Love, Death, Euthanasia, and Sedation

Tweet

Last May of this year, my father and mother-in-law passed away. Both of them died on the same day at four-hour difference. My mother-in-law was diagnosed with colorectal cancer last 2014 and the doctor told her that she only has few months left. But, despite of what the doctor said, she was able to live up to May of this year. That was due to the fact that the husband really searched and searched for options to keep his wife for a longer time. His wife started to undergo chemotherapy and had also undergone HIPEC. She got better after the operation and as far as I know the doctor told her that she is out of cancer after the operation. Then last year 2016 she started to feel sick. She went back to the doctor and the doctor told her that her cancer cells has spread to her liver to her lungs and so on. She started chemotherapy and continued to get weaker. The chemotherapy was not good enough for her and the doctor told her that there are no options, and was advised that she can submit herself for cancer research medications, which made her more weaker. While she started to get weaker, the husband started to get sick last October 2016 and was brought to the hospital due to vomiting. At the hospital, he was given meds and said that it was nothing. Then somewhere this early 2017, he vomited and vomited again and was brought again to the hospital. That time, they made some test, and now he also was diagnosed with cancer (location of the tumor was between the liver, bile ducts, and pancreas). The doctor said he is going to be operated for it. We waited for his operation time which was supposed to be last May 17, 2016. On the same month, my mother-in-law can no longer eat well, she pukes whatever she eats. So, she decided to undergo sedation. One day before the sedation, I saw how hard my father-in-law cried and cried, because once the sedation starts, my mother-in-law will die in three days after the sedation. He was really crying and I can see the sadness and pain in his eyes. Early morning of the sedation, the doctor ,who is going to operate him called and told him that, his case is inoperable and he only has six months left. With that, he decided to be sedated and go at the same day as with my mother-in-law. He also asked to undergo Euthanasia if the sedation does not work on him. So the lawyer came, asked him questions, and assessed if he is qualified for Euthanasia. He was qualified and was expected to be euthanized after three days. He said that if his wife goes, he goes. So on May 12, 2017, around 7pm the doctor arrived at their house and sedated that two of them while they were holding their hands. It was really a very sad moment. But since my father-in-law was so strong he keeps waking up from the sedation. They keep titrating the sedative raising it up and raising it up but he still wakes up. Not the same as with my mother-in-law. She stayed on the same level of sedative. She just continued breathing and continued gasping air. And on May 13, 2017 at around 2:00pm, my mother-in-law stopped breathing and continued to leave earth.. At that time, my father-in-law was not yet awake. But after around 1 hour he woke up and he asked why is he not hearing the breathing of his wife. He was informed that she went away already. Despite being under sedation, he insisted to stand up to hug her and kiss her. He keeps crying and was saying that he loves her so much. At that time, we were all crying. Then he started to calm down and still so groggy. He was placed back to lying position and the nurses increased his sedative. At that time, the nurses called the doctor and informed her that my mother-in-law went away, thus she can do the euthanasia. She came after around 3 to 4 hours after the death of my mother-in-law. My father-in-law was groggy and can still communicate and respond to questions, the doctor told him that she is going to give the medication already, and he just said, kill me. And the doctor initiated the Euthanasia and in just one minute to two, he passed away.