Do Not Discuss Religion or Politics With Family or Friends
By slund2041
@slund2041 (3314)
United States
May 3, 2016 12:47pm CST
I feel so strongly that it is never a good idea to discuss religion or politics with friends or family. I even try to refrain from such discussions on message boards and forum type of places. It is never a good idea to write articles or post reflecting one's personal beliefs as it can lead to hurt feelings or angry people. I try hard to follow this rule in my everyday life, to the best of my ability.
I have asked friends and family to refrain from having such discussions around me. There is a particular person who refuses to let those topics rest and only wants people to listen to his view points. He is not willing to hear other people's opinions and ideas on the subject matter at hand.
Even though I find this person to be rude and childish, it is not a person I can just cut off. I am related to this person and love this person dearly. I just wished he would refrain from his personal views regarding politics and religion. He is the kind of guy if you have an opposing viewpoint, he becomes outraged and tells my husband and me to keep our head buried in the sand.
This person in questions knows that my husband and I do not wish to discussed politics or religion, but will not stop bringing those topics up. I told my husband the best way to handle this type of situation was to let it go in one ear and out the other. If the person at hand cannot be mature about it, then we must and not allow ourselves to stoop to his level. I find it to be only an ignorant person that will continue after asked not to do so. I want this person to continue to visit and have an excellent relationship with him. I just hate those type of discussions, especially when he is too childish to debate with others.
Do you find any of your family members or friends to be rude and hard to get along with, because of religion and politics?
17 people like this
17 responses
@OneOfMany (12150)
• United States
3 May 16
I think talking about it is fine. When the other person flat out tells you that you are wrong (especially when you have good logic backing it up) then you want to destroy them.
2 people like this
@slund2041 (3314)
• United States
3 May 16
Yes, it does make me want to destroy them. I have to refrain from it though, because like I said it is a relative without any manners. One that cannot follow the simple rule no politics and religion. I have never seen someone get some outranged over politics/religious discussion in my life.
2 people like this
@slund2041 (3314)
• United States
3 May 16
@OneOfMany I do understand what you are saying, and agree with you. However, that is what this person feels as well. He feels he has so much more knowledge than anyone else, so he cannot listen to anyone else's opinions.
1 person likes this
@OneOfMany (12150)
• United States
3 May 16
@slund2041 I listen to opinions all the time, it's just for that moment I did what I needed to. I typically hold back when it's minor, but she hit a sore spot. Coupled with the fact that I had just traveled all day the day before, it was a subject that could have waited.
1 person likes this
@LovingMyBabies (85288)
• Valdosta, Georgia
3 May 16
I don't think talking about religions or politics is the problem. I think people that cannot be respectful about such things is where the problem comes in. I talk about my Lord and Savior-but I also respect other people's beliefs and opinions. I don't get hostile or angry about it-but I am excited to share my beliefs-and accept when others don't feel the same way. =)
If we all stayed silent about all of our beliefs because of the fear of an argument or disagreement, no one would ever express thoughts and opinions about anything. If we all felt the same way about every thing in this world it would be a pretty boring place! Lol.
2 people like this
@slund2041 (3314)
• United States
3 May 16
I agree with you, but when you have family such as I have it is better to not discuss it. I have one family member in particular that if you disagree with any part of how he thinks, he becomes outraged. It doesn't mean we are not all Christians, it just mean he cannot control his temper. I find it to be counterproductive to get in any debate with him, when one can never agree to disagree.
I think it could be fun to discuss politics but not with people that it is there way only, or the highway. I just find it aggravating that nobody gets to have any opinion but this one person. I think if we all thought the same way the world would be a boring place to live. However, some people you just cannot discuss anything with.
1 person likes this
@LovingMyBabies (85288)
• Valdosta, Georgia
3 May 16
@slund2041 I have someone in my family like that who is always right no matter what you say. I do understand that with someone like that. With other people though, who are respectful I don't have a problem talking about my faith with them. =)
1 person likes this
@slund2041 (3314)
• United States
3 May 16
@LovingMyBabies I do not have a problem having discussion with most people, it is only this one person. He is always right no matter the topic, and everybody else is a bunch of dummies. Crazy! It sucks that this person thinks he is so Christ Like. WOW!
@sulynsi (2671)
• Canada
3 May 16
The unfortunate consequence of barring a topic of conversation because of the way some people discuss it, is that it can cut us off from all sorts of things that might benefit or interest us.
