Projecting your mental issues onto others

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Have you ever been having an argument with someone and realized they are actually projecting their inner thoughts and insecurities onto you. Once you start paying attention, it becomes so obvious. Where does the habit of projecting yourself originate? Low self confidence? Insecurities. These people seem to enter into an argument subconsciously angry at themself. It's as if their subconscious self-hate manifest itself into an outward attack in which they have to accuse the other person of what they themselves are unhappy about in themselves....if that makes sense. So someone may know in the back of their mind that they aren't a good listener. They'll watch people around them react to them not being a good listener. They'll start to notice the negative impact of not listening to others. So rather than taking the steps to change that behavior, it's internalized, internalized to the point that the person can no longer accept that are in fact not a good listener. In an argument this person, we'll say person 1, experiences adrenaline which magnifies the actions of others. So when that person 1 feels the slightest bit not listened to in an argument, the other person, person 2, immediately will be accused of "never" listening, or being a bad listener. Person 2 may in fact be a great listener, but that does not matter. Person 1 is angry at their self for their own behavior. Rather than confronting what person 1 doesn't like about their self, person 1 projects this onto person 2. Has anyone else witnessed this kind of projecting? How can someone talk to the person who is projecting to make them realize what they are doing?