Tomorrow People will Understand

Flowers from our younger son's fiancé's parents
@DianneN (247186)
United States
June 8, 2016 8:13am CST
Tomorrow our family will be together to say our final goodbyes to my husband's brother, Bernie, in Manhattan, where he lived most of his life. That is, all except our oldest son. He is on a business trip in the Bahamas for his law firm. He is presenting to attorneys from all over the world, of which I am proud, and will be involved in panel discussions. He had his secretary try to get him out of the Bahamas to attend his uncle's funeral tomorrow, but the flights did not work out time wise. He called us last night, quite distraught. We comforted him by reminding him of the fact that he, on his own, went to the hospital with Bernie's wife, just so she wouldn't have to be alone when she spoke to the doctors about removing the respirator that kept Bernie alive. He was there to say his good byes, took his aunt home in a cab, and stopped by with dinner for her from her favorite eatery, Zabar's, later in the evening. I'm sure people will understand.
40 people like this
33 responses
@Juliaacv (51103)
• Canada
8 Jun 16
I have no doubt that people will understand, and that this must be very upsetting for your son. He's done all that he can to show respect to his aunt in her time of need, and she would understand that sometimes these things cannot be avoided.
5 people like this
@Juliaacv (51103)
• Canada
8 Jun 16
@DianneN Sadly it sounds like she may just have reacted out of exhaustion and emotion from losing her beloved husband who she's cared for during his illness. That cannot be an easy place for someone to be in, but difficult for your son as well. People will understand, and his Aunt probably does, but maybe she had difficulty conveying it thru her grief.
5 people like this
@Juliaacv (51103)
• Canada
8 Jun 16
@DianneN I cannot imagine how she feels. Every relationship is unique, and they obviously communicated at great lengths to come to this decision, yet as a loving wife, I myself, cannot imagine how my heart would feel. I think that she must be a very very brave and loving woman to be able to go thru this, I'm thinking and praying for you all.
1 person likes this
@DianneN (247186)
• United States
8 Jun 16
@Juliaacv That is what we told him. I can't wait for this to be over. We're going with our younger son and picking Aunt up, so she doesn't have to go alone. She is mentally and physically distraught over everything.
4 people like this
@hereandthere (45645)
• Philippines
8 Jun 16
it was so good of him to do all that.
4 people like this
@DianneN (247186)
• United States
8 Jun 16
He is a good and caring kid. I agree.
2 people like this
@Marcyaz (35316)
• United States
8 Jun 16
Your son has no reason to be distraughtas he went to the hospital with his Aunt so she wouldn't be alone when it was time to take the Uncle off the respirator. He certainly did all he could do in this time. If someone doesn't understand then that is their problem. Condolences to you and the family.
3 people like this
@DianneN (247186)
• United States
8 Jun 16
Thank you. It has been a crummy time for us.
@allknowing (136089)
• India
9 Jun 16
Your son was there for his Aunt to help her in those last moments. That is more than enough.
3 people like this
@DianneN (247186)
• United States
9 Jun 16
He did good by her. Thank you.
2 people like this
@BelleStarr (61102)
• United States
9 Jun 16
He did the important things that needed to be done at the time they were needed, that is more important than being there tomorrow but I know how hard it is not to be able to be there for the gathering. I am sending you a hug before you go to say the final goodbye.
3 people like this
@DianneN (247186)
• United States
9 Jun 16
Sniff, sniff. Thank you so much.
2 people like this
@Lucky15 (37374)
• Philippines
8 Jun 16
I know they will. Efforts has been made.
2 people like this
@DianneN (247186)
• United States
11 Jun 16
@Lucky15 Unfortunately, they can be. Shame on them!
1 person likes this
@DianneN (247186)
• United States
8 Jun 16
Thank you, but people are people.
1 person likes this
@Lucky15 (37374)
• Philippines
8 Jun 16
@DianneN and judgemental ;(
2 people like this
@MGjhaud (23240)
• Philippines
8 Jun 16
im sure everyone will understand. and at least he was able to say goodbye already.. my sincere condolence to the entire family again.
2 people like this
@DianneN (247186)
• United States
8 Jun 16
I hope so and thank you. It's been an awful time for us.
1 person likes this
@Tampa_girl7 (50205)
• United States
9 Jun 16
I am sure they will all understand. My thoughts will be with your family tomorrow.
2 people like this
@DianneN (247186)
• United States
9 Jun 16
Thank you so much, Marie.
@hostessman (11871)
• Tucson, Arizona
8 Jun 16
ife isn't alway easy to cope with. somethings just don't work out.will say a prayer for Bernie and may he R.I.P.