It prevents people from asking important questions out of fear of stirring up a conflict, not necessarily distaste for a subject.
By all means, shut down discussions of ANY topic, when the debater is ignorant, insensitive or unreasonable.
But if the discussion is reasoned, fair, considerate, why should you miss out?
Of course, if it simply doesn't interest you, but that is another issue.
1 person likes this
@sulynsi (2671)
• Canada
4 May 16
@slund2041
I'm glad you agree.
Its the delivery, not the subject.
Talk on, my friend , be not diminished
1 person likes this
@slund2041 (3314)
• United States
4 May 16
@sulynsi It is all the yelling, screaming and fighting that goes with these topics that I absolutely hate.
@slund2041 (3314)
• United States
4 May 16
I think it could be fun to discuss it if the right people were involved, but when you have a no it all type person in doesn't work out nicely.
@Bluedoll (16773)
• Canada
3 May 16
I think your husband is right with family and friends it is best to just let it go and let them find someone that they can debate with. Those kinds of comments like bury your head in the sand are too much of a put down. Who wants to have those kinds of conversations. As far as having good conversations even if they are different but could be thought provoking, do think they are good for us.
1 person likes this
@slund2041 (3314)
• United States
4 May 16
I think debate would be nice if both sides could share their personal view point, but not to allow the other members to have an opinion is crap. I for one hate this type of conversations, because it always leads to this. Now there are hurt feelings on both sides.
@slund2041 (3314)
• United States
4 May 16
@Bluedoll What do you mean by obligation? I do not think their is no harm in discussing ones personal believe or even debating, if you have someone you can have an actual debate with and not a fighting match.
@Bluedoll (16773)
• Canada
4 May 16
@slund2041 Do the frog?
You mentioned religion. Though not an obligation, I think if we desire to discuss our belief's that is okay. My belief is as the bible tells us to speak quietly with love for each other and not to argue.
1 person likes this
@Drosophila (16571)
• Ireland
6 May 16
I actually think it has more to do with the type of person they are.. rather than topics.
I have family members who would love to shove anything down my throat given the chance.
Don't talk science or diets or living style with them. In fact, don't talk to them at all xD
1 person likes this
@slund2041 (3314)
• United States
6 May 16
You are right! It just seems like politics and religion is worse for this particular person.
1 person likes this
@Drosophila (16571)
• Ireland
6 May 16
@slund2041 the topics are not causes, they are merely a symptom of the causes.. a strong minded individual will always be a strong minded individual regardless of the topic.
why they go particularly nuts on these 2 topics? its cos they think these 2 topics are the most important ones in life. The more you avoid talking to them about it, the more they wanna hammer it home.
your have 2 options really, either agree with them.. or agree with them :p
1 person likes this
@slund2041 (3314)
• United States
8 May 16
@Drosophila I do not agree with them, but will keep my opinions to myself. I hate fighting it is bad on my sanity.
1 person likes this
@slund2041 (3314)
• United States
6 May 16
@just4him Yes, it is all doom and gloom. The end of time, and how bad things are going to get. I try hard to be positive and look for better days ahead, but some people are not that way.
1 person likes this
@slund2041 (3314)
• United States
6 May 16
Your Bible Study post does not offend me the least. The person I am talking about is always talking doom and gloom/end of the world stuff. It is so depressing.
1 person likes this
@just4him (317040)
• Green Bay, Wisconsin
6 May 16
@slund2041 If all he spouts is doom and gloom then I understand why you would rather he not say anything. I actually stopped listening to a Christian Radio Station because there was always someone who was gloomy.
1 person likes this
@slund2041 (3314)
• United States
4 May 16
I find the one's that are Ministers or Christians to be the worse one to argue about politics or religion. They always think they have the correct answers and everybody else is a bunch of dummies. I am not saying your father was that way, but the ones I have been around are that way. I realize not all Christians are like the way I described, but most in my family are that way. Most of the people that I have known over the years are that way.
It is wonder that you are so close to your dad. It is wonderful that he is not that way, and you can talk to him about important topics. I know that must be nice, because not all people can have such discussions with the person they call "dad", without some repercussions. It sucks really!
1 person likes this
@Marcyaz (35316)
• United States
6 May 16
@slund2041
It very well could be easier.
1 person likes this
@slund2041 (3314)
• United States
6 May 16
It would be easier to walk away if it was not a close family member.
