This is not an advice..
By Wendy789
@Drosophila (16571)
Ireland
January 7, 2017 12:04pm CST
"This is not an advice. It's merely how I do things."
I've noticed that people often mistakenly thinking I am giving them advice, when I'm merely explaining my thought processes on things.
Often, people would ask "so how you would handle X situation?", I tell them my process, they automatically assume it's advice.
I'd like to clarify, well.. it ain't!
We all deal with situations differently, there's no the right or the wrong way. There's only the way that... well, works or don't work for you.
I can tell you what works for me, but by no means, I assume it will work for you!
So, deploy at your own risk...
Do you ask for advice? Do you give advice? Do you take advice?
21 people like this
20 responses
@moffittjc (121548)
• Gainesville, Florida
7 Jan 17
Yes, to all three of your questions. But if I want advice, I will specifically ask for it. And if I give advice, it's only if somebody else has asked for it. I am always open to receiving advice, because I like to keep an open mind on how I can always improve myself.
3 people like this
@Drosophila (16571)
• Ireland
8 Jan 17
meh.. am done with this "personal improvement DIY" project.
I don't want to be a "better me".. am already the BEST :p
3 people like this
@Drosophila (16571)
• Ireland
9 Jan 17
@moffittjc there's nothing wrong with being content, and as long as you maintain a curiosity to life and a desire to experience diversity, your life will never be stagnant.
That's not the same as working on your self as if it's an old shed, where renovation is a must.
1 person likes this
@moffittjc (121548)
• Gainesville, Florida
8 Jan 17
@Drosophila I just don't want to become complacent in my life, or stagnant.
1 person likes this
@hereandthere (45645)
• Philippines
10 Jan 17
that's why sometimes i just ask them questions instead, either following their line of thinking or hypothesizing about the other person's side
2 people like this
@besweet (9859)
• Ireland
10 Jan 17
Asking questions is effective sometimes.
I have noticed a strange thing: when I am asked for an opinion, I usually have some questions in order to learn the full story. The last question is about the outcome, what they want to achieve by the situation they are into. And most people don't know what they want.
2 people like this
@Drosophila (16571)
• Ireland
10 Jan 17
Right, last time I did that, apparently I ask too many questions lol. People are funny at times
2 people like this
@Drosophila (16571)
• Ireland
11 Jan 17
@besweet hahahaha that is true, I guess i do things differently, I always ask, what am I trying to achieve first. I try not do things just because
2 people like this
@besweet (9859)
• Ireland
9 Jan 17
Interesting topic. I ask very often my friend's opinions on important issues, I find it very interesting to listen how other people would react in the situation that I am facing or the choices that they would make. I usually gather information and eventually take my own decisions, that might be a combination of the individual opinions.
Some people are diplomatic, others are straightforward, but I really enjoy it when people think out of the box and surprise me with their reactions.
I also give my opinion or advice honestly and openly when I am asked.
1 person likes this
@besweet (9859)
• Ireland
10 Jan 17
@Drosophila It's also a good way to evaluate the people around you, and sometimes learn who you can trust.
1 person likes this
@Drosophila (16571)
• Ireland
11 Jan 17
@besweet lol I generally don't trust people and it's been fine
1 person likes this
@Drosophila (16571)
• Ireland
10 Jan 17
I must admit I am slowly coming around to this way of working. I think it's interesting to hear what others would do in a similar situation. Diversity is the key to a good issue resolution
1 person likes this
@BelleStarr (61102)
• United States
10 Jan 17
I rarely ask for advice, only give advice when asked and seldom take advice. I do ask my daughter when I want to know if something looks god (clothing) she and I will be honest with each other.
1 person likes this
@BelleStarr (61102)
• United States
10 Jan 17
@Drosophila lol I trust her to tell me that something doesn't look as good as I think it does!! lol
1 person likes this
@Drosophila (16571)
• Ireland
10 Jan 17
@BelleStarr hahah am sure she'll have no issues doing that
1 person likes this
@Drosophila (16571)
• Ireland
10 Jan 17
Ya that's important to get a different point of view on clothing
1 person likes this
@WorDazza (15830)
• Manchester, England
9 Jan 17
I refuse to accept your advice to deploy your 'advice' at my own risk.
Oh hang on. That wasn't advice was it? That was you saying that deploying your own advice at your own risk works for you but may not necessarily work for me.