2 people like this
@DianneN (247186)
• United States
8 Jun 16
Thank you for the prayer for Bernie. I truly appreciate it. No, life is never easy, but it beats the alternative.
@amnabas (14044)
• Karachi, Pakistan
8 Jun 16
He seems to be a great achiever.
2 people like this
@Jdaw1985 (3967)
• Harrells, North Carolina
9 Jun 16
I am sure that they will. Some things just can not be helped. I know he will feel bad for not being there but he will be able to go to the wifes house as soon as he gets back.
2 people like this
@Jdaw1985 (3967)
• Harrells, North Carolina
9 Jun 16
@DianneN Yes it really can. And not fair at times. But I feel that if god meant for him to be there then he would have been able to get there.
1 person likes this
@DianneN (247186)
• United States
9 Jun 16
I'm sure he will. Life can be so tough.
@just4him (317040)
• Green Bay, Wisconsin
8 Jun 16
I'm sure they will too. I know it will be hard for your family. My condolences to all.
2 people like this
@just4him (317040)
• Green Bay, Wisconsin
10 Jun 16
@DianneN I knew they would.
1 person likes this
@JudyEv (339557)
• Rockingham, Australia
8 Jun 16
I'm sure people will understand too. I am sorry you have lost your brother-in-law.
2 people like this
@DianneN (247186)
• United States
8 Jun 16
Thank you. It's been a very sad time for us all.
1 person likes this
@miniam (9154)
• Bern, Switzerland
8 Jun 16
Im sure people will understand,there are some commitments we can not get away from nomatter how hard we try. Dianne im with you guys in prayers.
2 people like this
@DianneN (247186)
• United States
11 Jun 16
They all understood and thank you so much. It's been an awfully sad week for us.
1 person likes this
@miniam (9154)
• Bern, Switzerland
11 Jun 16
@DianneN Im sure things will get better with time.Bernie is now out of pain and suffering.
1 person likes this
• United States
8 Jun 16
God bless his heart. People will understand his not being able to attend. If they don't, it is on them and not him. My condolences to you and the family for your loss.
1 person likes this
@DianneN (247186)
• United States
8 Jun 16
Thank you. He did more than what was expected of him. Their loss is right!
1 person likes this
• United States
8 Jun 16
@DianneN being there for his aunt in her time of need was huge.
1 person likes this
@DianneN (247186)
• United States
8 Jun 16
@ElusiveButterfly We told him that and believe that is what finally made him feel better.
1 person likes this
@SIMPLYD (90722)
• Philippines
9 Jun 16
I am sure they will , knowing that your son who is now a part of a famous law firm has many things to attend to . Besides , he had his time with him when before his life support was finally terminated . In additon he has accompanied his wife in her most grievous hour.
1 person likes this
@SIMPLYD (90722)
• Philippines
11 Jun 16
@DianneN Your Uncle Bernie is lucky to have a nephew so caring of him
1 person likes this
• Valdosta, Georgia
9 Jun 16
I am sure people will understand too. Sometimes there is nothing we can do to change things-especially when it comes to work. I'm sorry for the loss of your husband's brother. =(
1 person likes this
• Valdosta, Georgia
11 Jun 16
@DianneN Your welcome. I'm glad it went as well as possible and I am also glad your son's presentation went well. =) That was so nice of him to check on his dad, shows what a sweet person he is-you did a good job raising him!
1 person likes this
@rebelann (112780)
• El Paso, Texas
12 Jun 16
Definitely understand, it must have been so heartbreaking to have to go through with something like that as well as courageous. Both are admirable for having the courage to do that and it must have been a blessing to have your son there with her to keep her from falling apart. Will she be living alone now or does she have a sibling with whom she can live?
1 person likes this
@rebelann (112780)
• El Paso, Texas
14 Jun 16
Thank goodness she has family and friends to help her through all of the heartache and guilt she must be feeling @DianneN
1 person likes this
@DianneN (247186)
• United States
14 Jun 16
Thank you for your kind words. She will live alone amongst her friends and family in Manhattan. Next month she will spend a month in Minnesota visiting her brother and his wife and children, and I'm sure, her childhood friends.
1 person likes this
@DianneN (247186)
• United States
14 Jun 16
@rebelann Definitely. My son and wife are having her over for dinner, too.
1 person likes this
@amadeo (111938)
• United States
8 Jun 16
I do not want to be on any machine.Not sure why people hang on in doing this.
2 people like this
@paigea (36317)
• Canada
9 Jun 16
I am so sorry for your loss. Take care. I am sure everyone will know that your son has done all he can.
1 person likes this