My husband's reaction to my weight loss
@AbbyGreenhill (45494)
United States
February 8, 2016 7:29am CST
When I married the first time I was young and thin, not skin and bone thin but not fat either. After the wedding and six months in Florida for a Naval training class we were off to Hawaii for two years. Hawaii, the land of muumuus, Aloha shirts and other loose fitting and colorful clothing!
I didn't work for two years, not at a real job anyway. I was a Tupperware dealer and while I didn't get rich I did eat a lot of cake and other goodies at the many parties I attended. Since I was at home much of the time I spent a lot of that time cooking - and eating. Back then I had a good stomach and could eat anything unlike now!
Yes, I blew up like a balloon and the by time we flew back to the east coast I was well over 220 pounds. After finding jobs and an apartment we settled into a different married life...family was close and there were issues.
My husband started spending time away and I spent time being upset that I was wasting my life. I was bored. I went into a spiral that led me to drop down to 110 pounds in a very short few months. I lived on cigarettes and coffee, no interest in food at all.
All of sudden I got a lot of attention at work, I was thin. Men reacted to my weight loss and complimented me - my husband didn't. One day we had a long talk and he asked me to regain my weight, he wanted a fat wife. His rationale was that if I was fat no other man but him would want me.
That didn't fly, eventuality we divorced and he re-married the next day! The woman he married was then and still is extremely overweight. I guess he really does like fat women and I bet he's not the only one.
26 people like this
25 responses
@whiteream (8567)
• United States
8 Feb 16
One that was horrible of him to say that to you. I am glad, you are no longer with this person. A man should love you no matter what your size.
two some good men do like large women
4 people like this
@AbbyGreenhill (45494)
• United States
8 Feb 16
There were many other problems but the weight thing pushed it over the edge.
4 people like this
@AbbyGreenhill (45494)
• United States
8 Feb 16
It's funny that two out of three of the brothers married skinny women who got fat and then divorced and married heavy women the second time.
3 people like this
@silvermist (19702)
• India
8 Feb 16
@AbbyGreenhill Okay,what is the opinion of your husband about weight gain and loss?
2 people like this
@AbbyGreenhill (45494)
• United States
14 Feb 16
@silvermist He doesn't care if I am think or fat.
1 person likes this
@AbbyGreenhill (45494)
• United States
8 Feb 16
Insecure and self-centered at the same time.
1 person likes this
@AbbyGreenhill (45494)
• United States
9 Feb 16
A little one was on the way he had no time to waste.
1 person likes this
@AbbyGreenhill (45494)
• United States
9 Feb 16
@Jessicalynnt I'm just glad he moved far far far away so I don't accidentally run him over, I mean see him...LOL
1 person likes this
@Jessicalynnt (50523)
• Centralia, Missouri
9 Feb 16
@AbbyGreenhill just wow. good riddance!
1 person likes this
@fishtiger58 (29820)
• Momence, Illinois
8 Feb 16
That's a pretty unreasonable request. To gain the weight back. He married the next day?? You are fortunate to be rid of him.
2 people like this
@AbbyGreenhill (45494)
• United States
8 Feb 16
Yes, you see his 'girlfriend' was preggers so he had to get married fast.
2 people like this
@AbbyGreenhill (45494)
• United States
8 Feb 16
@fishtiger58 Way more to this story as you have probably figured.
2 people like this
@fishtiger58 (29820)
• Momence, Illinois
8 Feb 16
@AbbyGreenhill What a guy. Warms you heart doesn't it? lol.
1 person likes this
@Marcyaz (35316)
• United States
8 Feb 16
What did he think he was doing saying he wanted you to be fat, how awful when you were beginning to feel good about yourself again. I know some men do want heavy women, why I have no idea but his remarrying the day after the divorce was final sounds like he had been seeing her for a long time.
2 people like this
@AbbyGreenhill (45494)
• United States
8 Feb 16
He has been seeing her for a long time - I didn't know it then but I did figure it out when I found her house key in his sock drawer!
1 person likes this
@celticeagle (168420)
• Boise, Idaho
8 Feb 16
I have known some men who didn't mind women who were hefty. Not many though. I think the media has a lot to do with it.
2 people like this
@AbbyGreenhill (45494)
• United States
9 Feb 16
Don't forget this was back in the early 80's life was different.
1 person likes this
@AbbyGreenhill (45494)
• United States
9 Feb 16
Absolutely...I wasn't ugly, just fat!
1 person likes this
@DWDavis (25805)
• United States
10 Feb 16
@AbbyGreenhill My apologies. I hadn't meant to say you were ugly. Mea Culpa. Your story put me in mind of men who are so insecure they want their wives to be unattractive so other men won't look at them, which put me in mind of that song.
