Grocery Shopping Can Be So Cofusing

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Grocery shopping is not a thing I enjoy doing. It's time consuming and can also be so damn confusing. The other day while shopping, I stumbled upon a few things, that didn't make sense at all, and I had to wonder if the consumers knew that they were being played as fools? For starter's, what's up with "evaporated milk?" I didn't fall off the turnip truck yesterday, you know, and I know that "evaporate," means to disappear! So they are selling cans of air and calling it milk that has evaporated? What would anyone need a can of milk that has evaporated for? Here kid's, eat your cereal with delicious air! And while we're on the subject, sitting next to the "milk that evaporated," was a can of "condensed milk." Wouldn't that just be a glob of moldy cheese, in a can? And seriously, what is the deal with "cage free eggs?" Do the eggs know they're not in cages? Do they really care? I mean, did they have an egg protest, where they all held signs that said; "No More Cages," and "Free The Eggs Now!" I get it, the poor little eggies don't want to be in cages, so where do they want to be, on a vacation in the Bahama's? Oh, and get this . . . now they are bullying the chickens and calling them names! I'm not kidding, they advertised this chicken as a "jerk." They don't have to call this chicken names, I mean, after all, this "jerk of a chicken," gave up his life for you to consume him. So what if he was a "jerk," he's dead now! How about you, do you like grocery shopping? Are you just as confused as I am?