Tales of the Village – Three Pubs and a Pubcat

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Someone once told me, many years ago, that you never meet anyone worth knowing in a pub and up to now, he's not been proven wrong. Our village has not one but three pubs and I don't really rate any of them. With a population of around 5000 people, you might think a village like ours could easily support three drinking establishments. Add in the inhabitants of the villages nearby that have no pubs, and it seems like a pretty good catchment area. In reality, that's not the case at all. All three are struggling to survive and one closed recently because the manager couldn't make a go of it. In the 11 years we've lived in the village, each pub has changed hands several times. Each of the three is completely different. One is popular with pensioners and is more of a restaurant than a pub. Nobody under 35 would be caught dead in there. The food is OK but there's such an air of age and decay about the place (no, I'm not talking about the customers) though I noticed recently that they had painted over the terrible dark colours and wood chip wallpaper. The second of the pubs is in a beautiful old stone building with a large, stunning conservatory. For a few years it was an excellent place to eat but we've not eaten there for several years. It's probably the place more likely to attract in people from other villages and the clientele is slightly younger than the first. And finally there's my cat's pub. He is a pedigree Blue Burmese so you might imagine that he'd want to find a posh pub. Quite the opposite. Baloo hangs out with all the local builders, plumbers, window cleaners and electricians. His is the pub where – according to my old neighbour – the barman can fix you up with some veterinary grade ketamine or plenty of more conventional stimulants. Baloo is totally adored by the regulars who started a Facebook page for him about 18 months ago. We've been called out late at night when he won't get off the pool table and somebody wants us to 'take him home' but mostly he just gets handed around from one person to the next getting cuddled and adored. I have never eaten or drunk in that pub and think it unlikely I ever will but it's reassuring to know my lad is being well looked after. And now the latest dining controversy is the forthcoming opening of an Indian restaurant. I think sparks will fly.