Have you ever had a girlfriend or boyfriend who "damaged" your thoughts about relationships?

Is he the father of your daughter?

@TheHorse well, obviously. Lol. I don't sleep around.

That's good. I'm still friends with a couple of exes.

I don't like being "controlled" either, though I do like knowing what I'm supposed to do if it's a job situation.

@TheHorse Oh ..here even others house helps might say you should not wear sleeveless or you should always wear pants or skirts. Pretty regressive environment. I have lived in hostels, so adjusting to this end is kind of what???? Here, it can be very hot in summers (113 F)..so wearing a single garment is fine with me, since we live on the top most floor. But my neighbor's mother in law came to me complaining that her daughter in law wears sleeveless so it is embarrassing for her (for mother in law), and so also dresses exposing her legs from mid calf down. She expected help from me to condemn my little kiddos mom. Instead I bought two sleeveless maxis (full length( and started wearing them, just to show which side of the fence I am on. I am that much of a rebel. Then she went on to announce to others that I don't get help from her (me) in looking after the kiddos. It is not my obligation! They are not my family! And I was devoting more than 2 to 3 hours each day to them. I actually gave up settling my room too much till the little ones develop some sense of what to do and what not to do since when they will come to my place is not certain and things get strewn up anyway. I can't be doing settling and cleaning the whole day! I definitely do not like being told don't give food to servants, you are giving too much, don't feed the kids, and so on and so forth. I fear I could lift some pot or pan and hit the person. lol A lot of such stuff ...so don't think I am a saint hero. lol. I am as evil as evil can get. LOL.

She was a beautiful black widow, so both me and my music friend photographed her (outside his house). I think he eventually vacuumed her, ending the relationship for good. When I think of my early ex-, I do think of black widow spiders.

It sounds like he was bitter and angry. I'm glad you're not with him.

@just4him I think a positive attitude promotes good health and prolongs life.

@TheHorse I believe that too.

I'm still in contact with both. The black widow-like gal is still self-absorbed and entirely unsupportive. The kind gal is still sweet and supportive. Do people really not change that much?

I have not had that kind of experience, as I'm a bit of a guy guy and would probably be able to cam the other down.

@TheHorse He was the perfect boyfriend for the first 7 years. It just went south from there.

Yes, I could see that. Especially after eight years.

@TheHorse It is crazy how some can make us feel like we are the ones at fault, yet their crazy . Its a very helpless feeling. Know that one brother

I'm still struggling with the effects of "the evil one."

I was being "ironic", or silly, or something. Mac Daddy is an American term for someone who "scores lots of babes." I was being funny, as nobody is a Mac Daddy in fifth grade.

One of my main criteria, back in the day, was intelligence. This girl had that attribute. But maybe I was too busy "being cool" to consider the importance of kindness and compassion.

@DianneN Our perspective on what's important really does change, doesn't it?

@TheHorse Kids! What we learn over the years.

Heh. I haven't had THAT many bad apples. And the older I get, the more I can acknowledge my own role in relationships that didn't work out (but not with that early gal--she was something else, and still is).

@db20747 Her doctor actually told her that her poor health is in part a result of her bad attitude.

@TheHorse that's great u see the forest through the trees!

It sometimes amazes me how "chance" can play such a big role in ones life.