How Do You Respond to Rude Responses to Comments

@BelleStarr (61102)
United States
February 26, 2016 10:59am CST
I am always surprised when I receive a rude response to a comment that seems quite innocuous. I was wondering what other members do in this case. It was not on an article of mine it was on another members post. I actually deleted my comment and walked away and I will never comment on this member again but I am drawing the line at blocking them even though this was my first reaction. Why do people feel the need to be rude? I have no idea but I know I don't like it and won't tolerate it. Wow, does that make me sound rude? This has kind of ruined my day, it upset me. It was not a mean comment or controversial in any way. Oh well, I can't control others but I can at least control my reaction and I am taking a deep breath and getting over it. Does rudeness upset you? How do you respond?
57 people like this
61 responses
@MALUSE (69373)
• Germany
26 Feb 16
Pity that I don't know what kind of remark that was. I'm not so angelic as you. A possible reaction would be to leave a scathing remark and then block the member so that they can't respond. An eye for an eye!
11 people like this
@BelleStarr (61102)
• United States
26 Feb 16
lol that was the idea that came first to my mind but after typing a scathing response I cancelled it and decided to just walk away. Not angelic really just afraid of a continued confrontation.
6 people like this
@pgntwo (22408)
• Derry, Northern Ireland
26 Feb 16
"eye to eye" or "eye for an eye", @MALUSE?
2 people like this
• Philippines
26 Feb 16
lol
@DianneN (247186)
• United States
26 Feb 16
I also get upset over rude comments. There are some from certain people that are always blunt and sarcastic, either on my discussions or others. There is no excuse for that! I respond by: 1. Ignoring 2. Calling them out 3. Reporting Take a deep breath. Don't be like me!
7 people like this
@BelleStarr (61102)
• United States
26 Feb 16
@DianneN Well then I am sending you a hug, we are very alike. My father was a yeller and I have always hated anything that disrupts the peaceful flow of life!! I am an educated woman and to be spoken down to was more than I could take. This person asked me "are you for real" when I suggested that someone who had a room full of garbage had an illness!!
2 people like this
@BelleStarr (61102)
• United States
26 Feb 16
lol I find the thought of being like you uplifting, you are I suspect made of sterner stuff than I. You have to be to have been a teacher lol. I just want to be treated respectfully no one has to agree with anything I say but this was so out of the blue took me by total surprise.
2 people like this
@DianneN (247186)
• United States
26 Feb 16
@BelleStarr Au contraire! I may be stern with undisciplined children, but I dispise confrontations of any kind. If you look at me funny, I cry and get upset, and it lingers. Remember, people are nuts! Lol! I think that sometimes it's hard to read intonations and facial expressions in writing, but to me, I believe I can recognize disrespect in a snarky comment. There is no reason for it whether one agrees or disagrees with our own comments.
3 people like this
@Marcyaz (35316)
• United States
26 Feb 16
Sometimes I take something that seems to be rude but I try to be nice in what comment I make. I know there are a few people on here who never seem to say much in the way of being nice so I just kind of ignore them now. If they don't agree with me fine as I agree with me.
4 people like this
@BelleStarr (61102)
• United States
26 Feb 16
Yes I know that does seem like a mature response, lol Sometimes my Irish comes out as they say and I just react, I do have a bit of a hair-trigger temper.
1 person likes this
@Marcyaz (35316)
• United States
26 Feb 16
@BelleStarr I used to have a hair trigger also but I have learned to temper it.
1 person likes this
@BelleStarr (61102)
• United States
26 Feb 16
@Marcyaz I usually only burn hot for a second or two then reasons sets in but I was insulted by this response.
@marlina (154131)
• Canada
26 Feb 16
Yes, rudeness offends me but here I just leave the page.
3 people like this
@BelleStarr (61102)
• United States
27 Feb 16
I wanted to make a statement that I didn't find that response acceptable and I thought that deleting my comment sent that message.
@jaboUK (64354)
• United Kingdom
26 Feb 16
I'm so sorry that someone has upset you Isabelle, perhaps they didn't mean to? However, if it happened to me I think my reaction would be the same as yours. Walk away and never interact with them again.
5 people like this
@BelleStarr (61102)
• United States
26 Feb 16
Evidently this is not going to be as easy as that since they have commented on this post, oh dear I guess I am in a pickle now. Pickle over, I deleted the comment and now I will just ignore them.
3 people like this
@BelleStarr (61102)
• United States
26 Feb 16
@jaboUK lol apparently not!! I deleted the comment here as well since I am not going to interact with them. Talk about clueless!!
