Happiness is a State of Mind
By Shiva
@Shiva49 (26470)
Singapore
April 28, 2016 11:06am CST
How do we achieve happiness, fulfillment? Or are they just in our subconscious mind when we pursue life and meet its challenges? Does contentment lead to inactivity and laziness?
I have seen some fully immersed in their activities that they just do not seem to care about such. They are always doing one thing or another and hardly have time to think of happiness, goals etc. They have no set goals other than being active, on the move all the time. And their immediate families seem to leave them to their devices. They rarely communicate, spend time together, but for all practical purposes they are a family.
At the other extreme are those who think of the path they take, pause and ponder whether it is worth it. They think of the family and even worry about them to the extent of interfering in their lives, sort of micro-managing to ensure nothing goes wrong. These lead to restlessness and lack of peace of mind, even skirmishes within families.
I am more of falling in between. I have no set goals in life and I tend to accept whatever life has to offer but add meaning or learn from them. Happiness is not a goal but I am contented and count my blessings. My life journey is full of twists and turns but I have no complaints. I also allow others within my immediate family full freedom to pursue their goals and take responsibility but assure them of my support if needed. We are separate individuals, come and leave alone.
How do you live your life? Do you pursue happiness as an achievable goal? How do you accept reverses that are part and parcel of life?
11 people like this
14 responses
@RasmaSandra (77609)
• Daytona Beach, Florida
28 Apr 16
@Shiva49 I try to find something good in each day and find something to smile about.
2 people like this
@Shiva49 (26470)
• Singapore
29 Apr 16
@RasmaSandra It is up to us to see the picture in totality, then we will not be disappointed.
To be up and about is itself something to cheer about - siva
2 people like this
@quantum2020 (12041)
• Ciudad De Mexico, Mexico
28 Apr 16
I live my life according to the precepts of Christianity with respect for people and devotion for the divine. I pursue happiness on daily basis, as happiness is not ever lasting while on earth, but in the heavens. I accept ups and downs which are part of this imperfect life; however, I try to stay in harmony with my surroundings, including people.
3 people like this
@Shiva49 (26470)
• Singapore
29 Apr 16
I am also enjoying the evening of my life after living in hot and humid Asia all my life! The morning of my life made we anxious about the afternoon and evening and the inevitable night and darkness! The afternoon was hot and humid with many breathing down my neck. Now I have shaken off the excess luggage and sort of stretch my legs on online sites for six years.
Life has been good to me but I learnt some bitter lessons along the way. I forgive the perpetrators of those bordering on the evil. Okay, I cannot forget them though I try! To be up and about each day is a blessing now. The rest is a bonus!
The photo is sourced from free site Wikimedia Images and not of me or family. I have a wife and son - siva
2 people like this
@just4him (317038)
• Green Bay, Wisconsin
30 Apr 16
Happiness is never guaranteed. Though I try to be happy, content is probably the better word. I am content with my life for the most part. I do have trouble when life throws its curve balls at me and I need to rethink the whole situation and try to figure out how to work the solution. In those times, I do a LOT of praying.
2 people like this
@Shiva49 (26470)
• Singapore
30 Apr 16
I have one take when storms approach and I am caught in them - this too will pass.
And there have been times when it looked like end of the world but they are soon water under the bridge.
And I am prepared for one thing - change is the only constant in creation, so we have to adapt.
And the beauty in life is when one door closes another opens; in fact many to choose from! siva
2 people like this
@Talknpen (1820)
• United States
28 Apr 16
Good Day Sivaramakrishnan A. Happiness in my opinion is the result of knowing how to be that. When you realize more about what you have as opposed to what you don't have. When you can actually appreciate the ability to experience life. It is a good thing to have family in your life. It is even better when they support and encourage you. We are all a natural wonder in ourselves (mankind/womankind). We make our choices and we are able to learn as we live. I will even say that not everything is in our hands; I can accept fate spiritually at times. I am happy that I am not alone as I go through life. A life determined by a little luck and a lot of hope and faith.
2 people like this
@Shiva49 (26470)
• Singapore
29 Apr 16
Thanks for this thought provoking response Shurhonda.
Yes, I agree most think about what they don't have and forget about what they have - then it is heaping misery on ourselves. We should partake wholeheartedly in the spread that nature gives us, a feast for the eyes and senses!
I don't take life seriously and tend to laugh at my faults and foibles. If I am called to benefit society through my actions, I do that with gratitude at having been given the opportunity. These things add up and block out negative vibrations. I tend to be happy and feel happier when others beat me at happiness - siva
@joygracia (1325)
• Philippines
28 Apr 16
I'm one of those goal oriented individual and currently I feel a bit suffocated on the urge to reach my ambitions. I'm single and focus on making my life worthwhile and I don't believe being in a relationship would make me exultant. I had my heart broken 3 times to discourage me from entering another turmoiled relationship anyway. If only I'd achieve my goals then I'd say I could be happy but then again its not a guarantee to pure happiness. However, it would give me the feeling of fulfillment and satisfaction close to true bliss. I do pray my hopes and dreams will be realized someday that way I can be at peace.
2 people like this
@Shiva49 (26470)
• Singapore
29 Apr 16
Good that you are ambitious to attain your goals but that should not come at the cost of others that matter in life. I have seen few climb all their lives only to realize in the end that they chose the wrong mountain!
