Planning me and my Girlfriend Budget

By mor
Kiryat Ata, Israel
September 12, 2018 11:07am CST
Me and my girlfriend want to get married in the future. We have love, respect, fun and I'm sure it will keep being that way. Money...I'm not so sure. So far so good, I work and I earn well. She looks for a job. My sister warns me about the money. We will have to pay rent, pay for food, many things involving taking care of babies we want to have. Fixing the car, studing, going out, that's a lot of expances. My sister married her spouse knowing he had no permanent job, they agreed about who pays for what. Now they have bigger problems since the spouse has a back injury, he works part time job. The baby has a weight problem almost 12 kg and only 1 year old. He can't crawl, nor stand up, he needs special treatment that costs money too. What about saving for the future when for some reason one or both get fired or cannot work ? Any tips from you all, mylotters, any experience you want to share?
11 people like this
10 responses
@LadyDuck (472074)
• Switzerland
12 Sep 18
Once you are married you help your wife and your wife is supposed to help you. It's not always an easy life, but if you are happy being together nothing is too hard.
2 people like this
• Kiryat Ata, Israel
20 Sep 18
We are happy so far, we will keep it that way, we will always feed the flame and make sure it lights up more and more. The flame needs fuel. :-) Then, the light will help us see the way.
2 people like this
• Kiryat Ata, Israel
20 Sep 18
@LadyDuck My big brother's spouse was a nice lady before they got kids, now she is very pedantic and stressful woman. I saw my girlfriend sisters, they are older then her, and they are all nice and simple, it means that she will be nice like them too in the future even with the kids that we plan to have.
2 people like this
@LadyDuck (472074)
• Switzerland
20 Sep 18
@stringer321 This is true, a lot of patience is needed from both side.
1 person likes this
@anya12adwi (9847)
• India
12 Sep 18
It is a team work.. So teamup, plan and then get into the field.. Good luck..
1 person likes this
• Kiryat Ata, Israel
12 Sep 18
@anya12adwi Thanks a lot for your comment. One for all and all for one, that's the golden rule (sort of). We are a good team. She reminds me things I tend to forget, I help her with things she doesn't know, for example, with the PC. I'm sure we will find ways to help ourselves if we keep being positive and for each other. Jobs will be more and more rare in the future since many things become automate with the technology. Many people will have hard time finding a job.
• India
14 Sep 18
@stringer321 That's true.. Jobs would be eaten by technology.. sometimes, i get sleepless nights only thinking about this thing..
• Kiryat Ata, Israel
14 Sep 18
@anya12adwi We will have no choice but to learn to love each other, to understand each other, not to keep only for ourselves, but to share.
1 person likes this
@flapiz (23152)
• United Kingdom
22 Sep 18
I used to live with my partner and he didn’t have a stable job. Actually we both didn’t back then. We were both working part time and his hourly rate is only st minimum. Life wasn’t easy, but we love each other. And we adjust depending on how much we have. Financially it was one of the most challenging part in my life but looking back at it now, it’s the happiest. We made it through because we try to cook at home and eat out less. Can save a lot of money by doing this.
1 person likes this
• Kiryat Ata, Israel
22 Sep 18
Hard times can sometimes bring the best of us. We find creative solutions, we work together to solve, it brings us toghether. That's a good side of not being rich. We both have a goal :-)
1 person likes this
@flapiz (23152)
• United Kingdom
22 Sep 18
@stringer321 That’s true. It also tests the relationship. As long as both of you tries to contribute it will work out.
1 person likes this
• Preston, England
23 Sep 18
apply for all the support you can, and look for cheapest options on everything you buy - good luck
1 person likes this
• Kiryat Ata, Israel
29 Sep 18
I'm not sure if we need support. We work and spend for what we need. If we buy every cheapest option, it will make us look poor. I think it is more appropriate to buy the usual things, and then save some money. Work harder a little bit for the next few months.
1 person likes this
• Preston, England
30 Sep 18
@stringer321 where you can budget for it then yes, the poorest options needn't be the only options for you
1 person likes this
@JudyEv (342115)
• Rockingham, Australia
29 Sep 18
Being married requires a great deal of commitment but it is really wonderful to be able to share your life with someone you love.