2 people like this
@jaboUK (64354)
• United Kingdom
26 Feb 16
@BelleStarr Oh my goodness - they commented here? Did they realise you were talking about them?
2 people like this
@boiboing (13153)
• Northampton, England
26 Feb 16
If someone is rude on my post or in a comment on one of my responses, I just delete their comment and move on. I won't give them the satisfaction of the fight they so often seem to be looking for.
7 people like this
@BelleStarr (61102)
• United States
26 Feb 16
I am much more of a lover than a fighter. I don't like conflict at all!!
3 people like this
@Deepizzaguy (102546)
• Lake Charles, Louisiana
27 Feb 16
That is exactly what they want. A fight.
1 person likes this
• Valdosta, Georgia
26 Feb 16
Rudeness does upset me. I usually do just try to move on or vent about it just like you did. I try not to let it get to me but that is really tough since I am sensitive and emotional.
2 people like this
@BelleStarr (61102)
• United States
26 Feb 16
I am sensitive tooo and I always try to be kind. I think we need to respect each other and think before we make comments that may hurt someone or distress them!!
• United States
26 Feb 16
hmm, sometimes such's outta context 'n then some folks're jest that way. so unhappy with their own lives they strike out't whome'er they feel they can. 'n the other hand, could be how they speak'n general? tough call.. i got called'n the carpet myself recently respondin' to somebody's discussion. i was seekin' clarification (they'd contradictory discussions prior) 'n they took such poorly. i apologized fer rufflin' that persons feathers 'n shall avoid'em like the plague. then there's those who seem to thrive'n such dramatics :( jest breathe, my friend! heck, i e'en found myself blocked when i went to a discussion 'bout sunsets. aint gotta clue what i might done to offend 'em, but figure 'tis their loss. there's many here that dislike my redneck-ease with a southern drawl. i get 'ccused'f bein' stupid quite oft. 'gain, their loss :) big hugs!
2 people like this
@BelleStarr (61102)
• United States
26 Feb 16
Big hugs back at you. I just think since we are all adults, keeping a respectful tone is in order. I am not a child to be reprimanded I am an educated woman who is a grandmother!! lol There are just so many charming people on here, yourself included that it seems pointless to waste another thought on someone who has no respect for me. I would be glad to have you ask about something I wrote and we do get some people on here who do seem to contradict themselves.
2 people like this
@BelleStarr (61102)
• United States
26 Feb 16
@crazyhorseladycx It is the same on every site isn't it. Those who would demand respect show so little of it!!
1 person likes this
• United States
26 Feb 16
@BelleStarr thanks!! seems that many folks didn't quite grow up :) 'course, ya know i tend to go a bit wonky 'n snarky when i'm'n steroids... i do jest think that some thrive off the drama though 'n look fer like minds so they can've that co-dependence.
1 person likes this
@TheHorse (218487)
• Walnut Creek, California
26 Feb 16
I'd leave it all up there, just as I used to leave SPAM comments up for awhile on Bubblews (I wouldn't immediately delete them from my posts). I think people should be shown for what they are--good or bad. I don't take insulting stuff personally. I remember the crazy lady from Bubblews who used to call people horrible names if they disagreed with her conspiracy theories. I had to resist the temptation to "mess" with her, and just let it go instead.
2 people like this
@BelleStarr (61102)
• United States
27 Feb 16
I am going to forget all about this tomorrow and start a new day fresh and clear and totally ignore this person.
1 person likes this
@TheHorse (218487)
• Walnut Creek, California
27 Feb 16
@BelleStarr Exactly. It's the other person's issue, not yours.
1 person likes this
@PainsOnSlate (21852)
• Canada
26 Feb 16
I have seen a bit here but not a lot. I too have removed comments when they were not appreciated and I haven't blocked anyone and probably won't. At best I look at it as a typo..they meant to be kind and opps they added an extra word that made it not so kind..Writing is so much harder to know what someone said and meant when you can't see their face. I try to ignore what might be insulting.
2 people like this
@BelleStarr (61102)
• United States
27 Feb 16
I like that they meant to be kind and made an oopsie, this was several oopsies but it is a good way to think of it!!
1 person likes this
• Eugene, Oregon
27 Feb 16
I am not one to let someone be needlessly rude and not respond somehow.
2 people like this
@BelleStarr (61102)
• United States
27 Feb 16
I just didn't want to get into a continuing battle, it was easier just to delete the offending remark and walk away.
2 people like this
• Eugene, Oregon
27 Feb 16
@BelleStarr Your way was probably best I suspect.
