number of friends to spend time with.
1 person likes this
@GreatMartin (23672)
• Ft. Lauderdale, Florida
11 Oct 15
We are a group of friends who are there for each other when needed and disappear when one wants to be alone!
1 person likes this
@MusesM (584)
26 Aug 15
that's good but i dont want to be alone:)
1 person likes this
@MusesM (584)
27 Aug 15
@GreatMartin (23672)
• Ft. Lauderdale, Florida
27 Aug 15
@MusesM Who says you have to be? This was and is MY choice.
@xander6464 (44163)
• Wapello, Iowa
25 Aug 15
I don't know why so many people fear being alone.
1 person likes this
@GreatMartin (23672)
• Ft. Lauderdale, Florida
27 Aug 15
@xander6464 Well you should know living in Iceland!! As I said I LOVE living alone!
1 person likes this
@xander6464 (44163)
• Wapello, Iowa
27 Aug 15
@GreatMartin I really don't mind it either.
@Suzzycue (17)
• Stratford, Ontario
27 Aug 15
I love living alone for most of the same reasons. I like the idea of friends to do things with and that is what I am lacvking at the moment.
1 person likes this
@GreatMartin (23672)
• Ft. Lauderdale, Florida
27 Aug 15
For me making friends is harder and more important then 'getting' a partner--I have found a lot of work goes into keeping and making friends but they are less demanding and more giving!
@GardenGerty (160612)
• United States
25 Aug 15
If I were to be widowed again, I would not remarry. I have loved both of my husbands, but I also could use some self directed time.
1 person likes this
@GreatMartin (23672)
• Ft. Lauderdale, Florida
27 Aug 15
I can love someone but don't have to live or spend 24/7 with them! LOL
@abhaijith (2963)
• India
26 Aug 15
Hello Sir, Very interesting to Read. I don't wish to object your views and I don't have enough experience in life, for that. Now I may not fully agree with you,but in future i don't know what my experiences gonna teach me. Now am just enjoying the bachelor life:-)..
1 person likes this
@GreatMartin (23672)
• Ft. Lauderdale, Florida
27 Aug 15
Not everyone is alike and each has to follow their own path but not everyone NEEDS someone!
1 person likes this
@vandana7 (100225)
• India
13 Aug 16
Hey that live in partner thing...you might end up taking care of that person...lol. I am another loner, and I love it like this, though right now dad is with me. :)
@vandana7 (100225)
• India
14 Aug 16
@GreatMartin .. Weird reasoning if you ask me...I mean, it works a whole lot cheaper to employ somebody to look after us if and when some health issues to arise. And think about it, no emotional blackmail whatsoever...
@GreatMartin (23672)
• Ft. Lauderdale, Florida
13 Aug 16
That's one of the main reasons couples staying together--just to have someone be their nurses!!! LOL
1 person likes this
@GreatMartin (23672)
• Ft. Lauderdale, Florida
14 Aug 16
@vandana7 And never having to hear "If you really love me you would......" ARGH!!!!
@inertia4 (27960)
• United States
25 Sep 15
You definitely are a self proclaimed bachelor. Nothing wrong with that at all. If I never married years ago and had kids, I would most likely be alone myself right now. My marriage, as you know, ended and I am with someone else now. And I am only with this other person because I knew her from years ago. And I have my kids every other weekend. But I do envy people that do live alone. Something I always wanted to do. Never got the chance.
@GreatMartin (23672)
• Ft. Lauderdale, Florida
26 Sep 15
Most people go to growing up in their family, going into service and/or college where they live in dorms with room-mates, get married (some many times!) and die living with others--in the past 31 years (and about a 2 dozen years otherwise) I have lived alone--I LOVE it!
1 person likes this
@inertia4 (27960)
• United States
26 Sep 15
@GreatMartin It has to be liberating. Total freedom. I like that. No one to answer to, no arguments, unless you argue wit yourself. LOL. Just kidding. You re a cool dude and a confident one.
@LeaPea2417 (37350)
• Toccoa, Georgia
26 Aug 15
I do like being married to my husband of 27 years and hopes nothing happens I hope we can make it to 50 years.
1 person likes this
@GreatMartin (23672)
• Ft. Lauderdale, Florida
27 Aug 15
@LeaPea2417 I have nothing against couples--for others--my brother has been married to the same woman for over 60 years and I admire him but it is not for me.
1 person likes this
@amadeo (111938)
• United States
25 Aug 15
Hey,I found you.Yes,I know the story here.Did you get a chance to check me out here.I like it here and the set up.
1 person likes this
@GreatMartin (23672)
• Ft. Lauderdale, Florida
25 Aug 15
Visited you and am now following you!