The Grief Explorer Quiz

Tweet

I created this exercise in the wake of my father's death with the goal of helping those who are also experiencing grief. Ask yourself the following questions and simply listen quietly to what your mind answers. There's no need to judge, as there isn't a wrong answer. Simply ruminate on the qualities of clarity, acceptance and feeling more grounded. Here's your challenge: Someone I love has recently passed away. One day I feel angry, one day I feel devastated, and another day I feel numb to any emotions. It’s like I’m riding a rollercoaster. How do I cope with this life-changing experience? Exercise: 1. I must realize that losing someone to death is: a) As natural to life as birth. b) Only the loss of the person’s physical body, because the spirit lives on. c) Not something to fear, but a biological process to respect. d) Something I might deny at first, but ultimately an experience that will happen to everyone someday. e) An experience I will pray to come to terms with. f) Other 2. Many emotions accompany the death of a loved one. It’s normal to feel: a) Sorrowful, because the person’s physical body is no longer there to connect with. b) Angry, because it happened too soon. I didn’t have enough time with the person in this moment or in this realm. c) Afraid, because I can’t explain what happens to the person next. I can only have faith that the spirit transcends time and space. d) Relieved, because the person is no longer suffering from pain or negativity in his or her physical body. e) Other 3. Grief plays out in multiple ways. After the death of a loved one, it’s okay to: a) Occupy my time with other activities, such as work and hobbies, to take my mind off the death. b) Turn to church, spiritual guides, or social circles for comfort. c) Lean on my family members and friends by telling them what is needed to help make this difficult time easier. d) Be completely immobilized for a brief period of time. Everyone has their own process and it WILL become easier with the passage of the days, months and years. e) Other 4. Death is scary to me because: a) In popular culture, deaths are shown as excessively violent. b) I’ve never been around someone who has passed away, and the experience shocks me. c) I can’t imagine my life going on without my loved ones physically being a part of it. d) I’m not sure how to notice signs of communication from loved ones after they have passed to the other side—but I’m willing to keep my eyes, my ears and my heart open. e) Other 5. I can accept the thought of death because: a) I know people who have died – or I can think of people who have died in my friends’ lives – and life has eventually returned to equilibrium for them. b) My spiritual convictions tell me that the physical form is simply a bodysuit for the spirit. No one really dies, because their soul carries on. c) For every birth, there must be death. It’s the natural order of things. d) When it’s your time, it’s your time. The Universe and fate will make that call when you’ve completed all your missions on earth and are ready to return to your spiritual Home – where you’ll be greeted by those loved ones who have already passed before you. e) Other 6. I can cope with a loved one’s death by: a) Talking to my loved one who has passed. He or she can still hear me, and will love to have their name spoken out loud. b) Journaling my thoughts and feelings surrounding my loved one’s death, and even writing letters to my deceased loved ones. The writing process is healing. c) Sharing my feelings with family, friends, spiritual advisors and mentors. Everyone wants to listen, and everyone wants to know how they can help. It’s my job to tell them. d) Realizing that my deceased loved ones are now my spiritual guides and guardian angels. They will find a way to communicate with me through signs, symbols and feelings that I will learn to recognize over time. These messages will help me determine my own life’s direction and purpose. e) Visiting the site of my loved one’s burial – or place of death – often. This is where their physical body last lay, so it’s a great point to connect with their spirit. f) Other Congratulations, you’ve completed The Grief Explorer exercise. I hope that after reflecting on your feelings, you’re further along your path to healing.