It is kind of funny
@GardenGerty (160663)
United States
January 31, 2019 9:53am CST
Years ago, almost twenty, in fact, my little great niece lived with me. Her mother drove a truck. This came about because the person who was taking care of Katy turned out to be an abusive person, who could not handle it.
Her mom, my niece, did not want her mom to raise her daughter. When my niece tried working and having a "normal" life, Katy would have tantrums at school and get in trouble and they would page her mom.Her mom could not keep a job.
These behaviors continued here, but our schools tried to manage it. I still used up all my sick and personal time to help her. Her mom still spoiled her over breaks and vacations or whenever. The child had more Barbie Dolls than any store. Eventually I told her mom to get a job and get her child. Katy would tell it that I was so mean. I guess I was.
Katy has a baby of her own now. Living situation is not 100% the best but they are safe and cared for, after starting out with an abusive relationship. She and the baby share a room in the apartment her mom and mom's girlfriend have. It is crowded, but it works.
I get pictures, videos, and messages on Facebook almost every day from Katy.She tells me about teeth, and sleep patterns, etc. Even some horrible temper tantrums the baby has. I am so mean, but I am the one who will chat back and tell her all the things she is doing right. Guess my meanness made an impact.
14 people like this
13 responses
@LovingMyBabies (85288)
• Valdosta, Georgia
31 Jan 19
Sometimes tough love is the best way to handle a situation. Seems like this was one of those times. :)
4 people like this
@GardenGerty (160663)
• United States
31 Jan 19
Yes, Bob and I were the consistency she needed in her life. She was so funny. If she knew Bob was not working, she would get in trouble at school so he would have to come sit with her. He got to where he put on his work clothes every morning whether he was on shift or not.
2 people like this
@GardenGerty (160663)
• United States
31 Jan 19
Especially if meanness really is 1. making her take her medicine, 2. making her do her homework 3. making her go to bed on time 4.not buying her more junk. I am strict and I like routine.
1 person likes this
@GardenGerty (160663)
• United States
2 Feb 19
@amadeo She is learning every day from having her own little one.
@amadeo (111938)
• United States
31 Jan 19
@GardenGerty you need to pass this on to her
1 person likes this
@celticeagle (166911)
• Boise, Idaho
31 Jan 19
I went through a similar situation with my grand daughter. She now is self sufficient and thanks me over and over for being strict and doing all I did. Some not so pretty.
1 person likes this
@GardenGerty (160663)
• United States
2 Feb 19
@celticeagle Katy is doing okay, I think she does well as a mother. I hope she keeps out of stupid relationships.
1 person likes this
@GardenGerty (160663)
• United States
31 Jan 19
I remember that you have lived through a lot of the same difficulties. You understand.
1 person likes this
@celticeagle (166911)
• Boise, Idaho
31 Jan 19
@GardenGerty ......Yes, indeed I do.
1 person likes this
@lovinangelsinstead21 (36850)
• Pamplona, Spain
31 Jan 19
Godo news that she is making progress now albeit with the baby having tantrums.
She will do fine with you helping her.
1 person likes this
@GardenGerty (160663)
• United States
2 Feb 19
The baby is learning to sleep in her crib. They had not had one set up and Katy would hold her most all night or sleep with her on her bed. It has taken about a week and now she self soothes and goes to sleep with minimal fussing.
1 person likes this
@lovinangelsinstead21 (36850)
• Pamplona, Spain
2 Feb 19
@GardenGerty
Now that is lucky fro the baby to going to sleep by herself mine used to cry day and night for months.
@GardenGerty (160663)
• United States
2 Feb 19
She is happy, and is trying to think through her choices as they come along. The baby is really cute.
1 person likes this
@LadyDuck (471500)
• Switzerland
2 Feb 19
@GardenGerty I am glad she is happy, she can now take care of her baby and have a happy life.
@Courtlynn (67085)
• United States
31 Jan 19
If you were called mean, then you did your job. 
1 person likes this
@GardenGerty (160663)
• United States
2 Feb 19
My own kids did not really think of me as mean, but many of my kids I baby sat did, because I was stricter than their parents.
1 person likes this
@Courtlynn (67085)
• United States
2 Feb 19
@GardenGerty between the 60 kids my mom and I have watched, we've only been called mean by one kid, and that was my niece - only because her mom was in NY for five days and she was going from her moms bf, her grandmother and us throughout that time so she was overwhelmed.
@wolfgirl569 (106226)
• Marion, Ohio
31 Jan 19
They all hate discipline at a certain point. Later they know it was for the best.
1 person likes this
@GardenGerty (160663)
• United States
2 Feb 19
I am sure there were things my own kids disliked, but they were very easy kids to raise. Katy did a number on my stress level.
@GardenGerty (160663)
• United States
31 Jan 19
She told me some time back that I was always one of her biggest supporters.
1 person likes this
@GardenGerty (160663)
• United States
2 Feb 19
I have been called mean before, but I also have had some really good relationships with some troubled kiddos.
1 person likes this
@DianneN (247186)
• United States
2 Feb 19
@GardenGerty So have I with my former students. They even returned to visit and thank me. It was very rewarding.
@GardenGerty (160663)
• United States
2 Feb 19
She is feeling very supported by all of her family. The father of the baby was both mentally and physically abusive, of Katy and the dog. We got rid of him, and her mom got her safe. It seems to take all of us to help her along.
1 person likes this
@just4him (317041)
• Green Bay, Wisconsin
2 Feb 19
@GardenGerty I'm not surprised it does with her being abused.
@GardenGerty (160663)
• United States
2 Feb 19
Her actions say a lot and I get lots of cute pics on my Facebook of the baby.
1 person likes this
@GardenGerty (160663)
• United States
31 Jan 19
She is one of those people who always has to do things the hard way.
1 person likes this
@GardenGerty (160663)
• United States
31 Jan 19
Someone in her life needed to be consistent. She has had to take the consequences of some wrong choices, but overall, she is doing pretty well.
