Losing a dear friend

Tweet

I know I am going to have a hard time typing this, so bare with me. Tuesday afternoon, I got a call from a very good friend of mine who is married to another good friend of mine that her dearly beloved was in hospice care. I was on break at work and I broke down. I knew he was sick, but not that sick. I told her I wanted to see him after work. I had every intention of going right after. I never got the chance. I texted her to ask her if it would be OK to come at a certain time and I got the horrible news he had already passed away. I never got to say goodbye how I wanted to. My heart is so broken over this. I have lost others to cancer, but this friend and my grandmother who passed has hit me the hardest. Words can not truly express how sad this truly makes me. Some people deal with grief differently. I wanted to visit his wife, but I know she is probably with a ton of family and close friends, so I did not want to impose, but now I feel like a bad friend for not being there for her right after. They got married on July 6th and sadly I could not be there, but her pictures of their happily ever after are so heartwarming and endearing. I truly think his dying wish was to marry her and make them both happy. This was both their 2nd marriage, but I know they were meant for each other. His funeral will be on Sat and I am planning on bringing a change of clothes so I can go right after work to pay my respects to this wonderfully kindhearted soul that I had the pleasure of knowing. It will not be easy at all and I know I will cry so much, but I want to be there. I need to be there to say my final farewell. I will always love him and he will never ever be forgotten. Cancer is horrible and I hope 1 day it will never take anyone else.