Getting older changes your perceptions

@Fleura (30168)
United Kingdom
December 13, 2017 5:45am CST
I’ve really noticed this in the last couple of years – that the same things happen but now I worry about them in a different way to the way I did 25 years ago. For example, if I get out of breath shovelling snow: 25 years ago I would have thought ‘Gosh I must be unfit, must do more exercise’; now I start to worry I’m developing heart failure. If I struggle to lift a heavy sack: 25 years ago I would have thought ‘I wish I was stronger but I’m sure I’ll improve with practice’; now I start to worry that I’m losing strength with old age. If I can’t remember what I was supposed to be doing next: 25 years ago I would have thought ‘Oh dear I wish I had a better memory’; now I worry I might be developing dementia. If I spend the day hill-climbing and then find that my knees ache: 25 years ago I would have thought that was a natural consequence of the activity; now I start to worry I am getting arthritis. It’s a depressing mindset and I wish I could shake it off! Has anyone else noticed this change in attitude? All rights reserved. © Text and image copyright Fleur 2017.
16 people like this
19 responses
@Morleyhunt (21744)
• Canada
13 Dec 17
My aha moment happened about ten years ago. As I slipped and slid along an icy uncleared sidewalk...I thought...some little old lady is going to fall and hurt herself....then thought....if I fell here....someone would say...an old lady just fell. Not sure when it happened, but in that moment I realized I wasn't young any longer.
3 people like this
@Fleura (30168)
• United Kingdom
13 Dec 17
I know what you mean. I looked at a photo of myself gardening with Big One and I thought 'Who's that old woman with my daughter?'
2 people like this
@Morleyhunt (21744)
• Canada
13 Dec 17
1 person likes this
@TheHorse (217891)
• Walnut Creek, California
28 May 18
Heh. The same thing happened to me on a trail a couple of months ago. I did a face plant when my foot got caught under a root. I thought (and said to my hiking partner), "Sh*t! What if that happened to an older person!" Then I realized that to some, I might be seen as an old person.
1 person likes this
@kiran8 (15348)
• Mangalore, India
13 Dec 17
I too have noticed this change in my thinking and mindset . It makes you so helpless at times. I remember , how I jumped down from the sun roof just a few years ago and now I hesitate to do so from a stool or a chair . We just have to accept..
2 people like this
@kiran8 (15348)
• Mangalore, India
13 Dec 17
@Fleura It is understood that we try our best to keep ourselves fit ...
1 person likes this
@Fleura (30168)
• United Kingdom
13 Dec 17
I partly agree, but on the other hand I don't think we should expect deterioration too soon, that is self-fulfilling because if we don't do physical things we will lose strength faster!
1 person likes this
• Preston, England
14 Dec 17
I creak and ache in places I didn't know I had places nowadays - I used to bound downstairs three steps at a time but now slowly and just one at a time
2 people like this
@Fleura (30168)
• United Kingdom
14 Dec 17
Getting old is no fun, that's for sure.
1 person likes this
@marlina (154131)
• Canada
13 Dec 17
I find it depressing to get older.
2 people like this
@Fleura (30168)
• United Kingdom
13 Dec 17
It is, there's no two ways about it. As several old (in both senses of the word) friends have said, 'Old age has nothing to be said for it'.
1 person likes this
@JohnRoberts (109846)
• Los Angeles, California
13 Dec 17
Amen to that. Whoever said "golden years" was full of it.
2 people like this
@jaboUK (64354)
• United Kingdom
13 Dec 17
I'm not a worrier, but I've experienced all the scenarios you mention.. However, I do believe that there are good things about getting old - no bosses, your time is your own, can take off somewhere at the drop of a hat.
2 people like this
@Fleura (30168)
• United Kingdom
13 Dec 17
Very true, you have to make the most of the advantages at every stage!
1 person likes this
@JudyEv (338682)
• Rockingham, Australia
13 Dec 17
Yep, about twenty years ago I noticed this.
2 people like this
@Fleura (30168)
• United Kingdom
13 Dec 17
Well you're still going strong so there's hope yet!
1 person likes this
@bagarad (14283)
• Paso Robles, California
6 Jan 18
I certainly have noticed this. What I notice most is my increasing feeling of vulnerability and impending mortality. I'm almost afraid to climb a step stool and do other things that could increase my chance of falling, when ten years ago it wouldn't even enter my mind that I might fall.
1 person likes this
@bagarad (14283)
• Paso Robles, California
8 Jan 18
@Fleura It starts when you start feeling frail and uncertain of your abilities that you never used to doubt, or when your mate starts getting frail and you know you're next.
1 person likes this
@Fleura (30168)
• United Kingdom
8 Jan 18
@bagarad I wondered whether it started when you become a parent - you start imagining your children being left to grow up without you.
1 person likes this
@Fleura (30168)
• United Kingdom
8 Jan 18
I know what you mean - at a certain point you start to imagine all sorts of consequences, I'm not sure when that starts.
1 person likes this
@BelleStarr (61102)
• United States
13 Dec 17
I agree that we do change our perspective about our limitations as we grow older and rightfully so in many cases. Not that getting forgetful has to mean dementia or worse but I think it is better to be thoughtful about the challenges that face us than to ignore them and pretend we are still 20 years old.
2 people like this
@LadyDuck (470798)
• Switzerland
13 Dec 17
Yes, we lose strength and we must keep this in mind and be careful. I lifted a heavy bag last year, something I have always done in the garden, but this time I damaged my right shoulder.
