Out of Place

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I was invited to a birthday party and I was hesitant to attend simply because: 1. The Celebrant was not a close friend of mine. 2. We just met a week ago. 3. I'm not a party goer. But... we have 3 common friends and it so happen that these three are one of my closests friends. Despite my uneasiness in accepting the invitation, these three friends of mine were able to convinced me to attend. With the idea of four of us attending the party was enough to change my mind and happily, bought a birthday present. Come party day. One friend informed me an hour before that she couldn't make it through text message as there was an urgent she needs to attend to. I called the two friends to confirm if they were still attending but they're not answering my call. "Probably they're at the venue already." I thought to myself. I went as planned and found out that I was the only one attending. The host (Birthday celebrant) was kind of surprised to find me there! She thought that I won't be coming since my three friends had declined the invitation. I know I was red with embarassment and felt awkward. But the Host was nice and she made me want to feel like I'm welcomed to her party. I looked around and I don't know one single guest. I stayed for about forty minutes and tried myself to blend with other guests. I tried sitting in one group and listened to their conversation, but when I tried to express my opinion... they all stared at me and smiled. Fell silent for a few seconds and then, changed the topic. That's my cue, clearly I don't belong in the crowd. I left the party leaving the Host feeling bad (or that's what she wanted me to feel). I didn't want to confront my 3 friends because I don't want to make it an issue. And besides, I wasn't harmed and got out of the party in one piece. This is not the first time it happened to me, though. And I always blamed myself for falling into the trap again. This is why I became an introvert, I'd rather be alone than being in a crowd where I don't feel I belong. If they say don't trust strangers, yeah... but I'd say, be very careful of those you called friends, they would sometimes make you feel "out of place". It's been a gloomy day at my place, hope yours is a sunny one. (c) Image from Pixabay.