My Grandmother Was A Servant.
By Jabo
@jaboUK (64354)
United Kingdom
January 21, 2016 5:56pm CST
My grandmother was 13 years old when she left home to work in the local 'Big House'. She was a live-in domestic servant - a scullery maid. She had no say in the matter as there were no other options available to English 'working class' girls in those days.
This was in the early 1900s, and the class system in England at that time was in full flow. It was very much a time of the 'haves' and the 'have-nots', with the latter expected to cater to the needs of the former.
Granny's life seems to have been one of relentless drudgery. She had to be up at 5am in order to start the laundry and light the fires, and her day ended at about 10 pm.
There was a definite hierarchy amongst the servants - Granny was not only a servant to the 'gentry', but to the upper servants as well, such as the housekeeper and the butler.
Eventually she progressed to being a 'tweeny'. As far as I can make out that meant someone who worked upstairs as well as down - 'between stairs'. This meant that, among other things, she had the honour of emptying chamber pots!
She also had the onerous task of carrying hot water in a sort of covered pail up to the bedrooms, no mean feat for a slip of a girl as it often entailed several flights of stairs. Then when she got there she was sometimes reprimanded for the water not being hot enough.
Granny was not without spirit, and on at least one occasion when 'madam' sent her back down for hotter water, she would summon up all the saliva she could and spit in the fresh water! She got pleasure from knowing that the inconsiderate lady would wash in it. It still made her chuckle when she was telling me about it years later.
Granny endured this life for 5 years and then she met a soldier who was home on leave from WW1, and married him. They had two sons, my father and uncle, who both served in and survived WW2.
They went on to be successful business men, my father having his own art gallery, and my uncle having a florist's shop. Quite a step up from their mother being a scullery maid, don't you agree?
Image from Wikimedia Commons.
64 people like this
67 responses
@LadyDuck (471459)
• Switzerland
22 Jan 16
It was a hard life during those times. My Granny, who was born in 1891, started to work in a silk spinning mill when she was still a kid. They wanted children with good view to start picking up the strands from the cocoon with a fine needle. She lived in Como (Italy), 5 km from where I live now here in Switzerland, she spoke the same dialect they speak here.
6 people like this
@allknowing (136541)
• India
22 Jan 16
This gap between the haves and have-nots existed during our time as well. I have no information about my ancestors working life but I was told that our great grandfather was robbed of gold coins he was carrying as there were no banks then. That is one part of the story
Yes There is quite a step between us and my mother when it came to finance. All her children are doing very well - I could say all of us belomg to the higher middle class and she had to struggle to make ends meet. My father earned very little and had to feed a brood of 9
I can imagine how difficult it must have been for your grandmother to tide over those 5 years.
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@allknowing (136541)
• India
22 Jan 16
@jaboUK I have absolutely no information about what was my great grand father's occupation.
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@jaboUK (64354)
• United Kingdom
22 Jan 16
@allknowing Your great grandfather must have been quite well-to-do if he owned some gold coins.
Your mother must have found it difficult with 9 children, but I'm glad that you have all done well.
2 people like this
@rebelann (112877)
• El Paso, Texas
22 Jan 16
Downtown Abby gives a great rendition of those times. Your granny was the lucky one to have found a husband and gotten out of that mess. What level were soldiers compared to servants at the time?
I have Scottish ancestry but unfortunately I know nothing else about it. So many Americans have roots over there.
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@jaboUK (64354)
• United Kingdom
22 Jan 16
@rebelann Grandad came from the working class too, but joined the army and became a regular soldier, serving in Afghanistan and India before his regiment was recalled to fight in France in WW1.
I think he was much on a par with Granny socially.
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@garymarsh6 (23404)
• United Kingdom
22 Jan 16
Sounds like our grandmothers were of the same time. My gran was forced to leave school at 13 despite the heads disgust who even offered her a free scholarship to go to university but it was not to be for her. Her father said University was for men not women. I think she was quite bitter about that and it was quite obvious she was quite bright. She ran away from service back home she worked for a Doctor and his barren wife who were not kind to her. She got sent back only to do it again. Found herself a husband married and moved from Yorkshire to Dover where my grandfather came from and worked hard all her life. A formidable woman but genuine, honest, kind and funny!
