Don't call me "Madam"
By MoonHowler17
@MoonHowler17 (101)
Ballina, Australia
September 18, 2015 4:16am CST
Yes, I am over 50. So what? I don't FEEL old. It really sticks in my craw when people who serve me call me "Madam". It is a term I never use since I don't go into brothels. I suppose younger folk see it as a term of respect. While I do sometimes call very senior-looking men "Sir", I don't share their view of "Madam" and take offense. It is not the brothel connotation - just that young folk take a look at me and decide I am old enough to NEED a respectful title. Where were they when I was pregnant and standing up on a bus when they wouldn't offer me their seat? THAT is the sort of respect I'd prefer.
Don't know whether the guy selling raffle tickets used it as a sales tactic or whether he was just nice. As I walked past, he said "Excuse me Miss, but would you consider buying a raffle ticket on your way out of the store?" I didn't really have money to spare but, yes, he got me in with the "Miss". Had he called me "Madam", I'd not have stopped.
As a result, he got $10 of ticket sales and I have 6 chances of winning a $900,000 house. The lesson here is be nice to people and don't call me "Madam".
9 people like this
9 responses
@arthurchappell (44998)
• Preston, England
20 Sep 15
It is quite standard in the UK to start letters with dear sir/madam, so maybe we should change sir to pimp. Best wishes senora.
1 person likes this
@MoonHowler17 (101)
• Ballina, Australia
20 Sep 15
Haha. Love it @arthurchappell. We tend to address things "To whom it may concern" if we don't know name and title. How funny it would be to receive a letter started "Dear Brothel Manager", especially if the writer was looking for a job.
1 person likes this
@arthurchappell (44998)
• Preston, England
20 Sep 15
@MoonHowler17 To whom it may concern is a great alternative. Brothel manager might work for a soup kitchen boss in charge of making broth.
1 person likes this
@allknowing (137553)
• India
18 Sep 15
I prefer that to when a maid calls
you Aunty!!
you Aunty!!1 person likes this
@allknowing (137553)
• India
20 Oct 15
@MoonHowler17 Aunty is normally used when one is related to each other
1 person likes this
@MoonHowler17 (101)
• Ballina, Australia
18 Sep 15
I think I'd prefer to be called Aunty - and to have a maid 
1 person likes this
@marguicha (223720)
• Chile
7 Oct 15
Yes! Where are the people that will not offer me the seat at the Metro although their knees CAN´T hurt as they are 15 years old.
1 person likes this
@MoonHowler17 (101)
• Ballina, Australia
8 Oct 15
Exactly @marguicha Are manners not taught these days? I was on a crowded bus in my early 20's when a pregnant woman got on. I was the ONLY one to offer her a seat, which she gratefully accepted. That shamed a man in a suit into standing up and giving me HIS seat.
@SIMPLYD (90721)
• Philippines
18 Sep 15
I can relate because i am past my prime too. 
I also don't like being called madam , specially at the office , not because it makes me feel old , but because for me the one who can only be called that is my lady boss . However , i don't call her that too , but just a simple Mam with her name .
I also don't like being called madam , specially at the office , not because it makes me feel old , but because for me the one who can only be called that is my lady boss . However , i don't call her that too , but just a simple Mam with her name . 1 person likes this
@MoonHowler17 (101)
• Ballina, Australia
18 Sep 15
I note you said you are past your prime "too". I think I am just coming into mine.
@TexanTornado (5573)
• United States
20 Oct 15
I have never been called 'Madam', nor have I ever called anyone that. In the states we use, 'Sir' or Ma'am'.
1 person likes this
@MoonHowler17 (101)
• Ballina, Australia
25 Oct 15
@TexanTornado Madam is the Australian equivalent of the USA's 'ma'am'. We just use all the letters
1 person likes this
@jaboUK (64354)
• United Kingdom
20 Oct 15
So how would you address a woman who IS well past her prime? You surely can't call her Miss. Would you think you were insulting her if you called her Madam? Personally I quite like the American ma'am - quite a few people address me like that on this site, and I take it as a mark of friendship.
1 person likes this
@MoonHowler17 (101)
• Ballina, Australia
25 Oct 15
I think I'd just say "Excuse me" and smile politely in her direction
1 person likes this
@elitess (5070)
• Ipswich, England
24 Sep 15
Hey I bought one of them Lordship conservation titles, so once I am a British citizen I will be changing my title to Lord haha. They try to be respectfull I think.
I have had people in my university course with a few more years and I have never treated them with madam - as doing the same things it meant we were all students aiming for the same - finishing the course with success. I think it depends on the instance as well. You can't have someone from customer service not respect you and he would probably call a 30 year old woman a madam as well.
1 person likes this
@MoonHowler17 (101)
• Ballina, Australia
24 Sep 15
Lord @elitess has a certain ring to it I do agree those in customer service - indeed, all of us - need to be respectful. However, "madam" seems to be reserved to those of us over a certain age. I love your view that all people on your course, no matter their age, should be treated equally. There should be more people like you 
I do agree those in customer service - indeed, all of us - need to be respectful. However, "madam" seems to be reserved to those of us over a certain age. I love your view that all people on your course, no matter their age, should be treated equally. There should be more people like you 
@MoonHowler17 (101)
• Ballina, Australia
18 Sep 15
Haha. Yes. Same thing, Madam in Australia equals Ma'am in Canada and the USA.
@TheHorse (220083)
• Walnut Creek, California
20 Oct 15
I'm ambivalent about being called "sir." It doesn't happen often, but it feels "distancing," especially here in the Northern part of the United States. But I admit I occasionally use "ma'am" or "sir." Not to people of any particular age. It's just when I'm feeling a bit out of sorts and feel the need to be very formal and respectful.
1 person likes this
