I May Have Gotten Through To Her...
By patgalca
@patgalca (18370)
Orangeville, Ontario
June 3, 2016 3:17pm CST
Even if temporarily.
My daughter works for an airlines. Because of that she gets free flights. She and her boyfriend are going to Europe tomorrow for 2 weeks. When she got home from work today I said, "Hey, are you excited?"
She mumbled, "Not really?"
I carried on about how could she not be excited, she's been planning this for awhile. "Did you have a bad day at work?" I added. "No."
So I said, "You just don't want to talk to me. What else is new?" and I walked away. She went upstairs and changed, then went downstairs to get something to eat from the freezer. As she came back up she said to me, "Want some pizza, girlfriend?"
Well, that was a sudden change in attitude. I decided to keep the conversation going and talked to her about something else, and then about the air conditioner. She normally would have grumbled at me, like she did when she first walked in, but she continued to talk to me about it in a friendly manner.
What is wrong with this 23rd year old who is always acting like a moody teenager? Hopefully I got through to her with my comment and it sticks. If it doesn't, I'll have to remember to use it again.
9 people like this
10 responses
@spiderdust (14760)
• San Jose, California
3 Jun 16
It's possible that she was just tired and overwhelmed from work. Also, just because she's a few years into adulthood doesn't mean that she's grown up yet... moody teen years can last a while.
3 people like this
@patgalca (18370)
• Orangeville, Ontario
3 Jun 16
We know when she has had a bad day at work. She comes in cursing and swearing and telling us what went on that has her in a tizzy. Besides, I asked her if she had a bad day at work and she said no and laughed.
I think more than anything she doesn't want to be living here.
1 person likes this
@ElusiveButterfly (45940)
• United States
3 Jun 16
I hope she wakes up and smells the coffee. Sounds like she is treating you like a stranger than her mother.
2 people like this
@ElusiveButterfly (45940)
• United States
3 Jun 16
@patgalca my husband would not allow that. He is not afraid to stand up and say "enough." They are not his children, but I am his wife. My children are adults too.
2 people like this
@patgalca (18370)
• Orangeville, Ontario
3 Jun 16
It's hurtful to see how friendly she is to strangers and she treats me so disrespectfully. I told my husband a looooonnng time ago that HE shouldn't allow the kids to speak to me "that way". My father always told us not to talk to our mother in a certain way, to have respect for her. My husband's father was a drunk and never participated in any form of parenting as far as I can tell. You live what you learn.
2 people like this
@patgalca (18370)
• Orangeville, Ontario
4 Jun 16
@ElusiveButterfly Yeah, well, my husband has been high for 30 years so he has never disciplined our kids in any way.
1 person likes this
@GardenGerty (160708)
• United States
3 Jun 16
Sometimes they do not even know what they sound like and need to be reminded.
2 people like this
@patgalca (18370)
• Orangeville, Ontario
3 Jun 16
I think it's more the fact that she has gotten away with talking to me like that forever and doesn't think about how wrong it is. She is very nasty to her boyfriend when they are fighting and I am appalled. He puts up with it. She gets away with it so she continues to behave that way. That's normal, right?
2 people like this
@patgalca (18370)
• Orangeville, Ontario
4 Jun 16
@hereandthere To be honest, he is a lot like her Dad (A LOT like him), and she is probably a lot like me.
1 person likes this
@hereandthere (45645)
• Philippines
4 Jun 16
@patgalca i admire the bf's patience
1 person likes this
@sunrisefan (28524)
• Philippines
3 Jun 16
It really hurts a parent when a son or daughter acts the way your daughter initially acted.
2 people like this
@patgalca (18370)
• Orangeville, Ontario
3 Jun 16
Yeah, it hurts, especially when you've given your whole life to those kids and been there for them and tried to never deny them anything. People say she'll learn when she becomes a parent but really, that's not right. It shouldn't take her that long to realize how thankful she should be to have me as her mother.
2 people like this
@sunrisefan (28524)
• Philippines
3 Jun 16
@patgalca I, and many others, can relate with you :)
1 person likes this
@patgalca (18370)
• Orangeville, Ontario
3 Jun 16
No, I don't think she's hiding something. I think she is used to treating me that way AND I don't think she wants to be living here anymore. She doesn't want to come home and have to face me every day. So many people say they will learn when they become parents but as true as that may be, it's not right.
1 person likes this
@shivamani10 (11035)
• Hyderabad, India
23 Jun 16
It seems she is talks to you when she wants something. Is it good?
@OKennedy (1130)
• United States
3 Jun 16
There are hundreds of reasons for having a irritable demeanor just let her be for now and maybe she will come around on her own. I however would be stoked to be able to fly for free but its not a luxury I have afforded to me so I will have to be happy with what I am able to do.
@OKennedy (1130)
• United States
4 Jun 16
@patgalca I wasn't aware this was a common problem with you two. I am sorry to hear that. Maybe some professional help. I honestly don't really know how I would handle such a problem I haven't been in that situation. Best wishes I hope it changes for the positive.
1 person likes this
