Not Ready to Face Reality
@BettyB (4117)
Summerville, South Carolina
September 7, 2016 7:29am CST
My mother-in-law has been with us for three weeks now. I figured it was time to do some shifting around so we could give her a little more room.
The spare bedroom was my craft room. There’s a bed in there but it wasn’t a ‘bedroom’. We took the twin bed out of my computer room and moved my craft stuff in there, and then I went out in search of a dresser.
I didn’t want to buy an expensive dresser so I checked the two Goodwill stores in the area, Big Lots and finally found what I wanted at Habitat for Humanity.
I thought Jean had accepted the fact that she probably would not be allowed to move back home, alone. It’s not just the physical ailments. Her memory is going. Letting her move back home would be extremely dangerous.
Well, the dresser seemed to flip a switch. She refuses to put her clothes in it as she’s ‘only staying a few days.’ It will probably be another month before the dresser is actually used.
24 people like this
24 responses
@BelleStarr (61101)
• United States
8 Sep 16
I know that my mother would have never willingly moved to my house and out of her house. I hope that your mother in law can accept this situation. Have the doctors given her any medication to help with the memory issues?
1 person likes this
@BettyB (4117)
• Summerville, South Carolina
8 Sep 16
She knows we're doing what's best for her and deep down she knows she will not be going home again. If pretending she will eventually go home eases her mind, I'm not going to fight it. Telling her maybe next week seems to satisfy her.
1 person likes this
@crazyhorseladycx (39509)
• United States
8 Sep 16
'tis diff'cult fer folks to let go 'f their independence :( i feel fer her deeply. that's a beautiful dresser 'n no doubt she'll warm 'p to 't soon...when she's ready. big hugs!
1 person likes this
@sueznewz2 (10409)
• Alicante, Spain
9 Sep 16
It's a difficult time for you all...hopefully if your mother in law has memory problems ..she may have forgotten by tomorrow and put some of her clothes and bits in it... it's a nice set of drawers..., glad you got it for a good price ...
1 person likes this
@BettyB (4117)
• Summerville, South Carolina
9 Sep 16
Physically she's doing very well. The excess fluid is coming off. It's her memory that will keep her from going home.
@BettyB (4117)
• Summerville, South Carolina
9 Sep 16
I like the dresser and don't regret buying it. She's put a few things in there. That's a start.
@Happy2BeMe (99380)
• Canada
7 Sep 16
It is hard for them to admit that they can no longer take care of themselves. It is sad when they get older. I hope she comes to term with things soon and realizes what is best for her.
1 person likes this
@Macarrosel (7498)
• Philippines
7 Sep 16
That's sad. I'm sorry to hear about your mother in law's illness.
1 person likes this
@BettyB (4117)
• Summerville, South Carolina
8 Sep 16
A nurse comes in to check on her three times a week. That helps.
@BettyB (4117)
• Summerville, South Carolina
7 Sep 16
It's been okay, mostly. Sometimes I think its better she thinks she can go home again. I'm afraid she'll slip into a depression once the truth really sinks in. She's a very independent woman.
@acelawrites (19272)
• Philippines
7 Sep 16
It's a sad part of aging; specially memory loss; really threatening.
1 person likes this
@BettyB (4117)
• Summerville, South Carolina
8 Sep 16
I often wonder who will take care of me when its my turn. Its kind of scary. My sons are wonderful but I don't think either one of them could handle it.