So at who's risk should I deploy your advice. If advice is what it was. Which it probably wasn't!!
I'm confused!
1 person likes this
@Drosophila (16571)
• Ireland
9 Jan 17
@WorDazza hahaha I was wondering if this paradox will be caught by anyone. And ofc trust the software engineer to catch it.
Who says anything about you should deploy it at all? Remember that's not my advice
1 person likes this
@mysdianait (66009)
• Italy
11 Jan 17
If someone asks for advice and their situation/problem is something that I have been through then I would explain how I dealt with that circumstance, telling them also that the same might not work for them.
1 person likes this
@Drosophila (16571)
• Ireland
12 Jan 17
Indeed, I think sometimes how we handle people definitely depends on our personalities, so ya there's no point asking a covert communicator to be up front and confrontational.
1 person likes this
@Beatburn (4286)
• Philippines
10 Jan 17
@Drosophila Now that you've mentioned it, people should remember.
1 person likes this
@Drosophila (16571)
• Ireland
10 Jan 17
Indeed, I feel like I should always have this disclaimer in my back pocket
1 person likes this
@AbbyGreenhill (45494)
• United States
7 Jan 17
I don't think I"ve ever assumed you were giving advice...sometimes you do confuse me and I have to question you!!!
1 person likes this
@AbbyGreenhill (45494)
• United States
8 Jan 17
@Drosophila LOL - some things just get 'lost in translation'
1 person likes this
@Drosophila (16571)
• Ireland
8 Jan 17
hahaha, good! it would be odd if you aint got confused at least once..
@Drosophila (16571)
• Ireland
8 Jan 17
right, for example, I wont advice anyone to try to work 2 jobs..
1 person likes this
@just4him (317040)
• Green Bay, Wisconsin
9 Jan 17
@Drosophila That's never wise anyway.
1 person likes this
@Daljinder (23236)
• Bangalore, India
14 Jan 17
You got that right. What worked for me may or may not work for you and vice versa.
1 person likes this
@Drosophila (16571)
• Ireland
14 Jan 17
right.. that goes for everything big 'n' small
1 person likes this
@amandajay (23264)
• New Zealand
9 Jan 17
I rarely ask for advices, I do what I feel is right...
I dont like to give advice either, if somthing went wrong, I dont wanna get the blame...
I take advices only from few people..
1 person likes this
@Drosophila (16571)
• Ireland
10 Jan 17
@amandajay indeed, I always think if you ask me how I do a thing, I can tell you for sure. But that don't mean you should do it too lol
1 person likes this
@Drosophila (16571)
• Ireland
10 Jan 17
That's kinda what I do, except people kept thinking I was advising them lol
1 person likes this
@amandajay (23264)
• New Zealand
10 Jan 17
@Drosophila lol... Thats their problem, not yours.. Dont worry
1 person likes this
@suhail1 (931)
• Manila, Philippines
7 Jan 17
@Drosophila i wont mind who is it from, we all have so much to learn
1 person likes this
@Drosophila (16571)
• Ireland
7 Jan 17
@suhail1 that's definitely an open mind, just beware it might get clogged by unuseful information
@PatZAnthony (14749)
• Charlotte, North Carolina
9 Jan 17
If someone asks for advice, it is okay to say what we think. This does not mean they have to listen to us. We also certainly don't have to listen to them if we don't like what advice they give us.
1 person likes this
@jillybean1222 (6407)
•
8 Jan 17
i guess i don't often ask for advice. I've given advice before i suppose. And i'm sure have taken advice as well.
1 person likes this
@Drosophila (16571)
• Ireland
8 Jan 17
That sounds cool, a give and take approach
1 person likes this
@JudyEv (339591)
• Rockingham, Australia
7 Jan 17
I might ask what others would do in my situation but if I'm asked I usually end up saying 'but that's just my way' or whatever. Some people get pretty sensitive and think a person is being critical when they don't mean to be at all.
1 person likes this
@vindhya93 (98)
•
8 Jan 17
Nope. I prefer to not give FREE advice. Sometimes,they cost you your self-esteem.....
1 person likes this
@diosabella (4789)
•
8 Jan 17
I still ask for advice or guidance sometimes. Its up to me if I'm taking it or not.But about giving advice, I just give it to people who I really know and matter. Its hard to give advice to a stranger. I could give more of a guideline because Im not really sure the real situation.
1 person likes this