1 person likes this
• Kiryat Ata, Israel
29 Sep 18
I bought her an engagement ring yesterday. More than 0.6 karat of diamonds on that ring, more than 5600 NIS. It is more than my salary for this month. The party will cost like 5 times that ring... So far so good, we love each other and I will spend more on our love to maintain it. We both work now. She got accepted to work in a cloth store. I am commited :-) Mylot will be in a lower priority for now.
• Kiryat Ata, Israel
29 Sep 18
@JudyEv thank you very much. We will work for our success.
1 person likes this
@JudyEv (342115)
• Rockingham, Australia
29 Sep 18
@stringer321 I wish you both the very best of luck.
1 person likes this
@shubhu3 (36463)
• New Delhi, India
12 Sep 18
Wow. It feels really good to see people who love each other marrying. I would say work together on the budget, write it somewhere, and most importantly always have faith on each other .
1 person likes this
• Kiryat Ata, Israel
12 Sep 18
We will plan the budget together, thanks for the advice. If my parents did that, they would agree and would not fight over money usage. I will not repeat their mistake. I hope the planning will go well, I can compromise on a lot of things as long as there is love :-)
1 person likes this
@shubhu3 (36463)
• New Delhi, India
13 Sep 18
@stringer321 That's the spirit . All the best.
@rsa101 (38166)
• Philippines
1 Oct 18
Although we never planned financially when we got married. But it could have been better that we have planned it. But at that time we thought everything went on smooth sailing. But as time goes on, money took a toll on the both of us. Although we're more mature in tackling money problems we try not to put emotions get entangled with it. When there is an incoming money problem we talk and discuss how much to share on it to be able to afford it. If it cannot then we have to find means. There is no pointing fingers or blaming in the talk. In the end I guess that works for us for some time. Money problem will certainly come along to mess with marriage if both adds emotions and bitterness in it then it won't work no matter how much money you save in the bank it will be depleted. If you talk calmly and objectively about it sometimes even the lack of money can be solved smoothly and life goes on.
1 person likes this
• Kiryat Ata, Israel
1 Oct 18
@rsa101 you are right. Thanks for sharing. What I really want is to have a good relationship with my affianced. If she wants to spend some more, and we can afford it, then let it be. Money is not everything. Some couples that are poor can have better life than a rich couple.
1 person likes this
@1hopefulman (45120)
• Canada
21 Sep 18
Are you living together or living in different places at this time?
@1hopefulman (45120)
• Canada
21 Sep 18
@stringer321 Actually, I'm glad you are waiting until you marry to live together. God is pleased with that and that Is a good start to happy life together. So, save as much money as you can. Learn to budget and handle money is a resourceful and responsible way.
1 person likes this
• Kiryat Ata, Israel
30 Sep 18
@1hopefulman You may be right, so far, I know some who lived together before getting married, and some who didn't live together before marriage. More of the later couples had good life, and stayed together. My parents are an exception, and my mom's brother is an exception. They got divorced.
1 person likes this
• Kiryat Ata, Israel
21 Sep 18
@1hopefulman We live in defferent places at this time. Everyone in his house. I know it is recomended to live together before getting married to get to know each other. In their culture, they don't do it because they keep their daughter virgin. I think it is all right. I saw her older sisters with their children, they are all nice, they don't get angry and shout spontaneously. Let's hope she will stay that way. Bring me hope, Hope :-)
1 person likes this
@cherigucchi (14876)
• Philippines
13 Sep 18
Its good that you are already preparing already for your future. Its not going to be that easy but it is just right that you are helping each other.
• Kiryat Ata, Israel
13 Sep 18
@cherigucchi Thank you very much. I know it's not going to be easy, we have families I hope they will be happy to come and visit us, and help a little bit. It will be welcomed. So, we will calculate the amount of money needed for the wedding, the monthly expenses for the time until the baby gets born, and etc... We will make sure we have the budget for that.
@Janet357 (75646)
22 Sep 18
My husband and i got married with no big savings. But we just kept our life wedding and lifestyle simple. We both work but we dont spend much on things we dont need. It’s important thAt your wife to be should also work. Maybe, on the first year of marriage, money will not be a problem, but as time goes by, it will be.
• Kiryat Ata, Israel
22 Sep 18
She got accepted to a job in a clothings store, YAY !!! :-) She will help customers to choose clothes that may be the best for them. Thank you for the tip, now we can plan the budget assuming she has a job.