Comedian

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When I think about who would tell the funniest jokes, I first think – the life and soul of the party – you know – that dude we all know – the one who makes a party (or a ‘gathering' my 19 year old tells me – it’s NOT a party) just by turning up, saying something silly, pulling THAT face, saying “Yay” with his thumbs up in that certain way of his – and everyone laughs and has a good time because (insert name) is here… Well, that’s not me, I’d be called “serious” in most circles. Actually, I don't "do" circles. I much prefer my own company. It is not that I WANT to be serious, it is just that life has been crap at times and I’ve lost my edge and my spark. I was the one who tries to put herself out there, says something funny and no one notices. 2 seconds later, someone says what I SAID and everyone bursts out laughing. I think “Why did I bother?” I'd rather be home talking to my dog, listening to music, having a smoke, looking at the gorgeous views than talking to people anyway. I am a hermit except when I choose not to be. When someone suggested I do stand up, I thought “Are you joking?. Me, do comedy?” I, very briefly, thought “Why not?" My life IS a joke – or has been at times. It’s good now, I think. Not that I would or could stand up in front of that many people and actually speak. I couldn’t even walk across a room with a fraction of that many people watching me… A psychologist recently asked me if I think I am paranoid… My answer was “I don’t THINK so”. Can’t say I’d ever thought about it before – and it is not a question you hear very often… I don’t know what SHE thought. I didn't care. Didn’t occur to me to ask so, I guess I CAN’T be… For someone who CAN stand up in front of 300 people, being a comedian would be an awesome job. Some of my favourite stand up comedians are Australians most of you would not have heard of – then again, you may have since most of them tour overseas now. I love some international comedians too, like Jimeon, some Americans who come to Australia regularly and my favourite, hilarious comedian of all time, Billy Connolly. That man can say ANYTHING and make it funny. Usually funny AND rude. What all of my favourite comedians have in common is that they talk of everyday things; a single event that you can identify with. It may even have happened to you or COULD have happened to you. It may have been awful, embarrassing, naughty or scary at the time – or a combination - but, no matter what it was, a comedian could make it funny, have you nodding and laughing at the same time with tears streaming down your eyes, a stitch in your side. In hindsight, I think there is a funny side (or at least a funny story IN) to most things eventually. Or maybe the bad just fades and the lighter side comes out. I don’t know. If you’d told me 28 years ago that I could eventually, actually see the funny side of sleeping fully dressed and in joggers for 5 months, ready to jump out the window if my nasty, violent ex – who had already broken my ribs – FOUND where I’d moved to AGAIN and proved it by leaving bunches of yellow roses on my doorstep and then making threatening phone calls at night, I’d say you were nuts. Any of the good comedians could even tell THAT story and make it funny AND get paid for it instead of slinging $300 to per visit to a psychiatrist.