How Dare He Do That To Her On New Year’s Eve

@poehere (15123)
French Polynesia
January 2, 2016 12:51pm CST
My best friend’s husband left her home alone on New Year’s Eve alone to go and spend it with his ex-sister-in-law. My GF called me in tears and told me that he husband is the biggest scum she has ever met in her life. After what I heard I have to agree with her. I’m happy she did what she did. Here is the short of what happened. She has been plagued with an ex-sister-in-law that her husband’s family has disowned and will have nothing more to do with her. But this woman keeps hanging on and calling her husband day in and day out with tons of reasons he needs to go over there to her home. Her husband jumps up and runs each time she calls. However, when the call came at 9 PM on New Year’s Eve asking her husband to go there he accepted. The two of them had plans for this night and they were leaving to go to her family’s home for a New Year’s Eve party. When she heard the phone ring and who the caller was on the other end she exploded. Then her husband accepted the invitation and told her to go to the party alone. While he was on the phone she started screaming and telling his ex-sister-in-law off and told him to his face if he left and went there he would need to take all of his stuff, including his dirty underwear and go over there to live. He was no longer welcome in her home and he would never see their children again. He walked out the door and told her he would meet her at the party. She told him he was forgetting something. He said no that he was just going over there to spend a little time with his ex-sister-in-law and wish her a Happy New Years. After he left she grabbed 4 large trash can bags and started shoving all of his clothes into them. She found all of his things and put them in her car. Afterwards she drove to the apartment where he was and started throwing all this stuff over the gate. She was screaming and told this woman to keep him and wash his dirty underwear. He was no longer welcome in her home. Apparently all of the stuff in the bags was thrown in the parking lot. She got back in her car and went to her family’s home. She is staying there now with her 3 children. He tried to go there to see her and her brothers refused to allow him in. They ended up in a fight and her brothers were beating on him until he left. I personally don’t get this guy’s logic or reason. He tried to convince everyone nothing is gong on with him and his ex-sister-in-law. Personally, I think he is sleeping with this woman. There is no man who will go to some woman’s home in the middle of the night just to talk and watch TV with her. Give me a break I am not stupid and nobody else is either. What would you have done if this had happened to you? Would you ever accept your husband to go to his ex-sister-in-laws home alone without you? Image Source - personal image
19 people like this
25 responses
@paigea (36315)
• Canada
2 Jan 16
very sad especially for the children. I don't know what I would do.
3 people like this
@Marcyaz (35316)
• United States
2 Jan 16
It is sad and the children would no longer be allowed to see their father.
1 person likes this
@poehere (15123)
• French Polynesia
2 Jan 16
If it was me I would of jumped over the fence to that apartment building and gone to knock on the door. When she answered the door I would of slapped her in the face and thrown all of his stuff at her. I wouldn't put up with this mess at all. It is bad enough that he goes over there all the time but on New Years that has got to be the lowest one ever.
1 person likes this
@poehere (15123)
• French Polynesia
2 Jan 16
@Marcyaz Yes you are right. She doesn't want the kids to see their dad right now. I am hoping in time she will change her mind on this one. Not sure what will happen because she is so upset right now.
2 people like this
• United States
2 Jan 16
It does not sound like he has any sense, and to be honest in my thoughts, if he is sleeping with this woman, why flaunt it to his wife? He does not have the sense he was born with? Well in any case, if the wife cannot bear this, as I believe not many woman could, I would leave as she did so. It is good she has family and brothers that will support her. It would be an awful situation if she had no family around.
2 people like this
@poehere (15123)
• French Polynesia
2 Jan 16
Yes you are so right on this one. I will be back home in about 8 to 10 more days. She is not going to go back to the house until I arrive. She wants to switch the home with one of her brothers. The house is build on family land and it belongs to her. I gave her the name of my friend who is a lawyer and on Monday she will call Social services and the lawyer. She wants out of this mess now I will be there for her when I get back and until then there isn't a lot I can do from here but to talk with her on the phone and give her some tips and people to get a hold of. But now it is the weekend and she can't call anyone. I told her to stay with her family at least this way he can't come back around there to see her.
1 person likes this
• United States
2 Jan 16
@poehere Yes she is better to stay where she is safe for now til you get back and also the brother can help her get her house back. What a mess and a terrible start to the new year. Still I believe she is wise to have acted quickly and stuck to her plan. You are a great friend.