3 people like this
@jaboUK (64354)
• United Kingdom
22 Jan 16
@garymarsh6 It sounds as if you could do a post about your grandmother's life too. I'm so glad that I didn't live in those times when the only escape for girls like this was marriage.
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@garymarsh6 (23404)
• United Kingdom
22 Jan 16
@jaboUK Yes thats true. It was quite sad for them they did have it hard didn't they Janet.
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@Morleyhunt (21744)
• Canada
22 Jan 16
Hard work is not without reward. Too many feel they are owed success and are unwilling to make success happen.
2 people like this
@Morleyhunt (21744)
• Canada
22 Jan 16
@Platespinner okay, I will try to stay on the sofa and be good.
@jaboUK (64354)
• United Kingdom
22 Jan 16
@Morleyhunt There was very little reward for my grandmother - she only escaped the drudgery by getting married.
3 people like this
@Morleyhunt (21744)
• Canada
22 Jan 16
@jaboUK but her family did not use that as an excuse. They made something of themselves.
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@changjiangzhibin89 (16762)
• China
22 Jan 16
You are a good storyteller ,your grandmother's story appeals to me .I admire her for her courage and rebellious spirit .The haves are destitute of human feeling and don't take the have-nots as people .
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@changjiangzhibin89 (16762)
• China
23 Jan 16
@jaboUK Of course ,we had it in the old society.Now we also have cleaners ,caregivers or the like ,but the families that take on them have to put them on an equal footing according to law .
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@jaboUK (64354)
• United Kingdom
23 Jan 16
@changjiangzhibin89 That's the way it should be.
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@jaboUK (64354)
• United Kingdom
22 Jan 16
@changjiangzhibin89 I'm pleased that you liked reading about my grandmother - did you have the 'masters and servants' culture in China?
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@BelleStarr (61102)
• United States
22 Jan 16
I remember this too and loved it then and love it now. My great grandfather was a farm laborer so we were the have nots as well and look where we are now!! lol I think great grandpa would be very proud!! Your grandmother was a spunky one!!
2 people like this
@jaboUK (64354)
• United Kingdom
22 Jan 16
@BelleStarr We are so lucky that a lot of the barriers between the classes have come down now, in fact they are pretty well non-existent.
I think our grandparents would be amazed at the way the world is today.
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@jaboUK (64354)
• United Kingdom
22 Jan 16
@MALUSE It's funny but I hear of more Americans talking about class than the English. I stand by what I say - the old class system is not adhered to today - it's more about how much money a person has.
Is the literature you are reading up to date? I have friends who could rightly be thought to belong to the 'upper class', but they don't claim any privileges. By the same token - I am in no way uneasy in their presence. I have had conversations with Princess Anne and she chats quite normally.
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@Juliaacv (51020)
• Canada
22 Jan 16
Your father and uncle did well, but there's no shame with an honest day's work, even if you are a maid. I actually have a lot of admiration for people that do service work, I don't think that I could do it, I don't like to bite my tongue enough and I don't have the energy.
Her job sounds like it made for some really rich stories to pass down.
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@Juliaacv (51020)
• Canada
22 Jan 16
@jaboUK I would believe it, but I am sure that the servants were "better people" then those that they served. We live near a settlement that was at the end of the underground railroad, where the slaves came up from the south and crossed the border into Canada for a better life. The more that I learn about their lives the more appreciation I have for those that worked the hard "underdog" types of jobs, especially because there was no other choice.
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@jaboUK (64354)
• United Kingdom
22 Jan 16
@Tampa_girl7 My grandmother still had a hard life even when she was married - it was hard work running a house with no mod cons like we have today. But at least her sons made good lives for themselves.
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@jillybean1222 (6407)
•
23 Jan 16
wow, that is quite a story! i watch downton abbey and i tell my husband that what makes it so interesting is that it takes place when the times are starting to change. the servants are realizing that they CAN do more! some try, some are set in their ways, some are afraid. of course, that is merely a show whereas your grandmother is real! so i find it quite fascinating to hear of her finding her way to something better. what a history!
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@jaboUK (64354)
• United Kingdom
23 Jan 16
@jillybean1222 I'm so glad that you were interested in reading about my gran, thank you. I have more tales from this era which I will probably post sometime.
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@jaboUK (64354)
• United Kingdom
23 Jan 16
@jillybean1222 I remember the past so well, but yesterday? - not so much!