As I have said for some the trying itself gives them happiness and fulfillment and not depend on what they achieve, set out to do. As for me, I wanted balance and my work-life was just to earn a living and sincerely too and that gave me fulfillment. As I was working for others I did not want them to unload their rubbish onto me ceaselessly. That will be different if you are self-employed as you call the shots.
Life is s series of compromises. My advice is enjoy the ride too and not get too fixated on reaching the destination. Putting eggs in different baskets serves us well - siva
@thesids (22180)
• Bhubaneswar, India
28 Apr 16
Loved this one for sure. 
Today, I live my life in seconds. I have no set goals, very little expectations from it (life) and take whatever comes across as "it could not have been any better" or even "it could have been worse".
To me, Happiness is definitely an achievable goal because I have cut down on Expectations. Nothing (sadness) bothers me for long now. As long as you as a person do not want to be happy, there is nothing in the Universe that can make you Happy. And once you start feeling happy, there are so many things that can keep you happy. It is all about what you want and how you focus yourself. Shedding inhibitions was my first step. Earlier, when I was working, (i was a teacher) - I would always think what will my students think if I do this or do that. Or even what my bosses or colleagues or even society think? today, I do not have any such thoughts. I know, I can get drenched in the rain, jump over poodles of water and splash it around... and if they make me happy, I do those.
For the reverses or ups and downs - I have started believing there is always a silver lining somewhere... it is all about being patient and staying hopeful.
Today, I live my life in seconds. I have no set goals, very little expectations from it (life) and take whatever comes across as "it could not have been any better" or even "it could have been worse".
To me, Happiness is definitely an achievable goal because I have cut down on Expectations. Nothing (sadness) bothers me for long now. As long as you as a person do not want to be happy, there is nothing in the Universe that can make you Happy. And once you start feeling happy, there are so many things that can keep you happy. It is all about what you want and how you focus yourself. Shedding inhibitions was my first step. Earlier, when I was working, (i was a teacher) - I would always think what will my students think if I do this or do that. Or even what my bosses or colleagues or even society think? today, I do not have any such thoughts. I know, I can get drenched in the rain, jump over poodles of water and splash it around... and if they make me happy, I do those.
For the reverses or ups and downs - I have started believing there is always a silver lining somewhere... it is all about being patient and staying hopeful.2 people like this
@Macarrosel (7498)
• Philippines
1 May 16
Maybe I'm in Between too, as I try hard to be. Although sometimes I'm on the extreme when I invade my daughters lives due to my fear if they go wrong.
1 person likes this
@Shiva49 (26470)
• Singapore
29 Apr 16
@JudyEv During my years working my employer used to talk highly of me and that led to his friends approaching me through him for my services and I had to decline. I used to tell him I wanted to give my undivided attention to his work. At the cost of being misunderstood, I gave more than I received every day and that has stood me in good stead all my life. I took even work as a service
Years ago, I was helping out at a work place on a part time basis. My friend asked me how was it going. I said I was happy and his reply " I know you will be happy anywhere but how do they feel about your performance?" I said since they paid me they should also be happy! siva
2 people like this
@Shiva49 (26470)
• Singapore
29 Apr 16
Thanks, I too don't want to rock the boat now as I am easing into retirement from work life.
The excitement of being alive is itself a source of happiness and then logging into this welcoming site and connecting with people from across the world. Then few days to travel and see the world. And give more than take in every way to spread some cheer.
Nothing else comes to mind to add to my happiness! siva
2 people like this
@innertalks (21631)
• Australia
29 Apr 16
“Don't cry because it's over, smile because it happened.”
This quote is from the well-known American author, Dr. Seuss, (1904 to 1991). (Remember the Cat in the Hat!)
I would add to this, do not cry, thinking something makes you unhappy, cry because crying is another type of smile in your heart.
All comes forth from love, sadness, happiness, and everything else besides.
The good Doctor Seuss seemed a pretty happy chappy!!
What is happiness?
Happiness is that rare state achieved when you place your mind behind your heart, and not the other way around.
Smile about everything, and be happy!!
@Shiva49 (26470)
• Singapore
29 Apr 16
Thanks Steve, life gives us enough to be happy and nature is ever benevolent. The basics are free but we sweat for the perquisites!
I recall Louis Armstrong lyrics:
When you're smilin' keep on smilin'
The whole world smiles with you
And when you're laughin' oh when youre laughin'
The sun comes shinin? through
But when you?re cryin' you bring on the rain
So stop your sighin 'be happy again
keep on smilin Cause when you're smilin'
The whole world smiles with you
It is our choice whether we want to live happily or in misery. The rich tends to have nightmares of becoming poor while the poor dreams of becoming rich.
I have said this before - a rich man's wife admonished him - why live in misery despite all the wealth. The only sound we hear is the jingling of gold coins while for our poor neighbor it is the laughter, That made her husband "lose his mind" and he threw a bundle of coins across the wall. Soon there was argument at the neighbor's home - who took the one coin, there is only nine in this bundle! siva
1 person likes this
@Chellezhere (5639)
• United States
28 Apr 16
According to Harvard's 75-year longitudinal Grant and Glueck studies, happiness is love or “Good relationships keep us happier and healthier.” And, that is how I have always defined it as well.
2 people like this
