suggestions needed ASAP !
By Shivani Pal
@PalSheena (222)
May 5, 2016 2:13am CST
I m in a situation. There was this guy who kind of liked me ,was trying to contact me and asked me out a couple of times. But even after my constant resistance he was bothering me for like an year(this happened like 2 years ago).i used to feel like he is some kind of psychopath LOL.
Recently, i got to know that my friend(who is not that a close friend as of now) is in a relationship with him for an year or so and they are planning to get married.
When that guy got to know about this (that i m his girlfriend's friend) ,he contacted me again and begged not to tell her anything as it might create problems in their lives.
but as a friend i feel she should know this. But what if i end up messing her up love life ? i really don't want that ofcourse!!
what should i really do ?
7 people like this
17 responses
@RashmiRk (31)
• India
5 May 16
I think you should talk with your friend once and know how is that guy now and how is their relationship going. Then if you come to know that he is not good with her in anyway, then you should tell your friend about him. You have mentioned that she is not your close friend but she is your friend. And you should do this to your friend. At least you should try. Otherwise, in future it there will be any problem in your friend's life, you will have regret that it won't happen if I have warned her.
1 person likes this
@magallon (19279)
• Philippines
5 May 16
Is that guy still courting you or just contacted you to beg not to say or tell anything about the past?
I think he really don't want their relationship to become a mess and want this to preserve for life.
Maybe you can talk first with your friend, gather information about them both.Then if you find out that their relationship is going on smoothly and their feelings for each other is real, that's the time that you can decide on what to do.
1 person likes this
@PalSheena (222)
•
5 May 16
yeah he just contacted me and pleaded. yea maybe i can try that.
thanx a lot !
1 person likes this
@toniganzon (72281)
• Philippines
5 May 16
You didn't have a relationship with that guy. If your friend is happy let her be. She deserves to be happy. Not unless that guy is just trying to fool your friend then you have every right to destroy their relationship. But with the given facts above, it's better not to interfere with their relationship.
@toniganzon (72281)
• Philippines
5 May 16
@PalSheena he WAS bothering you then. He's not bothering you now. That's the big difference.
@PalSheena (222)
•
5 May 16
But i feel that , that guy was really bothering me which is not a good sign. i used to think of him as a really annoying and disturbed person. i wouldnt really want her to be with someone like him.
but again i have no idea how is he now? maybe he has changed , maybe not !
@PalSheena (222)
•
5 May 16
@toniganzon yaa i agree but tells him about his personality(which my friend must not be aware of)
1 person likes this
@CrazyAnimaLady (279)
• United States
5 May 16
Oh this is a tough one. If you think he's a danger to her or going to make her miserable then a warning is the least that you can do. Maybe just tell her and then let her have her own choices. He obviously realizes what he did two years ago is bad because he's telling you not to tell.
1 person likes this
@Sparklesnthings (58)
•
5 May 16
I think that you should just leave it alone. That happened a few years ago, as long as he doesn't try to talk to you again, I would just let them be happy.
1 person likes this
@deafdiva (242)
• United States
5 May 16
I would talk to your friend and get more information and then go from there!
@PalSheena (222)
•
5 May 16
but what if he has changed and maybe he is a good guy for my friend. what if i end up spoiling it al between them just because of a thing which happened 2 years back but have no significance now ?
@Dextoi (1845)
• Philippines
5 May 16
@PalSheena still, ignore him... there are other guys out there... i'm sure
@PalSheena (222)
•
5 May 16
@Dextoi there are other guys out there ? hahaha i suppose you didnt really understand the situation
but thankyou anyways :)
@sabashekh (1218)
• Bhopal, India
5 May 16
I think you should talk to your best friend ... N explain her ... Next will be her decision ... If you won't tell her then may be in future he will leave your friend for another girl ...
@PalSheena (222)
•
5 May 16
she is really not that a good friend now that's why i m dubious as i dont know how will she take this
@sonesh1 (177)
• Bangalore, India
5 May 16
You should not do anything and let them live their life... Trust me ! That guy liked you once, he was not in a relationship with you. I am not even sure why that guy is begging you.... .He didn't do anything wrong.
@toniganzon (72281)
• Philippines
5 May 16
I'm with you on this one. He was just a foolishly in love when he was pursuing her. And now that someone paid attention to his love, he deserves to be happy with that.
@Decgirl (291)
•
5 May 16
hope that guy stopped bothering you once he got into a relationship with that new girl . so that means he has moved on. Now he called u only to plead u not to inform that girl about his past. So it means he s not completely true to that girl.
I think a relationship should be made out of complete trust and promise. So see to that he is not cheating on that girl. If the boy talks to you again ask himself to tell his girlfriend that he knew you before and you rejected him. I think that ll be better for both the sides. Otherwise you talk to your friend about it. At least she should know that there was some sort of contact between you both and it no longer exists.
@Alexandra1811 (43)
• Portugal
5 May 16
I think you should not say anything to your friend. May be this guy has changed and stopped act strangely (like a psychopath, how you say).
But if you worry too much about this situation, try to warn her, but did not really tell the truth.
@Adilzargar (399)
•
6 May 16
well..!! everybody has a past or dirty past.. and sometimes it helps us and if its dirty thn of course create mess in some part of life.. but LIFE MOVES ON. my suggestion would be to let go, and not to inform your friend about it as of now as that might create some problem in the relation that they share.. everybody deserves a second chance.
@pufitzamison (626)
• Romania
5 May 16
If they wan't to get married that meens that they love each other, that he passed over you and he find finally his love. So i thinck that you must not tell her anything and let them in peace to live theyr love.
