The Jist

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And so after a few weeks (months...?) on hiatus, The Jist is back perusing the headlines for the biggest and best bullshit on the Net. Sooo... in a strange twist for bad boy Chris Brown: Apparently, he is a good dad. Or so a judge thinks in a recent case brought forth by his baby Royalty's mama. Yes, the child's name is Royalty... no props for that one, Chris. But we will give major props for his epic win against an apparently gold-digging ex. The ex wanted full custody, 16 grand a month in child support, supervised visitation for Chris, aannndd.... no rights to Grandma (Chris' mom) to see the child. ALL DENIED by the judge... well done. Now, Chris... let's see what you got as a celebrity daddy. Sad news for Criminal Minds fans. As if the departure of one of TVs best eye candy (Shemar Moore) wasn't bad enough, now Thomas Gibson has been handed his walking papers. It appears Thomas is not as calm and mild-mannered as his character on the show. A disagreement with a producer turned violent and Gibson was fired on the spot. This story is not finished; Gibson has sought counsel. The show will NOT be the same without him. Period. But enough with the celebrity crap; The Jist is not TMZ. Nor do we talk politics... we leave that to the syndicated and reputable news sources like NBC, Fox, CNN and CBS. Cough, cough!! It seems racism is not just an American tradition; in China a laundry detergent company aired an advert showing a Chinese woman putting an African man into a washer. The dude comes out as a clean and shiny Chinese man. WHAT WERE THEY THINKING...?!?! The ad has been pulled, an apology has been issued by the offending company, and the headlines are now asking just how racist is China...? In a recent study by the American Sociological Review it was determined that, among other things, a leading cause of divorce among couples was the husband having a job. That's right, you heard me: unemployed men incur a greater chance of facing divorce than those who bring home the bacon. Who knew?? The study, which covered a period dating back to the 70s, revealed a 3.3% chance of divorce within the first year among unemployed men, compared to a 2.5% chance among men who had a full-time job. The saddest part about this story is that there is a 95% chance that your tax dollars paid for at least 50% of this research. Happy wife, happy life... this entails husband having a job. We just hope this isn't really news to men out there reading this. Meanwhile, over in Kentucky, a mother is looking at jail time after just trying to be a good mom to her child. Well, perhaps an enabler: Kimberly Mullins has been sentenced to more than 18 years in prison. For providing drugs to her beloved daughter. Who was also in prison. And is now dead, from overdosing on what the mom thought was heroin. Which said mother smuggled into the prison for her daughter. Who is now dead. There really should be an exam of some sort required before people are allowed to procreate. That's a small op-ed from The Jist. We have just three words for Orlando Bloom and Katy Perry: Get a room! And that's the Jist for August 14, 2016. As always, thanks for reading... and of course, stay calm and be nice.