Some People Totally Amaze Me How Selfish They Can Be

@poehere (15123)
French Polynesia
December 29, 2015 12:56am CST
Today I came in from work with some candy a person gave me for the family’s son. They asked me if I wouldn’t mind taking it home for him. However, when I arrived at home my boy friend saw the candy and wanted it. I told him it wasn’t for him, but the little boy. He threw a fit over this one and started a fight with me. He said I could have given him some of the chocolate and I didn’t have to give it all to the little boy. For me when a person gives me something to give to another person I give it to them. I don’t allow others to get into the candy and eat what they want before I give it to the child. I felt he was being very rude and selfish asking for this child’s candy. He had plenty of candy and stuff to eat all week long. This was a gift for the little boy and I was just delivering it to him. How do you feel on this one? Would you of given the candy to another person first and what was left to the child? Or would you of done what I did and give the unopened package of candy to the child? In the end the child shared all of his candy with everyone at home. He offered all of us some candy. So my boy friend got his chocolate in the end. I felt like telling the child there was no need to share the chocolate with my boy friend after the way he acted. I just kept quiet because I didn’t want to start a fight in their home over some chocolate candy. But I am still mad at how selfish he was acting over a gift for a small child. I can’t believe he wanted to eat this child’s candy and not give it to him. How rude can you be? Image Source pixabay.com creative commons
27 people like this
31 responses
@jaboUK (64354)
• United Kingdom
29 Dec 15
You acted correctly of course, as you were just delivering the gift. I wonder how long this guy will continue to be your boyfriend.
5 people like this
@Marcyaz (35316)
• United States
29 Dec 15
@poehere He should feel ashamed and embarasses over the way he acted.
2 people like this
@poehere (15123)
• French Polynesia
30 Dec 15
@Marcyaz Yes he does because he did not realize it wasn't me to buy this and a person gave it to me for the kid. We had a talk after I came in again from working. He told me how sorry he was and said he thought I had bought this for everyone and just wanted some chocolate to eat.
2 people like this
@poehere (15123)
• French Polynesia
29 Dec 15
We have been together for 17 years This was a first for me on this one. I have never seen him act like this ever. But on the other hand normally if I do bring home candy it is always for him because I don't eat it. He just wanted some candy and I refused to give it to him because it wasn't mine to give this time. In the end he was embarrassed how he acted and now feels so bad over all of this. That is how he should feel
5 people like this
@vandana7 (100638)
• India
29 Dec 15
There are rules for asking. He contravened those. Taking from an elder person who has enough is fine. Taking from a small child whether he or she has enough is not fine.
2 people like this
@vandana7 (100638)
• India
29 Dec 15
@poehere ..that too.
2 people like this
@poehere (15123)
• French Polynesia
29 Dec 15
If it is a gift for another person you don't take it and eat it before the person is given their gift. I don't care if it is an elder person or a child. You give the gift and allow the person who received the gift make the decision to share it or keep it for themselves. I was mad at him for the way he acted on this one and especially he is a guest in the home. He came here to be with me for the holiday season because I am working here. He should know this one is wrong and should act his age. I don't feel a man of 56 years old needs to act like this over some candy that was given to a child.
4 people like this
@Marcyaz (35316)
• United States
29 Dec 15
@poehere He is certainly old enough to know better, are you pampering him to much I am wondering.
1 person likes this
@jstory07 (140088)
• Roseburg, Oregon
29 Dec 15
That was rude of him to act that way. He probably had lots of his own candy.
2 people like this
@poehere (15123)
• French Polynesia
29 Dec 15
Let me tell you this guy goes to the market all the time and buys ice cream, cookies, and chocolate candy bars to eat. He eats them in his car on the way home. You see the littler all over his car. I have yet to see him come in with any and offer it to anyone. That was one reason I refused to give him any of this little boy's chocolate. It wasn't mine to give him anyhow.
2 people like this
@Marcyaz (35316)
• United States
29 Dec 15
@poehere Like I said he is selfish buying candy and eating it all himself.