@jillybean1222 (6407)
•
23 Jan 16
@jaboUK with the stories you have, you could probably publish a book or at least an article!
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@poehere (15123)
• French Polynesia
22 Jan 16
@jaboUK It sure does. I really got to know my grandma well when I went to live with her for 3 years. We were always very close after this. I loved her stories and all she told. She traveled on a motor scooter with a side car from New York to San Francisco with 2 small children under the age of 3. All they owned was in this side car including her and the kids.
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@Daljinder (23236)
• Bangalore, India
22 Jan 16
It was interesting to get a glimpse of the life during those times.
Your grandmother had it rough but she found her happy ending with a soldier. She raised two sons who achieved so much in their lives. It is truly commendable.
And yes quite a step up.
I chuckled reading the part where she would spit in the fresh water.
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@jaboUK (64354)
• United Kingdom
22 Jan 16
@Daljinder I'm pleased that you found this interesting, Daljinder, thanks.
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@jaboUK (64354)
• United Kingdom
23 Jan 16
@Daljinder That's sweet of you to say all that, thank you. Isn't serendipity a lovely word? That's one of the things I love about this site - we can learn from each other.
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@Daljinder (23236)
• Bangalore, India
23 Jan 16
@jaboUK I have always found your writings interesting and thought provoking ever since I joined this site. Actually I was impressed with your vocabulary. I read one of your post the other day and learned something new. Words like serendipity or the phrase modicum of decorum were known to me but I didn't exactly know their usage.
You took care of that. So thanks for that.
I also enjoy your light hearted poetry.
P. S. Eager to see what you come up with next.......
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@bunnybon7 (50973)
• Holiday, Florida
30 Jan 16
oh yes and over here we had quite the same thing in areas. mostly the blacks got all that bad treatment but some poor whites etc. I think that's why everyone watches downton abbey here. to identify with a lot of it from then. do you watch it there?
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@bunnybon7 (50973)
• Holiday, Florida
30 Jan 16
@jaboUK yes she may not have had a nice one like Mary on there. i identify with it some myself because of having worked with rich people just 10 years ago that treated me sort of the same at times. so there is still some around
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@jaboUK (64354)
• United Kingdom
30 Jan 16
@bunnybon7 Yes I do watch it, it's one of my favourite programmes. I think it's pretty true to life, except real life wouldn't be so entertaining. For my gran at least, it was just hard work all day, then drop into bed exhausted.
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@arthurchappell (44998)
• Preston, England
23 Jan 16
an impressive insight into your family history
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@arthurchappell (44998)
• Preston, England
23 Jan 16
@jaboUK Always good and even important to preserve such fabulous memories of a faded past
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@jaboUK (64354)
• United Kingdom
23 Jan 16
@arthurchappell I was lucky enough to know my grandparents well, so was able to glean stories like this from them.
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@VivaLaDani13 (60794)
• Perth, Australia
5 Feb 16
First of all, I LOVE the photo you picked for this discussion. I don't know why but I really do.
And most of all, this post was AWESOME! Do you have any other stories about that time? The spitting in the water part made me think about the movie The Colour Purple because that's what Whoopi Goldbergs Character did lol
Reading stories like this makes me realise how easy I have it. And also it makes me laugh thinking about the people who constantly complain about how their jobs are too tiring even when it's not a major job. They don't know what hard work is.
1 person likes this
@jaboUK (64354)
• United Kingdom
5 Feb 16
@VivaLaDani13 I found the photo on Pixabay and thought it quite appropriate.
I have done a lot of stories about this era, a lot of them on Bubblews. I'll probably re-write some of them and bring them here sometime. Thanks for being interested.
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@VivaLaDani13 (60794)
• Perth, Australia
5 Feb 16
@jaboUK That would be awesome if you posted more stories on here about it. I mean, no pressure lol but I know I will enjoy them. I have an interest in stories from that era or basically any time before I was born.
1 person likes this
@sgbrown (1638)
• United States
31 Jan 16
What a wonderful post, Janet! This was so interesting, I loved it! I'm sorry your grandmother had such a hard life for a while, but glad she married and got away from that horrible woman! I don't know much about my maternal grandparents, but I do know that my paternal grandparents were very poor and lived on the land of a share cropper who raised cotton. My dad spoke of the days when he was young that he and his brother and sister had to pick cotton.
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