1 person likes this
@poehere (15123)
• French Polynesia
2 Jan 16
@TiarasOceanView Her and one of her brothers is switching houses. Her brother wants her to take his house now because it is bigger for her and the 3 kids. He will move into her home and take it. Here families stick together and this is how it can be from time to time. I'll help her move out when I get back. They don't want to do anything now until she can call some people on Monday.
1 person likes this
@Asylum (47893)
• Manchester, England
2 Jan 16
It would be impossible for me to judge because I only know one side of the story. I am not condoning his behaviour, but without knowing for certain it would unfair to offer any opinion.
2 people like this
@poehere (15123)
• French Polynesia
2 Jan 16
Yes I can understand this one. I have seen this for sometime now and told her a long time back to dump him. But she just found out she was pregnant with their 3rd child and didn't want to dump him. She was sure he would come around. But oh well it id done now and I do have to agree this guy is a scum and I was there when he ran out on her many times and refused to take her with him.
1 person likes this
@Marcyaz (35316)
• United States
2 Jan 16
Not sure what I would do it would all depend on how much I trusted him.
1 person likes this
@Marcyaz (35316)
• United States
2 Jan 16
@poehere then he is a no good guy and she is better off without him.
2 people like this
@poehere (15123)
• French Polynesia
2 Jan 16
@Marcyaz I couldn't agree with you more. I wanted her to leave him awhile back. But she was ordered to complete bed rest for 7 months. Her baby was sideways and this was the only way to keep her from delivering early. She needed help and I guess he was around to do this one. But from what I have seen he is not around a lot and it is her to brings in the income for their family. He works now and then but doesn't have a steady job.
1 person likes this
@poehere (15123)
• French Polynesia
2 Jan 16
She has tried for a number of years to trust him but now it is too much and she can't take anymore. I have been there when the phone rings and he runs off. I have seen the way he talked to her when she fought with him over this. You can tell he puts this ex-sister-in-law above his wife and kids. He is a scum and I am glad she finally saw this and threw him out.
2 people like this
@thesids (22180)
• Bhubaneswar, India
2 Jan 16
Not knowing the other instances, and basing my opinion on only what you have shared....- I think the family lacks trust. Maybe the guy is telling the truth - as there is no mention of what kind of relationship the guy and his ex-sis-in-law share - remember - that the lady has been disowned by her family and your version does not say anything about her state of mind - it can be tough when things are like you are disowned - you can be lost, you can have a nervous breakdown... so many other things... But that is just my opinion. I feel whatever happened should not have happened the way it did. After all, there are 3 kids who will be the ones who would be suffering. As for - "What would you have done if this had happened to you? " - well, I trust my wife more than I do myself. And I need her more than anyone else. So first, it will not happen and even if it did, I would trust her. And even if she ever played wrong, still, I cannot leave her - Love is a very strange emotion.
1 person likes this
@thesids (22180)
• Bhubaneswar, India
2 Jan 16
@poehere That makes things wrong for sure. If he is honest, he should take his wife too - that would clarify his stand. but as you mention, he is not the right guy.
1 person likes this
@thesids (22180)
• Bhubaneswar, India
2 Jan 16
@poehere That clarifies all that I could have asked for.
@poehere (15123)
• French Polynesia
2 Jan 16
@thesids He is scum and furthermore, why can't she go with him when go goes there. There is always one excuse after another and this one is so strange to hear them all. I don't buy one of them at all.
2 people like this
• United States
2 Jan 16
My husband wouldn't dare do anything like that, he would never intentionally hurt me.
1 person likes this
• United States
2 Jan 16
@poehere He shouldn't judge her on her weight baby or no baby.
@poehere (15123)
• French Polynesia
2 Jan 16
@AbbyGreenhill I know this one. That is what makes me even angrier at him is because of this.I think the ex-sister-in-law said something about his mustache getting grey and when he came home from there one time he shaved it off quickly. He is so self centered and now he claims he is Buddha because this is what she is. It is a joke and this guy needs to seek help badly if you ask me on this one.
@poehere (15123)
• French Polynesia
2 Jan 16
Most men are good men and when they do marry they wouldn't hurt their wives. But some men could care less. I know my GF gained weight with their last baby. She had complications and was on complete bed rest during the entire 7 month before the baby was born. She is working on losing weight and getting back into shape. Her husband doesn't like the fact she is a little over weight and out of shape. For god shakes she only had a baby 7 months ago. What does he want an instant miracle. I feel like this is part of the problem and this only makes it worse on her.
