Should I or should I not ?
By RosieS
@proseprity68 (331)
United States
December 10, 2018 9:01pm CST
Asking for opinions right now.
I am now married to a man who has 4 grown up kids. He divorced his wife because she had gambling problems.
The man I am married to has 1 favorite daughter and of course the 3 other kids don't mind that.
I have a teenage daughter from a previous relationship.
The man I am married to right now has never treated my daughter like his own and that hurts me.
What I noticed is, whenever this man & I have an argument, he doesn't recommend to his co workers, the homemade egg rolls I make. Is that childish or what ?
We have been married for 6 years and I feel I am having the 7 year itch because of the emotional roller coaster I had and have with him. I actually came to a point of questioning my sanity. I even had to go and see a talk therapist already.
I read an article and I have a strong feeling he really is indeed a gas lighter.
If you guys don't feel comfortable answering this topic, just simply say, I'm sorry I can't help you.
5 people like this
4 responses
@hillhjill (23717)
• United States
11 Dec 18
I'm sorry that you are going through this, I have been married for 11 years now, but I know what you mean when it comes to the kids as I was treated the same way by my mom's husband soon to be ex, he always treated me like dirt and my mom never really stood up to him about it maybe she couldn't. Have you guys sat down and talked about this.
2 people like this
@proseprity68 (331)
• United States
11 Dec 18
With all these things happening, I am now strongly thinking and telling myself that I did make a mistake.
With this man I am married to right now, I just feel hurt that he is emotionally distant from my daughter.
Unlike other husbands whose wife has a child or children form a previous marriage, they make the child or children feel that he is his own child or children.
We went to a marriage counselor and that's where I really sobbed and I just didn't care. After 3 or 5 visits with the marriage counselor, I felt that the marriage counselor also gave up on our situation, specially because of him.
I had to see a talk therapist because I started to doubt my sanity.
1 person likes this
@hillhjill (23717)
• United States
11 Dec 18
@proseprity68 I'm sorry to hear this, I hope everything works out for you.
1 person likes this
@proseprity68 (331)
• United States
12 Dec 18
I agree.
She is my priority and always have been, more now that she is a teenager.
I know she needs me more than anything else.
1 person likes this
@Nevena83 (65277)
• Serbia
12 Dec 18
@proseprity68 You're right. I have a son of 16 years and I know how much we need them now.
1 person likes this
@Tampa_girl7 (50250)
• United States
12 Dec 18
Have you spoken to him about how you feel ?
1 person likes this
@proseprity68 (331)
• United States
13 Dec 18
It's almost a viscous cycle, so to speak.
In the past, he told me that if something is bothering him, let him know and that's what I did in the past and that was a mistake.
A mistake on my part because I thought he meant what he said that I should tell him and when I did, he raised his voice and when I told him why does he have to raise his voice and he would say, I am just explaining.
With that, I have learned to just be quiet and that also bothers him.
This has made me reach out to friends and told me to see a marriage counselor and I told him about this, yes, he did agree but then again, even the marriage counselor gave up on us, specially because of him because of how he was responding to things while we were in therapy.
Right now, I am just establishing myself, financially and when I am fully established, it will be easy for me and my daughter to just go.
