What do older people really want?
@PatZAnthony (14749)
Charlotte, North Carolina
December 17, 2016 10:28am CST
Do you think you know what older people really want? Are we going to put them all in one pile and say they all want the same thing?
A recent post here by Patsie Hatley @Hatley had me commenting that at my age I see some trying to plan my life according to my age category. That article by Patsie Hatley is shared below my post.
This seems to start at around 40. Many have had all of the children they are going to by then, and it seems we get shoved into a new category.
We can blame this on the government, but it is actually us allowing this.
Who has the right to say how we should live and where you will be allowed to live because you are 40, 50, 60?
With children, without children? With a spouse, without a spouse? Fat or skinny? Tall or short? White or black or mixed or yellow or ??? Chrisitan, Jew, Muslim, Buddist?
Younger people better get ready! It will happen to all of us, all of you. We are allowing ourselves to be classified.
Where will you be allowed to live when you get 'older' and are seen as someone who has to be 'placed' somewhere?
Retioremet center store us old codgers' We wart toi be wity others our own kind' BS thats is not what we want at all We want to b e home with famlly We want...
29 people like this
32 responses
@LadyDuck (472305)
• Switzerland
17 Dec 16
In some ancient populations old people were praised, they were the memories, they had a lot to teach to the others. The so called "civilized men" have decided differently. What I cannot understand is why we call ourselves "advanced civilizations".
6 people like this
@PatZAnthony (14749)
• Charlotte, North Carolina
21 Dec 16
@LadyDuck That is true.
2 people like this
@asfarasiknow (3340)
• Bournemouth, England
17 Dec 16
I give talks to groups, usually ranging in age from their 60s to their 90s and see people from a wide range of backgrounds, full of life, enthusiasm and interests. I speak about comedy and one of their biggest gripes is about how overlooked they feel when it comes to broadcast entertainment, so much of which is aimed at 16 - 34 year-olds - despite the ever-increasing, ageing demographic.
4 people like this
@PatZAnthony (14749)
• Charlotte, North Carolina
17 Dec 16
It is a disgrace to us that so many are overlooked. We have friends in their 80s and 90s who have so much to share. They could teach so much if they would be allowed to SPEAK to someone, somewhere.
2 people like this
@asfarasiknow (3340)
• Bournemouth, England
17 Dec 16
@PatZAnthony It is only when they are gone that we think of all those things we could have asked about - and there is often nowhere else to find those answers.
2 people like this
@dragon54u (31634)
• United States
17 Dec 16
I agree!! I have a completely different set of morals and a different sense of humor than people in their 20s. A young person in my family insists I watch something funny and I see nothing funny in it. They say I'll like such and such a show and I find it boring, shallow, and completely predictable.
4 people like this
@rusty2rusty (6763)
• Defiance, Ohio
17 Dec 16
In my area, if family won't take care of you, and you have money, you go to a nursing home. Otherwise if you don;t own your own home. you end up living in apartments for the elderly.
4 people like this
@PainsOnSlate (21852)
• Canada
17 Dec 16
I have a home and hope it will be mine until I chose to leave it. My daughter has already said, if I out live hubby, I can live with her when I'm ready...I don't know where that came from but she means it...
4 people like this
@PatZAnthony (14749)
• Charlotte, North Carolina
21 Dec 16
Most do mean well and offer a space when it is needed. Many just don't want to leave their own home.
2 people like this
@MarshaMusselman (38864)
• Midland, Michigan
22 Dec 16
So, Marilyn, if your hubby were to out-live you does that mean your daughter wouldn't want to house him as well?
2 people like this
@PainsOnSlate (21852)
• Canada
22 Dec 16
@MarshaMusselman I'm sure she would ask but I think my husband is a loner.... and his businesses s are here where we live. i have no idea if I would leave either...I'll know when and if it happens...
3 people like this
@PatZAnthony (14749)
• Charlotte, North Carolina
21 Dec 16
That is a good way to put it.
1 person likes this
@fishtiger58 (29820)
• Momence, Illinois
18 Dec 16
I sure hope my kids don't place me when I'm old
4 people like this
@dragon54u (31634)
• United States
17 Dec 16
I don't want to be in a nursing home and probably won't be because I can't afford it. I will probably end up with one of my sons but I worry about what having a boarder will do to their relationships with their wives. What I really want is to die before I can't afford to live on my own. I'm 62, had a decent life, and I'm satisfied that I've done my best. I don't want to live to be really old.
Medical science and the attitude that we should save lives at all costs no matter what the quality of life is part of the problem. We live so long nowadays that our brains wear out and we lose our minds. Then we are stored in nursing homes and die of neglect. They give kidney and heart transplants to people in their 60s, 70s, and even their 80s--that is insane! Let the young people have the organs, they haven't had a chance at life yet while the elders have had a chance to live a life. We prolong life just to prolong it and now we're paying for it financially and families are suffering, struggling to find a way to cope with old, sick family members that they can't manage. They won't let old, sick people die and that is not fair to anyone.