@Hatley (163776)
• Garden Grove, California
2 Jan 16
He he I wo uld have gone a step further, Taken the dierty clothes opened the door , told the sister in l aw keep these they are all yours and keep him too. Then I would have given her one parting slap and yelled"ou scum husband stealer you"
1 person likes this
@poehere (15123)
• French Polynesia
2 Jan 16
This is how I would of reacted too. I wouldn't of put up with this mess and allowed it to go on as long as it had. I got sick of seeing this too. I am glad she finally decided enough was enough and doesn't want him back again in her life.
@mommaj (23112)
• United States
2 Jan 16
That definitely sounds like he is doing something he shouldn't, especially if he jumps up everytime she calls. I think I would have kicked him out or at least given him an ultimatum a long time ago.
@mommaj (23112)
• United States
2 Jan 16
@poehere You are a good friend to her. I wish her luck.
1 person likes this
@poehere (15123)
• French Polynesia
2 Jan 16
She wanted to kick him out before now but she was hoping to try and save their marriage for the kids. Now she sees no other way and has thrown him out. When I get home I will help her move everything out of their home. I know her family gave her this land and built the home for her. It is her home and she is trading it with one of her brothers. She no longer wants to live in this house. But for now she is with her mom and will stay there until I get done and can come back and help her move out.
2 people like this
@poehere (15123)
• French Polynesia
2 Jan 16
@mommaj Thank you so much. I wished I was there now but she has a wonderful family who is helping her now.
1 person likes this
@yukimori (10148)
• United States
2 Jan 16
At the very least, there's emotional infidelity involved. Good for her for putting her foot down and not tolerating that BS anymore. It's never acceptable for someone to put someone else above their spouse, but it sounds like that's exactly what he was doing. Makes me wonder if something like that is a factor in why the family will have nothing to do with the ex... seems like they all know something's up with her.
1 person likes this
@jaboUK (64354)
• United Kingdom
2 Jan 16
He'd be history as far as I was concerned. She's well rid of him.
1 person likes this
@poehere (15123)
• French Polynesia
2 Jan 16
Me too. I'd of gotten rid of him a long time ago. I wouldn't of allow this to go on as long as it has now. I know she loves him and now has 3 children with him. But this is no reason at all to do this to his wife. Men can be such a jerk when they want to be. What gets me is he doesn't even try and hide what he is doing. He just leaves and goes there and on top of t his he tries and kisses her when he walks out the door. Now that one is sick in my books.
2 people like this
@Drosophila (16571)
• Ireland
5 Jan 16
I am curious.. has your friend spoke to this ex-sis in law? I would probably do that, just to hear what she has to say about it all. Then.. well, let's just say your friend was too nice on this pair.. I wouldn't have been as kind.
@Drosophila (16571)
• Ireland
9 Jan 16
@poehere well... lol. I'd scratch her eyes out for sure. xD
@poehere (15123)
• French Polynesia
9 Jan 16
@Drosophila Yeah I almost did. I can't stand women like this and feel there is no place for them around others. I think this breed of women need a classification all of their won and an islands to live on away from others. Fill the islands with the cheating boyfriends and husbands and women like this and I think they would all be so happy living there together. They all deserve each other and good people don't need them around for sure.
1 person likes this
@poehere (15123)
• French Polynesia
9 Jan 16
Yes many times she spoke to her. But this woman could care less. She acts like a helpless child and begs and cries for her husband to come and help her. I have meet her in the past and she is a real work of art. She even tried to get her claws dug into my boyfriend and even my nephew. But they know what type of a women she is and they don't want anything to do with her. Personally knowing this women and her reputation I know for a fact she loves to drag men and sleep with them. She is not as helpless and innocent as she tries to come off as. She is a real home wrecker. That one is for sure.
1 person likes this
• Otis Orchards, Washington
3 Jan 16
I think she did the right thing. This story reminds me of something that happened with my neighbor. Her boyfriend was living with her. One day I heard someone groan. I looked out the window and saw my neighbor pacing back and forth on her porch. Then she went into the house. Pretty soon she came out carrying a suitcase. She threw the suitcase into the yard. Then she went back in and came out with a pair of boots. She threw one boot one way and the other another way. Then out came a bunch of clothes on hangers that went flying into the yard. The boyfriend came out, picked up all his stuff and put it in his vehicle then stood there crying. Eventually he got into his car and drove away. I had to go somewhere so I left. When I got back about three hours later, her boyfriend was there. Now they are married and have a baby.