1 person likes this
@LadyDuck (470798)
• Switzerland
14 Dec 17
@Fleura I had 18 physiotherapy session and I escaped surgery, but I must pay attention not to lift too heavy weights now.
1 person likes this
@Fleura (30168)
• United Kingdom
14 Dec 17
Oh dear, I hope you have recovered. I think we all need some regular exercise to keep our strength up!
1 person likes this
@nanette64 (20364)
• Fairfield, Texas
13 Dec 17
Even 11 years ago when I was 55, I was kicking butt @Fleura . I worked for a rancher 6 days a week,10 hours a day and believe me it was hard labor and sometimes dangerous. When I think about then and now how physically serious I am, it makes me think WTH??????
2 people like this
@DianneN (247186)
• United States
14 Dec 17
Oh, definitely! I try to keep fit, but age is taking its toll, mentally and physically. Sigh.....
1 person likes this
@Fleura (30168)
• United Kingdom
15 Dec 17
I've never been the athletic sort, but I'm inspired by people like this:
The athletes in their 60s, 70s, 80s and 90s competing for glory across the world.
1 person likes this
@DianneN (247186)
• United States
16 Dec 17
@Fleura These people are very inspirational. I do walk daily and ride my bike in Florida. I'll be joining the gym when my brother returns with his wife.
1 person likes this
@just4him (317004)
• Green Bay, Wisconsin
14 Dec 17
Yes, I have. I'm wishing now I had the same strength I had 25 years ago.
1 person likes this
@Fleura (30168)
• United Kingdom
14 Dec 17
Yes, I'm not sure I could do the things I did then - or am I just out of practice?
1 person likes this
@Fleura (30168)
• United Kingdom
15 Dec 17
@just4him I ride my bike often at the moment, but not every day. I wonder whether, if I did ride every single day, I would be able to keep it up - or would there come a day when suddenly I just couldn't do it any more?
1 person likes this
@just4him (317004)
• Green Bay, Wisconsin
14 Dec 17
@Fleura Maybe a little of both, out of practice and unable to because we're out of practice. I don't think I could ride a bike any longer, though they say some things are like riding a bike, maybe that also applies to getting old, some things are just left on the wayside and forgotten.
1 person likes this
@Hannihar (130218)
• Israel
3 Jan 18
Yes, every time something happens and I tell my doctor he mentions about getting older. It is not much fun but so far nothing can do about it.
1 person likes this
@Fleura (30168)
• United Kingdom
8 Jan 18
You have to be careful the doctor doesn't fob you off with that 'Oh it's just old age' thing - it's often just an excuse to do nothing!
1 person likes this
@Fleura (30168)
• United Kingdom
8 Jan 18
@Hannihar That's good, sometimes they just say 'Oh it's old age' when they could be doing something to treat conditions like chronic pain, for example.
@Hannihar (130218)
• Israel
8 Jan 18
@Fleura Fleur, my doctor is great so I believe what he says.
1 person likes this
30 May 18
I identify with you there. I have to brush off a lot of my self-demeaming thoughts. But my tendency to push myself to doing things to the finish to get good results often pays off. Feeling grateful that I still can do things-- but aching all over afterwards. Restful sleep is always sweet after a day's hard work. :-)
1 person likes this
@Fleura (30168)
• United Kingdom
30 May 18
At the moment I don't really feel any different to the way I did when I was younger, I just feel differently about the same things, if you see what I mean!
1 person likes this
@Fleura (30168)
• United Kingdom
30 May 18
@everwonderwhy I mean if I do something like climb a big hill and afterwards me legs ache, when I was younger I would have just thought that was the natural consequence of unusual activity but now I worry it is the first sign of some degenerative disease!
30 May 18
@Fleura You mean, you want to do new things different from when your were younger?
1 person likes this
@maezee (41988)
• United States
13 Dec 17
I havent reached that point yet although I have noticed activities that I would be fine with ten years ago leave me aching sometimes the next day.
1 person likes this
@Fleura (30168)
• United Kingdom
13 Dec 17
The funny thing is that I don't really feel any different, I just attribute the same feelings to different causes.
@TheHorse (217891)
• Walnut Creek, California
28 May 18
Heh. I might think, "Well, at least my chest doesn't hurt."
1 person likes this
@stapllotik (1933)
• India
13 Dec 17
How old are you ?
1 person likes this
@Fleura (30168)
• United Kingdom
13 Dec 17
I think I'm still 25 but I have to admit that I am definitely middle-aged now.
1 person likes this
• India
14 Dec 17
@Fleura goodone
1 person likes this
@ya2017 (86)
13 Dec 17
Sometimes it is better not to know at all about certain diseases. The more you know, the greater the chance of worrying.
1 person likes this
@Fleura (30168)
• United Kingdom
13 Dec 17
That's probably true. Unfortunately I work in medical sciences.
1 person likes this
@ya2017 (86)
13 Dec 17
@Fleura oh, :D,, getting older will make you become wiser, it can help
1 person likes this
• United States
13 Dec 17
Yes, I think of my age too much, and the consequences that could happen at any time. Mainly, I'm bewildered how I ever arrived here.
1 person likes this
@Fleura (30168)
• United Kingdom
14 Dec 17
Yes there is that as well - where did those years disappear to?