@Marilynda1225 (83103)
• United States
8 Feb 16
Many men are insecure if they have a wife who has lost weight and think if they stay overweight then they are safe in the relationship...WRONG! there are plenty of men who like overweight women so losing a wife is not guaranteed by what the scale says. Men who think this way obviously don't understand love & commitment and it has nothing to do with size
2 people like this
@Marilynda1225 (83103)
• United States
8 Feb 16
@AbbyGreenhill I'm sure there were many other reasons for your divorce aside from this one factor. I had some of the similar problems you mentioned with my Ex huband too
1 person likes this
@AbbyGreenhill (45494)
• United States
8 Feb 16
And I've seen photos (current on Facebook) and he is fat too.
2 people like this
@JudyEv (342277)
• Rockingham, Australia
9 Feb 16
@AbbyGreenhill It's nice they've found each other. 
2 people like this
@AbbyGreenhill (45494)
• United States
9 Feb 16
@JudyEv heck they've been married since the early 80's so it worked out for them.
2 people like this
@AbbyGreenhill (45494)
• United States
8 Feb 16
He was strange, probably still is.
2 people like this
@Scindhia (1906)
• India
9 Feb 16
In my society girls have to be a bit plump and healthy in order to be considered attractive. Thin girls are encouraged to put on weight. Personally weight has never been an issue to me but I'm shocked by your ex-husband's behavior. That was rude and insensitive.
2 people like this
@AbbyGreenhill (45494)
• United States
9 Feb 16
That's the kind of person he was.. and cheap and a bit lazy.
1 person likes this
@JohnRoberts (109846)
• Los Angeles, California
8 Feb 16
Wow, some story. Your ex may like an overweight woman because other men generally won't look and he was possessive jealous.
2 people like this
@AbbyGreenhill (45494)
• United States
8 Feb 16
That's probably it, or since he was so cheap he didn't like me spending money on new smaller size clothing.
2 people like this
@AbbyGreenhill (45494)
• United States
9 Feb 16
@JohnRoberts Seriously, he used to take my mother to the movies and then say, Oh gee I forgot my wallet so my mother paid - she never said a word to me until the day I told her we were separating then I heard all about his cheapness.
@JohnRoberts (109846)
• Los Angeles, California
8 Feb 16
@AbbyGreenhill That is so funny! Too cheap for new clothes!
2 people like this
@salonga (27775)
• Philippines
9 Feb 16
@AbbyGreenhill i find it even more stupid.
1 person likes this
@AbbyGreenhill (45494)
• United States
9 Feb 16
It wasn't stupid he got remarried the next day - the lady was pregnant
1 person likes this
@AbbyGreenhill (45494)
• United States
9 Feb 16
@salonga Well, maybe so...but that's his problem LOL
1 person likes this
@AbbyGreenhill (45494)
• United States
8 Feb 16
I wonder if he treats his current wife the same way - probably.
1 person likes this
@slund2041 (3314)
• United States
8 Feb 16
My husband excepts me however I look. I am a bit over weight, but he loves me the same. I think he trust me enough fat or thin, to know I will always be faithful to him.
I am glad you are no longer with your ex, it doesn't sound as if he cared anything about you. How can anyone marry the next day. He must have already had someone in mind he wanted to be with. Yikes! You deserve better.
2 people like this
@AbbyGreenhill (45494)
• United States
8 Feb 16
They had an affair while we were married...he didn't want to pay for the divorce so he held off...finally my parents gave me the money for the lawyer and out of the blue my husband paid - I didn't' know then but it was because she was preg. so he was in a big hurry to get divorced to get married.
1 person likes this
@LeaPea2417 (37383)
• Toccoa, Georgia
8 Feb 16
How rude of your Ex.My husband likes me the way I am. I am kind of thin and the weight thing is not what bothers me, it is the fact that I have scars on my left leg due to an accident from my past. I think my husband is a good guy that he looks past the scars and still thinks I am good looking. At the beach, he will walk with me on a public beach in our bathing suits and he doesn't think about my scars which makes me happy (even though I sometimes get self conscious),
2 people like this
@AbbyGreenhill (45494)
• United States
8 Feb 16
I don't think a scare is something to be ashamed of at all, many people have scars.
He wasn't rude I don't think , he was and probably still is, stupid.
2 people like this
@AbbyGreenhill (45494)
• United States
8 Feb 16
I guess so, the funny thing was his mother was skin and bones and so was he and his brothers.
1 person likes this
