Do As I Say and Not As I Do

@josie_ (10034)
Philippines
February 11, 2018 11:50pm CST
"All therefore whatsoever they bid you observe, that observe and do; but do ye not according to their works; for they say, and do not."~ Matthew 23:3 While waiting at a street corner for the walk signal to turn green, I overheard two other pedestrian conversing. "You should go out more often. Walking is good exercise" the middle age woman was saying to a petite lady who I estimated was in her late seventies (she had a companion and was using a cane). I chuckled inwardly because the woman who was giving the advice was obviously beyond overweight (P.C. term for "FAT!") All of us have at one time or another given advice to others of which we ourselves don't or can't follow. We see this practice often by our "leaders" and people in authority. They always seem to be the "exception" to the rule. But I suspect as parents, we are the #1 practitioners of this kind of "Not applicable to us" advice-giving. Parents have been telling their kids to "do as I say and not as I do" ever since parenting became a part of children's lives. I suppose we should be given some leeway because our only motive is wanting what's good for our children. But consider what effect it has on a young mind when they find out the hypocrisy and lack of conviction of the parental advice. Your opinion as a parent? Your opinion as a former child to your parent's parenting method?
4 people like this
4 responses
@LadyDuck (471498)
• Switzerland
12 Feb 18
My Dad was always an example. He accompanied us to Church every Sunday and he used to say "when you are adult, do what you want, until you are under my responsibility, you do what I ask to do and I do". He was a perfect father. My mom cheated a bit more.
2 people like this
@josie_ (10034)
• Philippines
12 Feb 18
Perhaps that's the reason why moms are more understanding of our faults and short comings? As the saying goes, "It takes one to know one"
1 person likes this
@LadyDuck (471498)
• Switzerland
12 Feb 18
@josie_ Mom has never been the more understanding between my parents. I always went to talk to my father, may be he was more strict, but he listened what I had to say, not mom. My mother and I were too much the opposite, this is why I was closer to my Dad, we were very similar.
2 people like this
@josie_ (10034)
• Philippines
12 Feb 18
@LadyDuck _We tend to stereotype the roles of parents in that fathers are the strict disciplinarian while mothers are the ones we go to for comfort and understanding. Then there is the "daddy's girl" and "mama's boy" dependency that some parents unconsciously encourage. These form of family bonding is not necessarily "bad" unless taken to the extreme.
1 person likes this
@Maria24 (2661)
• United States
12 Feb 18
My dad goes to church every Sunday but he's always angry saying bad words and getting drunk.
1 person likes this
@josie_ (10034)
• Philippines
12 Feb 18
Apparently your parish priest or preacher need to improve his sermons.
@allen0187 (58582)
• Philippines
13 Feb 18
Heard and seen this far too many times.
@YrNemo (20255)
13 Feb 18
My parents lived in their own world, too far above from us. Double standard there . Whatever rules I set out for my children, I stick to those rules too. Sad, but one must set a good example for those kids. (eg, if the kids were supposed to go to sleep at 7PM, I snored already at 6:50PM .)