@poehere (15123)
• French Polynesia
30 Dec 15
@Marcyaz Yah you might call him this and he does do this a lot. But he also will come in and buy a lot of stuff for others. He did want his Christmas chocolate and he did understand I didn't buy this for the child. So today he went to the market and bought a giant sack of chocolate and brought it in for everyone. Now there is more chocolate in this house and I personally don't see how all this will get eaten. At times on the way in from work he is hungry and will do this one. But he also always brings in stuff here to share with the nieces and nephews. Most of the time I don't even eat this stuff because it is made with milk. I don't mind he does this cause I can't eat this at all.
@boiboing (13153)
• Northampton, England
29 Dec 15
And this is the guy you choose to spend your life with?
2 people like this
@poehere (15123)
• French Polynesia
29 Dec 15
We have been together for 17 years. Normally he is not like this one at all. He is a person who over gives and has nothing left for him in the end. He seriously thought I had bought this candy and I was not telling him the truth. Well anyhow when he found out that I didn't buy it he was embarrassed he acted like he did. I made him feel really bad and told him next time I bring anything home wait till I get in the door to find out where it came from.
1 person likes this
@boiboing (13153)
• Northampton, England
29 Dec 15
@poehere If it's a temporary aberration then I'm sure you forgive him.
2 people like this
@poehere (15123)
• French Polynesia
30 Dec 15
@boiboing Yes I did and he even went to the market today and came back with a giant sack of chocolate. I know he missed his chocolate but I did not realize he missed it this much. It was funny there is so much chocolate in the house now I am sure evrryone is extremely happy.
@JudyEv (342276)
• Rockingham, Australia
29 Dec 15
I don't know how your boyfriend could possibly have expected some candy. It was given to you, on trust, to give to someone else. I would never, ever, have opened it or given any to anyone else. It makes you wonder how he was brought up.
2 people like this
@poehere (15123)
• French Polynesia
29 Dec 15
Yah you are right on this one. He did tell me he thought I had bought this candy. I told him no I didn't buy it. He asked me where I got it. I told him this guy who works there gave it to me for the little boy. He then said he was sorry but he thought I had bought it and brought it home to share with everyone. I told him no. Now he feels really bad for what he did. I told him next time I bring something home don't try and be the first person to get some before the others get any. He is normally the one who shares everything and brings in a lot of stuff when he comes in from work. The kids always run to him and he hads most of it out. It was a total shock to see him act like this last night.
2 people like this
@poehere (15123)
• French Polynesia
30 Dec 15
@JudyEv Yes and when we came in for a break he had a giant sack of chocolate waiting for all of us. The others begged us to take it back to work with us because they ate too much. I left it at the home.
1 person likes this
@JudyEv (342276)
• Rockingham, Australia
29 Dec 15
@poehere At least he feels really bad. That's a positive.
• India
29 Dec 15
one would'nt do that, to my knowledge.If some one asks us to hand it over to his/her family or friends,i think its our total responsibility to do that,because we can just imagine how trust they are having on us.Really it was quite rude.
2 people like this
@poehere (15123)
• French Polynesia
29 Dec 15
Yes I agree and this is what I did. I took it in and told the little boy who sent him this. He was so happy and he was the one who shared it with everyone. That was the say it should of been. Well anyhow my BF thought I bought it and I was being selfish for not sharing with him and only giving it to the little boy.
2 people like this
@poehere (15123)
• French Polynesia
29 Dec 15
@chocolatenightingale Not sure but I was also tired and need to just eat and go back to work. This was totally wrong and it made me mad. After he said he understood and acted wrong to me. He thought I bought it for him to give to him to share with the family and I didn't buy it at all.
1 person likes this
• India
29 Dec 15
@poehere ya even this might be his point of view
1 person likes this
@yukimori (10148)
• United States
29 Dec 15
I'd be side-eyeing the heck out of someone who acted that way over a child's candy. A child's candy, for crying out loud! Yeah, I can't even with that one.
1 person likes this
@poehere (15123)
• French Polynesia
29 Dec 15
Yes this is how I felt when he did this to me. He saw me in the yard holding this and I hadn't gone in the home yet. We just went home to eat dinner and rest for a bit and then go back to finish up some more work. I am glad I wasn't there too long otherwise I am sure he would of said more to me about not allowing him to have some of the candy. It wasn't mine to give him and it wasn't given to him but the little boy. So why would I give it to him. I have no idea where his head was tonight but I can tell you I wan't too happy about this one.
