Why is it so hard to take a compliment???
By cassandra
@Castlerock34 (2259)
Minneapolis, Minnesota
November 10, 2015 11:31am CST
You know what a nasty trait to have? Insecurity. How does one not be insecure with themselves? How can people in your life get mad at you for being insecure?
I have a problem with being insecure, I cant help it. I do not have a lot of self confidence in the way I look, why I have no clue. I just thought I never really was that pretty but I hear compliments all the time about how people think I am so beautiful. I just dont beleive people when they tell me that. Just recently a "friend" of mine was throwing these compliments out at me and i took the normal road i usually take and not trust what he was saying. Then he gets upset with me because i make him feel uncomfortable with himself. How in the frick does that happen?? So now he isnt talking to me right now.
Can maybe someone give me some advice on this?
14 people like this
10 responses
@Jessicalynnt (50523)
• Centralia, Missouri
10 Nov 15
even if you dont agree, a compliment is a compliment, perhaps simply say thank you, and let them be entitled to their own opinions, even if you disagree
4 people like this
@Missmwngi (12915)
• Nairobi, Kenya
10 Nov 15
How about practicing to say thank and add nothing more to it
3 people like this
@Castlerock34 (2259)
• Minneapolis, Minnesota
10 Nov 15
its so hard to just leave it at that when you are face to face. I always think there is a motive to why they are "buttering" me up you know
3 people like this
@Missmwngi (12915)
• Nairobi, Kenya
10 Nov 15
@Castlerock34 That means you got to have to appreciate and love yourself first and then you can be able to appreciate what others love in you
1 person likes this
@Castlerock34 (2259)
• Minneapolis, Minnesota
10 Nov 15
@Missmwngi Trust me I am trying to love all of myself. I am just in a lull right now. I have to pick myself up or no one will want to be around me
3 people like this
@Hatley (163776)
• Garden Grove, California
11 Nov 15
hi@Castlerock you need to remember you are the only one like you you are unique, like yourself, tell yourself I like me, I am somebody I am unique we all are think about it our fingerprints and our eyes are
like nobod y elses we all are unique, we are somebod y , use this as a mantra and soon yo u will feel confident believe in you.
2 people like this
@Castlerock34 (2259)
• Minneapolis, Minnesota
11 Nov 15
I really like you train of thought, beautiful. Thank you everyone for your kind words of wisdom.
1 person likes this
@cherigucchi (14876)
• Philippines
11 Nov 15
It is better to say thank you than giving these people you don't believe a cold acceptance of the compliment. Who knows, may be their compliments are sincere enough
1 person likes this
@lokisdad (4226)
• United States
10 Nov 15
self esteem is a problem for many people. If you grow up always being called stupid or ugly after a while you might get around to believing it. Then when someone says the opposite you struggle to believe them. The only reason I can think of that someone would get upset us that they think you think they're lying but beauty is a thing of perception. Some people think tiny woman are beautiful and others find them unattractive because they seem underdeveloped. Some woman like tall men others like muscles. However if you don't feel good about your appearance then it won't make much difference how many compliments you get if you don't believe them. Give them time is all I can say.
2 people like this
@lokisdad (4226)
• United States
11 Nov 15
@Castlerock34 it might but i think sometimes people take things to heart and it seems like the person might have some feelings. Men don't always do well with rejection. I wouldn't worry if they don't talk to you again they aren't worth your time or good to have your friendship.
1 person likes this
@Castlerock34 (2259)
• Minneapolis, Minnesota
10 Nov 15
Do you think that could be considered as disrespectful from the other persons point of view. I don't believe them when they say I'm pretty type thing?
@Castlerock34 (2259)
• Minneapolis, Minnesota
11 Nov 15
@lokisdad thats probably the best thing Ive heard all day! I wasnt really rejecting him, I just didnt agree with him with the comment he made about me
1 person likes this
@BACONSTRIPSXXX (14351)
• West Haven, Connecticut
10 Nov 15
Some people just cant take it, nowadays females see compliments as a man flirting or trying to sleep with them ect
2 people like this
@BACONSTRIPSXXX (14351)
• West Haven, Connecticut
10 Nov 15
@Castlerock34 Exactly! Point well made, im sure you will be fine lol And welcome to myLot!!!
2 people like this
@Castlerock34 (2259)
• Minneapolis, Minnesota
10 Nov 15
@BACONSTRIPSXXX Thank you! It has been a super good experience so far. most of you are so nice
@Castlerock34 (2259)
• Minneapolis, Minnesota
10 Nov 15
Yeah I think I am conditioned that way since Ive had it happen to me so many times. It doesnt help that I have trust issues with men lol. But first and foremost I have to love myself ;-)
1 person likes this
@dpk262006 (58676)
• Delhi, India
11 Nov 15
How come you don't like to be complimented, appears strange to me. Even if you feel that each one is trying to impress you by complimenting you, do you think all are fake?
May be few of them could be your genuine well wishers.
If you feel that no one is trustworthy around you, then it could be problematic.
Nonetheless, you are looking beautiful in your avatar.
@dpk262006 (58676)
• Delhi, India
11 Nov 15
@Castlerock34 It is difficult to understand whether they are below your standard or otherwise.
If you are sure that there is hidden motivate behind their appreciation then I agree with your statement about not liking compliments.
@Castlerock34 (2259)
• Minneapolis, Minnesota
11 Nov 15
Well for one I dont think I am up to their standards, im not sure if that is the correct terminology. But the way they compliment me makes me feel that they put me on the pedestal I don't believe i should be on.It also makes me uncomfortable and I also think they want more you know
1 person likes this
@Castlerock34 (2259)
• Minneapolis, Minnesota
11 Nov 15
@dpk262006 the sad part is that I am attracted to this person and I really like him and the reason why that is sad is because I pushed him away with my insecurity