@poehere (15123)
• French Polynesia
3 Jan 16
Now that one is a bizarre turn of events. I know this one won't happen and she is seeking a divorce from this guy. She no longer has any faith or trust in him and just wants out of this mess. She said it has gone on far too long and no matter what she is tired of the fights they have over this woman and how he is towards her. She said she just gives up and let this woman have him if that is what she wants. Otherwise he can try and find another person who will accept this relationship he has with his ex sister in law. I know I wouldn't accept this one at all.
1 person likes this
@poehere (15123)
• French Polynesia
7 Jan 16
@RichardMeister Me too why because she got the cell phone bill the other other day and called me. He has been calling her all the time and talking with her. So if he wasn't doing anything there would be no need to call her at all.
• Otis Orchards, Washington
3 Jan 16
@poehere I talked to my neighbor a week later and she said she wasn't feeling well the weekend that happened. That was all that was ever said about it. By the way, I didn't ask her about it, she just volunteered the information. I think your GF is doing the right thing. I also think you are right about her husband sleeping with his ex-sister-in-law.
1 person likes this
@deeraj005 (132)
• Mumbai, India
3 Jan 16
Salute to your friend for reacting according to the situation. I am not mature enough to comment on things like this, but I think what she did was absolutely justified. It was just insane of him to leave off his wife on new year's eve to be with his EX sister in law... Shame on him..
@poehere (15123)
• French Polynesia
5 Jan 16
@deeraj005 She seems to be adapting with the help of her family. It will take time and she is no hurry to find another man right now. She needs to think about her kids and where or what she will do next.
1 person likes this
@poehere (15123)
• French Polynesia
3 Jan 16
I couldn't agree with you more. He is a scum and he deserves to be thrown out of the house. I think she is right to dump him. She is better than this and doesn't need a man like this in her life.
1 person likes this
• Mumbai, India
4 Jan 16
@poehere Is she fine now?? What a bad way to start the new year... :( I hope she finds someone better in her life who can give her the attention, love and respect she deserves..
@sgbrown (1638)
• United States
3 Jan 16
It sounds to me like there is more going on there than meets the eye! I would have done the same thing! However, the children do need to see their father, but I'm sure in time she will understand this. She needs to be rid of him! I'm sorry that his how her New Year began.
@poehere (15123)
• French Polynesia
3 Jan 16
Knowing her family they will make sure he sees them. But only at their home and not hers. They don't want him around anymore and he is no longer welcome there or invited there for holidays like in the past. He chose this woman over his wife and family now it is up to him to change and try to get them back. I don't think he can because I have seen some other stuff that was way too strange and she put up with. Seems like it is always like this when she delivers the baby and he doesn't want to be around to help out at all with the other kids
1 person likes this
@poehere (15123)
• French Polynesia
4 Jan 16
@sgbrown Yes I do too. I know how ex comes into play here. But I still can't get why this guy is still running around and chasing this woman who is like 12 years his age. She is a lot older than him, is on anti-depressants for the last 7 years after her son killed himself, and is a major pot smoker. She is known to chase all sorts of men around and doesn't have a good reputation when it comes to sleeping with them either. Now on the other hand his wife is 6 years younger than he is and she has never cheated on him. I just don't get why he has done this one. Basically he has it made now he is out on the street and who knows where he is and personally I don't care. I am just glad he is gone.
1 person likes this
@sgbrown (1638)
• United States
4 Jan 16
@poehere He sounds a lot like my ex-son in law! That is why he is an "ex"! I wish her good luck!
@kaka135 (14931)
• Malaysia
2 Jan 16
As I don't completely understand the whole situation, I can't comment much about what the truth is. But I just think when the wife was already extremely mad about the husband going to the other woman's house at night, he should have just stayed or at least brought her along if he really wanted to take something and just greet the woman. I just can't put myself in the same situation, as I always trust my husband. He has never do something "suspicious" before and I just know he will not. I am just thinking if he tells me he's going over to a woman's house alone, I might just think it's fine. I just don't think it's anything wrong. I guess the way the husband acted or behaved has caused the wife lose the trust on him. Sorry to hear about what has happened to your friend and family. I hope they will be able to settle this soon, and hope the children are fine.
@kaka135 (14931)
• Malaysia
3 Jan 16
@poehere I had a friend who was cheated by her boyfriend. She told me even though she tried very hard to trust him, the trust was just not there anymore. Moreover, the boyfriend really kept cheating on her even though he has made many promises. Yes, I think adults should be responsible on what they are doing. If they have married, they should know there are something they just shouldn't do.