1 person likes this
@LeaPea2417 (37386)
• Toccoa, Georgia
29 Dec 15
I would give it all to whom the present was first going to.
1 person likes this
@poehere (15123)
• French Polynesia
29 Dec 15
Me too and that is what I did. He found out in the end I didn't buy it and now he is so embarrassed and ashamed to act like he did.
• United States
29 Dec 15
We can only judge by what you say and I know if that was how my 'boyfriend' acted he wouldn't be my boyfriend for very long. He's a selfish person it sounds like. This doesn't sound like the type of person you need in your life since you are so giving.
2 people like this
@poehere (15123)
• French Polynesia
29 Dec 15
What got me on this one is normally he isn't like this. I have no idea what prompted him to act like this that night. But I do know he has been working away on another island for a few month. When he got home he knew I was working here. He wanted to come and see the festival, spend the holidays with me and see me. The family was so happy to have him here. I did notice he had changes a bit when he returned. I had no idea he had changed this much. Well anyhow after I came home late he was waiting for me and we went to the beach to talk. He apologized and told me how sorry he was for this. He said he thought I had bought this and he just wanted some of it.He did say he did not realize a person gave this to me for the child. Well anyhow all is fine now. He did realize this wasn't for him and was fine with it. He said I was right to give it to the child because it wasn't mine to give to others.
1 person likes this
@maggs224 (2320)
• Alicante, Spain
30 Dec 15
I agree with @jaboUK your reaction was the right reaction. I take it from the fact that you have been together for 17 years your boyfriend is not a boy but a grown man, yet his behaviour over the sweets sounds quite childish.
1 person likes this
@poehere (15123)
• French Polynesia
30 Dec 15
Yes you are so right on this one. He was mad at me and I him. Late last night when I did get back in for work he told me that I was very selfish to only buy this candy for the child and not everyone. He felt I should of bought for everyone and not one person. I finally told him if he had paid attention in the beginning and not tried to talk when I was talking he would of heard me say it wasn't me who bought this. Now he feels like an idiot for acting like this and is ashamed of his behavior. This is one point that I have tried to make with him all too often. When a person speaks listen and not talk at the same time. Now he learned a major lesson and he was too busy talking and not listening. He feels like a jerk now in the end and is saying how sorry he was to me all night last night. I finally said shut up and go to sleep I am tired. Once is fine and please stop now. I need to get up early and go back to work tomorrow. All is fine now and all seem OK after it all came out in the end. I jsut don't like people like this and he knows it and knows me all too well.
@PainsOnSlate (21852)
• Canada
29 Dec 15
Sounds like he needs to grow up and learn how to behave like an adult. That wouldn't have happened in my house, a gift is a gift, not something for everyone.
1 person likes this
• Canada
29 Dec 15
@poehere Good at least he does have a heart.
2 people like this
@poehere (15123)
• French Polynesia
29 Dec 15
@PainsOnSlate He usually has a giant heart. I know most of the time when he gets back from another island he brings all kids of stuff for the kids to have. He also brings in a lot of fish to share with the family here. I was just so shocked that he did this it made me so mad last night. I saw no need for this. but he understand all this and is very sorry he did this. I know him he is a good person and has always had a big heart.
2 people like this
@poehere (15123)
• French Polynesia
29 Dec 15
Yes last night I do agree with you on this one. He was acting like a spoiled brat and I was totally angry with him. I wouldn't even talk to him before I went back to work after dinner. But at work I did talk with my friend their and he told me I needed to talk with him when we got home. I know I did and I had planned on it. But anyhow in the end he figured out it wasn't me who bought the candy and it was a gift for this child. He then felt really bad. He said he was so use to me buying a lot of chocolate for the home this time of year he just wanted some. I told him then today go to the market and buy some because all of the Christmas chocolate is on sale. He said he would go and pick up more for the family so everyone can have some Christmas chocolate. I know him he will do this one because he loves his chocolate.
2 people like this
@shellyjaneo (1081)
• United Kingdom
29 Dec 15
I would be having a serious word with him if my boyfriend acted like that. That is terrible is he a child himself ? I can't believe an adult would act like that over chocolate x
1 person likes this
@poehere (15123)
• French Polynesia
29 Dec 15
You know what me too. Well I was still angry when I went back to work. When I got home I was still angry and we did talk. he was the one feeling ashamed in the end. He said he thought it was me who bought this. I told him now and then he felt really bad the way he acted on this one.
