The Truth Hurts
By dorianna
@dorianna (509)
United States
November 13, 2015 12:03am CST
'The truth hurts' no doubt most of you have heard that said time and again. It is true that at times the truth can sting. When we are making a mistake, we don't want to be told.
Telling the truth can lose an opportunity for friendship and turn others against you. Not everyone wants the truth. Even when they ask you, often they want you to lie a little to make them feel better.
I contend that even if truth stings, in the long run, the end result is better than a lie. I for one tell the truth. And, yes, sometimes it has cost me a chance for friendship. But a true friend is one who will be honest with you as well as appreciating honesty from you.
Some think there are situations where it is better to lie (white lie) to prevent hurting or being hurt. How do you feel? Do you think it best to lie sometimes. I do not mean minding your own business..but if someone asks your opinion about something or about an occurence, or invites you in a debate do you think it important to be honest foremost?
9 people like this
12 responses
@Pattitude (1287)
• Newton, North Carolina
13 Nov 15
Sometimes I am too truthful. I have learned through the years to be more tactful!
3 people like this
@1hopefulman (45120)
• Canada
15 Nov 15
That is something I need to work on, that is, to answer with kindness and tact, but still tell the truth. Lies do no good as they deceive people and later they will hate you even more or accuse you of lying to them.
1 person likes this
@Pattitude (1287)
• Newton, North Carolina
14 Nov 15
@enlightenedpsych2 Yes, I agree and I have learned this with practice and age.
And in that case the Truth will really hurt ! 
@SIMPLYD (90722)
• Philippines
15 Nov 15
@enlightenedpsych2 Yes, that too would really give a person a feeling of being appreciated .
1 person likes this
@inertia4 (27960)
• United States
13 Nov 15
I hate lying to someone. I rather be honest and truthful. I am the type that is up front and actually very blunt about things. Not everyone likes that. But, there is nothing I can do about it. I am not going to change who I am. And you're right, the truth is better in the long run.
2 people like this
@arthurchappell (44998)
• Preston, England
13 Nov 15
trying to hide painful truths can make matters worse as once the truth comes out the lie becomes an additional hurt
2 people like this
@dorianna (509)
• United States
13 Nov 15
Perhaps I should rephrase..what I meant is if someone asks you about something, not necessarily to tell the truth, like asking your opinion..should you tell the truth even if you know they may not really want to hear it? Is that how you meant it?
1 person likes this
@dorianna (509)
• United States
15 Nov 15
So true, the truth will sting if you tell them, but the sting is far greater when they find out and they know. It damages the relationship in that they are never able to fully trust you again. The friend may get angry and depart from the relationship for a while if you tell them right at the onset, but in the long run they will remember your loyalty and probably return to the friendship eventually.
1 person likes this
@1hopefulman (45120)
• Canada
15 Nov 15
You are so right, not everyone wants the truth. Actually very view have a love for the truth. However I love the truth and telling the truth. I prefer to be hurt with the truth then to be deceived with a lie. How can I ever trust someone who lies?
1 person likes this
@Drosophila (16571)
• Ireland
15 Nov 15
"...And the Truth will Set You Free.." What I tell myself, when I attempt to deceive myself.
Regarding others, I guess you're asking whether I would tell people what they want to hear, or what the truth is. Telling the truth in a tactful way is what I've always tried to do.
Example 1: You've seen Friend A's boyfriend out with another girl. She asks you about it. I'd say, I did see them together, but that is it, and that's all I know. I then try not to enter more hypothetical discussions over who that might be etc.. because no good can come out of it.
Example 2: Friend B put some weight, she asks me "do you think I've put on weight?" I'd say, "Yes, a little." She follows up with "do you think I should go on a diet?" I'd say, "That's up to you." Then I would go on to reassure her, to me she is gorgeous anyway. What's important in this case is for me to reassure her that whether she put on weight or not, it doesn't affect my opinion of her.
So I guess telling the truth is the right thing to do all the time, but there are ways to go about it to minimise the sting.
1 person likes this
@dorianna (509)
• United States
15 Nov 15
Yes, one should do their best to be kind even tho the truth is necessary. I appreciate your first example. I, too, hold to the fact that telling the truth is not gossip, we can offer the truth without opinion because our opinion of what we evidenced could be misconstrued and is not really our business. Stick to the facts is the kinder way.
1 person likes this
@Rationalwriter (1813)
• Lucknow, India
16 Nov 15
A friendship will never end if you tell the truth!! Yes the person may stop talking to you at the moment becuase of clash of thoughts but if you are right, then that person will come around after realising the truth!!
1 person likes this
@Rationalwriter (1813)
• Lucknow, India
16 Nov 15
@dorianna If they are blind enough to not see that you mean their good, then you are better off without them!!
1 person likes this
@dorianna (509)
• United States
16 Nov 15
Yes, generally, if they are a true friend they will come around. There are a few instances, however, where the truth was painful enough (a cheating husband, for example) where the sting is so great that pride or emotion may keep the friend away for a long time.
@dorianna (509)
• United States
16 Nov 15
I understand and no there are others that feel thus. This is why if someone ask an opinion, I try to say as little as possible but I do warn them not to ask if they do not want truth for it is the only way I can go. It is indeed a quandary and needs tact..
1 person likes this