You probably think I'm a monster, advocating to let people die and saying that young folks should have first dibs on organs for transplant. But it would be better if we let nature take its course after age 50 and quit fighting it.
2 people like this
@PatZAnthony (14749)
• Charlotte, North Carolina
17 Dec 16
For me, those wanting to die should be allowed to do so. However, until that time comes, it seems some of the medical choices made out there are a little off.
We know several 'older people' (in their 70s and 80s) who are sharing space. This works for many. Everyone has a room, share the kitchen, stay out of nursing homes.
2 people like this
@dragon54u (31634)
• United States
17 Dec 16
@PatZAnthony That may be something I will be doing in a few years.
3 people like this
@SIMPLYD (90721)
• Philippines
22 Dec 16
Good thing , here in the Philippines , the government doesn't have that kind of ruling . Here , any of the children can have their parents with them as long as they live . They take care of them and they are well loved until they die . This is one way of how to return the love and care they also gave the children when they were still growing up. 
3 people like this
@PatZAnthony (14749)
• Charlotte, North Carolina
23 Dec 16
It seems people in the Philippines are very concerned and helpful when it comes to older ones.
3 people like this
@Letranknight2015 (52186)
• Philippines
18 Dec 16
I will eat vegetables as long as i could. The only regret is that I didn't get to do it early back then.
3 people like this
@AbbyGreenhill (45494)
• United States
17 Dec 16
No one has every told me where to live or how to live and I'm way older than 50. I don't buy into all that - maybe when I'm 90 (if I make it there) someone can put me in a home if that's where I need to be. Since I have no kids or much family the only one who could put me somewhere is my husband, who is older than me
3 people like this
@PatZAnthony (14749)
• Charlotte, North Carolina
21 Dec 16
Those who have been placed by the system or their family did not buy into it either. It happens all the time. People think they have more rights than they do.
@AbbyGreenhill (45494)
• United States
21 Dec 16
@PatZAnthony Luckly for us we don't have to worry about that.
1 person likes this
@Tampa_girl7 (50795)
• United States
17 Dec 16
I hope that I can live in my own home.
3 people like this
@garymarsh6 (23412)
• United Kingdom
23 Dec 16
I work mainly with older people 80,90, 100. They are full of wisdom and each one of them have a story to two to tell. They can be outrageous to the point that they don't care what they say. They make me laugh my head off sometimes even making me blush! LOL You are as young as you feel!!! You should do what you want!
2 people like this
@PatZAnthony (14749)
• Charlotte, North Carolina
25 Dec 16
Yes, people should do what they want. Here it does not always work this way. Often family or government agencies do what they choose to older people.
2 people like this
@PatZAnthony (14749)
• Charlotte, North Carolina
21 Dec 16
This is why some we know share space. One owns the home, but everyone has space that is their own. Reminds me of 'Golden Girls' but w/o the fancy house, etc.
1 person likes this
@MarshaMusselman (38864)
• Midland, Michigan
22 Dec 16
Do you have siblings that would help you out if the situation arose that you needed some type of help, Claudia? It might even be good to check out different facilities and possibly put into writing what you'd prefer if it ever came to that years down the road.
I wouldn't want to still be living in my house at that time because we'd still be responsible for the upkeep and snow plowing, but hopefully it would be ten to twenty years before we'd have to make that decision, although we may want to begin talking about it now, I guess so my husband and I are on the same page concerning this.
1 person likes this
@MarshaMusselman (38864)
• Midland, Michigan
22 Dec 16
@PatZAnthony Do you meant that you know some elderly folks that share housing? Probably they all have their own rooms, but share the main part of the house and the bathrooms? Did the owner already have a service that covered lawn care and snow removal if they're in a snowy area before the rest moved in? Hopefully, they all also have family that live nearby that visit and make sure they're all well taken care of?
1 person likes this
@Fishmomma (11377)
• United States
17 Dec 16
I live in a community with many older people by choice. Yes, my neighbors have wonderful stories to share and we all have lived a long time. Its nice to know there is somebody to talk with and share the afternoon with a cup of coffee or tea.
2 people like this
@lookatdesktop (27138)
• Dallas, Texas
26 Dec 16
You have made a good comment that I can easily relate to. I like your way of thinking.
@allknowing (138562)
• India
18 Dec 16
I am a senior too and live life to the hilt to the extent my body allows me.
2 people like this
@JamesHxstatic (29413)
• Eugene, Oregon
20 Dec 16
We downsized and the place we live is an "over 55" manufactured home community. It is strange never seeing kids walk down streets or ride bikes.
2 people like this
@PatZAnthony (14749)
• Charlotte, North Carolina
21 Dec 16
Yeah, that would seem a little odd not having children around.
2 people like this
@PatZAnthony (14749)
• Charlotte, North Carolina
21 Dec 16
That freedom is lost when someone gets older. Ask anyone living in a care facility.
2 people like this