1 person likes this
@poehere (15123)
• French Polynesia
30 Dec 15
@shellyjaneo At times I think he is like 5 and other times he is his age. I guess guys just like to always be a kid. Oh well he knows he is wrong and admits it and he has said he was sorry a lot. So guess I need to let this one go but I told him next time he needs to not be greedy and want something before others have it too. Normally he is not this way I have no idea what got into him this time.
1 person likes this
• United Kingdom
29 Dec 15
@poehere He should feel ashamed but at least he can see what he did wrong. Men are just like children sometimes. I always say I have one toddler and one Teenager, the teenager being my 28 year old partner x
1 person likes this
• Singapore
30 Dec 15
Oh dear. He can't give in to a child for candy?? I would have done what you did. The candy wasn't mean for him anyway.
1 person likes this
@poehere (15123)
• French Polynesia
30 Dec 15
Yes you are so right. When I wrote this last night it was a major problem. Since then he said to me I was selfish because I only bought a small amount of candy. Now he knows it wasn't me to buy this. So all is fine and worked out well when he found out it was a gift. He felt really bad and went out and bought a giant sack of candy for everyone because he loves Christmas Chocolate for all of us to eat. He really thought I only bought for the little boy because he wasn't paying attention to me when I told him it wasn't me who paid for this. OH well it is fine now and he feels bawd over all of this.
1 person likes this
• Eau Claire, Wisconsin
29 Dec 15
Exactly how old is your boyfriend? I am thrown off because I couldn't see a grown man throwing a fit over candy intended for a child.
1 person likes this
@Marcyaz (35316)
• United States
29 Dec 15
He seesm to be a very selfish person trying to take someone else's chocolate. That was rude of him and I would have done as you did and said no way are you going to get any.
@Marcyaz (35316)
• United States
30 Dec 15
@poehere Glad this is not an issue all the time.
1 person likes this
@poehere (15123)
• French Polynesia
30 Dec 15
Yes he did make me very angry. But he should of know if it was me to buy this it would of been for everyone. He wasn't thinking and I know I was tired when we came in to eat. All in all it worked out and he found out it wasn't me to buy this but a person gave it to me fro the little boy. Normally he is good about all of this stuff. People give us stuff to take home for our nieces and nephews and we always do this and give it to them. Never once at home has he taken any of it. I guess that is why I was so shocked on this one and surprised he was acting like this one last night. He found out it wasn't me to buy it and he feels so bad about all of this. It is fine now and he keeps telling me I should of told him. I tried but they were calling us for dinner and we were already late.
1 person likes this
@nonersays (3335)
• United States
29 Dec 15
Wow, that does sound very selfish and rude. Wanting to take candy from a baby? I would have been very angry at him. Just because a kid is a kid doesn't mean the kid doesn't deserve to get the entire gift that someone else is giving them. Some people just think the whole world belogs to them.
@nonersays (3335)
• United States
31 Dec 15
@poehere I'm glad it was a misunderstanding on his part. But still, even if you HAD gotten it yourself, someone shouldn't be expected to buy candy for a whole family if they are getting it for just a kid, you know?
1 person likes this
@poehere (15123)
• French Polynesia
30 Dec 15
Yes this is exactly how I felt last night when I came in to eat. I thought how dare you be like this to me. When I did finally get a chance to talk with him and tell him it wasn't me who bought this he then said he was sorry to me. He thought I was being selfish to only buy for the child and not the family. Oh well miss understanding do happen but when you are tired and don't have a lot of sleep you would think your partner would be a little more understanding. Guess it goes to show me I should of communicated better but we were already late and I needed to get back to work too.
@poehere (15123)
• French Polynesia
31 Dec 15
@nonersays This is the Tahitian way. If you buy for one normally we buy enough for all. When we cook at night we make a lot. Why because a lot of time people come by and we always invite them to eat. This is just the custom here. He did not realize it was a gift and he thought it was just for the boy. I know him and if he buys he buys for everyone and not just one person. He has a big heart but this night he had a very sour one in my book because he didn't pay attention to me when I told him I didn't buy it and it was a gift.