2 people like this
@JudyEv (339464)
• Rockingham, Australia
26 Feb 16
I don't think I've had a rude comment. I'm a bit sensitive I think and it would ruin my day as well. The worst I've had is a provocative comment inviting me to bite back over something I'd written but I just ignored it and pretended I was too thick to understand. I'm glad you're moving on. It's not worth the drama worrying about it.
2 people like this
@BelleStarr (61102)
• United States
27 Feb 16
No it isn't and it isn't someone I socialize with a lot I was just being nice and commenting on their post and now I feel like that was a pretty bad idea!!
1 person likes this
@Elizaby (6902)
• Pensacola, Florida
26 Feb 16
I tend to just ignore them as to comment or do soemthing else could stir things up.
2 people like this
@BelleStarr (61102)
• United States
26 Feb 16
Yes I think that is best but I decided deleting the comment was the best way for me to move on.
1 person likes this
@Daljinder (23236)
• Bangalore, India
27 Feb 16
Kill them with your politeness and kindness is what I do... It's harmless and saves me the trouble too... LOL
2 people like this
@BelleStarr (61102)
• United States
29 Feb 16
I don't think I can do that in this case, it would seem so obvious!! I am just going to ignore them and hope they go away, lol
1 person likes this
@Daljinder (23236)
• Bangalore, India
29 Feb 16
@BelleStarr That is another way too.....
1 person likes this
• United States
28 Feb 16
It depends on the situation - I will either go forward or ignore. I never had to block anyone but I have been blocked.
1 person likes this
• United States
29 Feb 16
@BelleStarr I am going to be the bigger person and just ignore
1 person likes this
@BelleStarr (61102)
• United States
29 Feb 16
I am the same, I have been blocked but have never blocked. I have decided to go forward and ignore.
1 person likes this
@silvermist (19702)
• India
28 Feb 16
@BelleStarr Whatever we may say rudeness does upset us and spoils our day. What you did was right.Now you can move on. There are so many considerate people who would like to interact with you.
1 person likes this
@silvermist (19702)
• India
29 Feb 16
@BelleStarr Good for you and that is the spirit.
1 person likes this
@BelleStarr (61102)
• United States
29 Feb 16
Thank you yes there are and I am going to just ignore this other person.
1 person likes this
@Juliaacv (51045)
• Canada
27 Feb 16
Yes, the rude comments really turn me off. I tend to steer clear of anyone that offends me, I've had two members do this, for no good reason. I don't come on the site for drama or stress, and leaving a couple of members alone suits me just fine, like you, I won't block them either.
1 person likes this
@BelleStarr (61102)
• United States
29 Feb 16
Yes I agree, this person adds nothing to my life in a good way and avoiding them is the best approach. So far on MyLot I have met 2 people who are just too rude for my taste.
1 person likes this
@BelleStarr (61102)
• United States
29 Feb 16
@Juliaacv We can nip them in the bud however by refusing to comment on their posts. They will change their ways if they are not making money.
@simone10 (54187)
• Louisville, Kentucky
12 Mar 16
It really does upset me and my first reaction is to respond in kind but then I have to stop myself as that would only make the situation worse. I would have done what you did, deleted my comment and moved on.
1 person likes this
@BelleStarr (61102)
• United States
14 Mar 16
I think it is the best way to handle it, people like that don't ever learn a lesson.
1 person likes this
@simone10 (54187)
• Louisville, Kentucky
14 Mar 16
@BelleStarr No they don't and that's a shame. They just like to stir up the pot.
1 person likes this
@pgntwo (22408)
• Derry, Northern Ireland
26 Feb 16
Deep breath, count to 10, and move on. What goes around comes around...
1 person likes this
@BelleStarr (61102)
• United States
26 Feb 16
Yes there is the whole karma thing isn't there but I think rude people are impervious to karma. lol
1 person likes this
@pgntwo (22408)
• Derry, Northern Ireland
26 Feb 16
@BelleStarr Karma gets you in the end...
1 person likes this
@BelleStarr (61102)
• United States
26 Feb 16
@pgntwo We can only hope lol
1 person likes this
• Midland, Michigan
26 Feb 16
The difficulty here is communication. It would be nice if they'd ask a few simple questions before jumping to conclusions as it sounds like they must have done. Or, they didn't know their reply came across as rude to you. I've no idea and we can't give a true opinion since we didn't hear/read either one. It is difficult, though, when we run across this type of thing, especially when we're gracing their pages with our responses. You'd think they'd at least be thankful for that.
2 people like this
@BelleStarr (61102)
• United States
26 Feb 16
You would wouldn't you. When someone takes the time to comment at least say I don't agree with you but thanks for sharing or something like that.
2 people like this