@poehere (15123)
• French Polynesia
2 Jan 16
It is not new and she has tried to believe him and trust him. Just before this night he said he needed to go over there and work. She thought not a lot about this one. But when he showed up at home after midnight this is when the trust ended. She told him then and there if it ever happened again and she called and he ran over there it would be the last time. I feel that nobody should call a married man at 9 at night and ask them to come to their home to spend New Year's Eve. This is totally wrong in my books and totally uncalled for. She went over there on Christmas Day because she wanted to see him then. He is a total jerk and for me he only care of himself and not is family. He can easily say no that he is going out with his wife. But for him to dump his wife and all their plans to go to this woman's home only tells everyone one thing he is cheating on her and cares more for this woman than he does his wife and kids. Sorry I personally don't think it is just an innocent friendship from all I have seen in the last few years.
1 person likes this
@poehere (15123)
• French Polynesia
3 Jan 16
@kaka135 Yes I do agree with you on this one. But they also have 3 kids now so you would think the guy was into his married life with his family. Sure looks like his family and wife don't mean much to him at all.
1 person likes this
• Indonesia
3 Jan 16
Your story sounds like a drama I watch on tv. I like the idea that she kicked him out, but I do wonder what is the reason for him for being so concern about his ex-sister in law?
• Indonesia
4 Jan 16
@poehere do you think your friend will give him another chance if the ex-sister in law come to talk to her? I think, if there's nothing happened between them, she should/would come and talk to your friend to explain...
1 person likes this
@poehere (15123)
• French Polynesia
4 Jan 16
@mrswhitfield This one will never happen I know it. After hearing him say a few things to my friend I know this ex-sister in law doesn't like her at all. I have no clue on this one but that is how it is. I told her one time to go with him and help. I would watch the kids for her and take them to the beach to go swimming. He threw a fit and told her she was not welcomed in that home and that his ex sister in law doesn't like her or want her around. Wow that is shocking and not even the truth behind all of this one. I have a feeling that he has said a lot of bad things to this person about his wife to have her turn on her like this. Shame but it is over and personally I wouldn't give him any more chances. He has way too many now. He needs to grow up and stand on his own and stop all the crap he is doing. He will have a lot to prove to her if she would ever consider taking him back now.
@poehere (15123)
• French Polynesia
3 Jan 16
I did ask him this one. He said he was the only one in his family that she had confidence with to do things for her. Yah nobody can stand her and they all know how she is.
1 person likes this
@yugocean (9963)
• India
3 Jan 16
My GF called me in tears and told me that he husband is the biggest scum she has ever met in her life Your GF ?
@yugocean (9963)
• India
4 Jan 16
@poehere Just friend
@poehere (15123)
• French Polynesia
4 Jan 16
@yugocean Yes and I am a girl and she is a girl so we call them girl friend's in English. In French I just call them my friend. But here we have a word for male and female friends in French.
1 person likes this
@poehere (15123)
• French Polynesia
3 Jan 16
GF is girl friend. Yes she is my girl friend or what you would call a friend and she is a woman or girl. It is just a slang way of saying this.
1 person likes this
@LeaPea2417 (37381)
• Toccoa, Georgia
3 Jan 16
I would do the same thing your friend did, kick him out. Yes, he is most definitely sleeping with her.
@LeaPea2417 (37381)
• Toccoa, Georgia
3 Jan 16
@poehere I totally agree!
1 person likes this
@poehere (15123)
• French Polynesia
3 Jan 16
@poehere (15123)
• French Polynesia
3 Jan 16
I couldn't agree with you more. Nobody spends that many hours in some woman's apartment and just watches TV. Give me a break on this one.
1 person likes this
@JudyEv (342167)
• Rockingham, Australia
6 Jan 16
As soon as his wife got so upset he should have backed off and gone to the party with her. He can't expect any different behaviour from the woman's family.
@poehere (15123)
• French Polynesia
9 Jan 16
You are so right on this one. But he is a self centered jerk and wants life to center around him. Doesn't work this way if you're married and have kids.
1 person likes this
@Violetx (38)
3 Jan 16
She was right to kick him out, if she had been mentioning this to him before and he had still not changed how be behaved towards the ex sister in law then she needed to show him that she was serious. I just hope that things get better and he changes his way...
@poehere (15123)
• French Polynesia
3 Jan 16
I know she will never take him back now. She is done with him and just wants to go on with her life. She has 3 children and the youngest is just 7 months. She needs to move forward for her family and take care of what is needed now. Leave him behind and forget about the looser he is.