• United States
30 Dec 15
Yes, that is rude on your boy friend's behalf. The candy was for the child and if he wanted candy badly, he could go buy himself candy! In the end the child was very sweet to share his candy with everyone.
@poehere (15123)
• French Polynesia
30 Dec 15
Yah it was. What happened is that he did not pay attention to what I had said. He thought it was me to buy this. Well in the end it all came out and now he knows it was a gift and feels bad for being this way.
1 person likes this
@TheHorse (220451)
• Walnut Creek, California
30 Dec 15
Are you dating 17-year-olds, you Cougar you? His response sounds like one of a kid!
@TheHorse (220451)
• Walnut Creek, California
30 Dec 15
@poehere Glad you got it resolved. I was actually thinking five or six too. But it was a misunderstanding.
@poehere (15123)
• French Polynesia
30 Dec 15
@TheHorse Yes it was a big one. Plus here is only here visiting with me and I am gone all day and most of the night working. He just finished a major job and returned back to Tahiti. He wanted to come and be with me for the holidays and the family was so happy to invite him to come. I know he normally isn't selfish at all. When he arrived he had a lot of things for this family he brought with him. so his behavior was shocking and so out of character fro him. He was mad at me for not buying more candy to share with everyone and I was mad at him for trying to take the kids candy. so looks like it is a good ending after all and it is all fine now.
1 person likes this
@poehere (15123)
• French Polynesia
30 Dec 15
No he is 55 and no he is no kid. But his actions last night made me think of a 6 year old and not getting what he wanted. I went back to work and came in. I was still angry. I had a talk with him and told him I did not buy this candy. He thought I bought it and didn't want to share with him. Now that one is stupid and wrong of me if this was the case. Once he realized this wasn't the case he felt so bad. I know he loves the Christmas chocolate we get in this time of year and normally I buy him it. But not this year cause we aren't home. He realized this was a gift after he acted like this. So today he went out and bought a giant bag of chocolate and brought it home for everyone. He is basically a level headed guy but who knows what happened last night to set him off like this one.
1 person likes this
@paigea (36315)
• Canada
29 Dec 15
That was very rude! If I ever needed to deliver candy again, I would make sure to hand it over before the boyfriend saw it!
@poehere (15123)
• French Polynesia
29 Dec 15
Yes you are right. But normally I do buy a lot of chocolate for the home and he has all he can eat there. Here I didn't buy any and he thought I had bought this for him to have some and also the family. I was so angry when it first happened because of his reaction. After I came back from work again I told him how I felt and told him how rude he was. He said he was sure I had bought this and just wanted one piece of candy to test it before I went in the house to hand it out to everyone. I told him no it was not me who bought this and that is why I refused to give him any.
1 person likes this
@paigea (36315)
• Canada
29 Dec 15
@poehere I am glad it is sorted out now!
1 person likes this
@Shiva49 (26789)
• Singapore
29 Dec 15
Quite childish to demand a candy not meant for him. I deprive myself chocolates when there are children around eager to have more of the share. I have heard of a proverb that on every grain is written who will consume it! In the end the child proved a man - after all, a child is the father of man! siva
@poehere (15123)
• French Polynesia
29 Dec 15
Yes it was childish of him to act like he did. I couldn't agree with you more and I was angry with his actions. But in the end when I came home again I told him how mad I was. He did not realize this was for the little boy from a person who works in the building we are working in right now. He swore it was me to buy this and bring it home. Well all is well and done now and he feels ashamed to act like he did. He just wanted a piece of the candy before I went in the house. Normally at home he has a lot of chocolate this time of year to eat and this year I didn't buy any. He was sure I had bought this for hm and the family. Finally I told him next time ask me before demanding and throwing a fit when it isn't even me who bought it.
2 people like this
@poehere (15123)
• French Polynesia
30 Dec 15
@Shiva49 Yes this one did end well. It is so out of character for him and I was so angry when he did this one. But like you say it all ended well and he was not listening to me when I told him it was not my candy and I was just delivering it to the child.
1 person likes this
@Shiva49 (26789)
• Singapore
30 Dec 15
@poehere All is well that ends well! siva