1 person likes this
@jobelbojel (35489)
• Philippines
8 May 16
I worked with a US-based telecom company and encouraged employees not to discuss politics, religion, race, gender. Everyone has their own beliefs.
1 person likes this
@slund2041 (3314)
• United States
9 May 16
You are absolutely correct everyone has their own beliefs!
@Letranknight2015 (51938)
• Philippines
3 May 16
we don't discuss religion and politics, right now i don't even talk much about it with mom even though it's election period.
1 person likes this
@slund2041 (3314)
• United States
4 May 16
It is best not to discuss it with family (mom included). There is too many bad feelings that could come out of it. This was a close family member that acted this way.
@slund2041 (3314)
• United States
4 May 16
I think it is a good way for parents to teach their children to not discuss politics and religions. There are always so many hurt feelings when people cannot be nice. It seems like both religion and politics change people.
@Macarrosel (7498)
• Philippines
4 May 16
For me it's fine to discuss religion and politics, as long as each parties are wise enough to discuss them objectively.
1 person likes this
@slund2041 (3314)
• United States
6 May 16
I am wise enough, but the one the post is about is not wise enough. He gets to angry if anyone has an opposing view.
@JudyEv (339552)
• Rockingham, Australia
4 May 16
It is a great shame that this man won't respect your wishes. Would it help to threaten to cut off contact with him? Or maybe just agree with everything he says. He will probably know you don't mean it but if you just keeping agreeing surely he will have to shut up.
1 person likes this
@slund2041 (3314)
• United States
4 May 16
@JudyEv You are correct! It is not worth my health getting upset with this person. I find it to be rude of him, but hey he has always been this way. The older he gets the worse he gets about it though, and I do find it sickening. There has never been no such thing as "Freedom of Speech" around him.
1 person likes this
@slund2041 (3314)
• United States
4 May 16
I am not going to cut off contact with him, because it would only hurt myself and the rest of my family. I think I will just try to let it go in one ear and out the other. I had been doing that, but he got out of hand this time. Now, he is ticked off with my husband, brother and me.
1 person likes this
@JudyEv (339552)
• Rockingham, Australia
4 May 16
@slund2041 That's a great shame. Sounds like you'll have to be the ones to just listen and let it all slide off.
1 person likes this
@rina110383 (24492)
•
3 May 16
We don't discuss politics or religion at home. I don't discuss those topics either with my friends. Those topics are not my interests and also to further prevent arguments between and among family or friends.
1 person likes this
@slund2041 (3314)
• United States
4 May 16
Those topics are not my interest either. I hate it when it is forced on me.
1 person likes this
@beaniefanatic13 (5076)
• Grand Junction, Colorado
3 May 16
I agree, but the place that I dislike talking about it is at work. I work in a place that it's myself and one other person. We have very different views, he comes in on a daily basis to tell me something that he heard about yesterday and how angry he is. I just nod and smile. He had stopped for a few weeks after not agreeing with something that I said and I was glad for the break. Most of the time I just let him rant, but if he hits a topic that strikes one of my nerves I'm hard to keep quite. I think that over all a time and place, and that wishes should be adhered to when in someone else's home.
@slund2041 (3314)
• United States
4 May 16
I am glad he stopped and allowed you to have a break. In my case this person is so rude they continue on after knowing my husband and I hate it.
1 person likes this
@IvySaysHi (4467)
• United States
3 May 16
I have family members that could get up in arms about religion, but I only rile them up about it when I want a good laugh
1 person likes this
@slund2041 (3314)
• United States
3 May 16
Oh wow! Well at least you start the drama. I hate drama and trying hard to get away from it.
1 person likes this
@ElizabethWallace (12074)
• United States
3 May 16
My sister is unreasonable, not just about politics, but about many things. It is who she is. I accept that. She wants a woman President. This is not because she loves Hillary. She does, but that is because she is a woman. Don't get me wrong, she isn't a feminist. She just hates men. She has been married to a lovely guy, whom she adores, for over fifty years, but he is the only man she likes. She tolerates male medical personnel, but really despises the rest.
For this reason, I cannot discuss anything substantive with her. I mentioned that Bernie is helping Hillary draw young people into the election, but she doesn't care. She still hates him. After all, he's male. Sigh. I agree with you. Do not discuss politics or anything of the sort with family. That way lies madness.
1 person likes this