Parents and tradition getting in the way of love and peace of mind

@mydanods (6513)
Nigeria
March 2, 2018 1:27am CST
To cut a long story short. In our area, and according to tradition, before a man marries a woman he needs the blessings of his parents. If the parents disagree, every other family member would not support the marriage. Some would not even come to the wedding. That brings a conflict of interest. What if you want to marry a girl and your brother doesn’t like the girl because they went to the same school and have had issues in the past? He starts talking to your parents about disagreeing with your choice. You know this very well and have told your parents about it. Now, they would not want to hear anything about this girl. You love her. You want her. You have seen the best you can get from a woman in her. But your parents who don’t know anything about her disagree with your choice. I love my parents and love our traditions but love and peace of mind is what a man is looking for. In a situation like this, would you ditch your parents and tradition and go ahead with the marriage arrangements?
3 people like this
4 responses
@shaggin (72141)
• United States
2 Mar 18
Yep I would go against what my parents and siblings thought and marry her. That tradition sounds awful and outdated!
2 people like this
@mydanods (6513)
• Nigeria
2 Mar 18
Haha. That is some encouragement indeed.
2 people like this
@jcvee2009 (151)
• Philippines
2 Mar 18
For us children, it is important to seek for the blessings of our parents first before getting married as giving respect to them. But sometimes, there are parents who are narrow minded and wouldn't listen to any explanations. In my opinion, as long as you trully love the girl and knew her so well and you think you both will be happy with each other and mostly you are matured enough to enter married life and face all the consequences of your actions, then go on, marry her. You will be the one to live with the girl anyway not them...
2 people like this
@mydanods (6513)
• Nigeria
2 Mar 18
You are right but the blessings of parents are very important.
1 person likes this
@vandana7 (100302)
• India
2 Mar 18
Yes. I would. That said, parents are our responsibility to an extent. So it is up to them, whether they want to stay with us and let us serve them, or let us pay for their upkeep to the extent we can. If relatives don't come, I don't give a damn. I don't give a damn if nobody attends the marriage. Main thing is, there has to be understanding of each other ..like what annoys the person, when the person gets angry, etc. Likes can be discovered later, dislikes should be known first, and what is expected of us in respect of those.
2 people like this
@mydanods (6513)
• Nigeria
2 Mar 18
Point taken.
1 person likes this
• Yogyakarta, Indonesia
5 Mar 18
go ahead.. you must believe with the love that you have.. strugle our love.. stay to marry her and aprove to your mother, even to your brother that your Choice is absolutely right.. not wrong at all..
1 person likes this
@mydanods (6513)
• Nigeria
5 Mar 18
Thanks. I will surely be thinking about doing so even though I will incur the wrath of the family.