Why don't parents get it???
By Bloom
@Sedakabloom (94)
July 2, 2019 9:33am CST
Hi . I'm new to mylot.. and today I'm gonna rant about something which is bothering me a lot.. and that is.. marriage ..
Growing up in an Indian family is not easy.. it becomes even hard if you're a girl. I can't speak for every girl out there but yes.. most of us live a miserable life. I haven't even completed my studies yet and my family is telling me to get married. And that made me so angry at my parents at this damn society.. like let me breathe..!! I made so many plans for my life, what I wanna do in future.. what I'm planning to achieve.. but no.. nobody gives a damn about it. We're like a burden to them.. they're just planning to get rid of it.
I just don't understand why Indian parents don't see their kids as another individual, who has a life.. who has done a lot of crazy things in their life.. who has a lot of memories with everyone.. who has dreams and hopes.. waiting to be fulfilled.. they just don't care at all.
Talking to them is not an option because they'll yell at you or emotionally blackmail you.. and they'll make you feel guilty about it. It's all so sick. So so sick.
I hate living a double life.. i hate all this.. I just wanna breathe.. and say all the things out loud..
But I guess.. I'm born in a wrong country..!
13 people like this
13 responses
@LovingMyBabies (85288)
• Valdosta, Georgia
2 Jul 19
I am so sorry for what you are dealing with. I'm not Indian, however my parents believed when I was a child that I was meant to be seen and never heard so that part I completely understand and it was hard!! =( Whenever we tried to tell them how we felt we would also be yelled at and punished...I HATED my childhood!
I will be praying that you can get yourself out of the situation so you can be happy and live the life you dream of! Hang in there, this is just for a season and it will pass.
2 people like this
@LovingMyBabies (85288)
• Valdosta, Georgia
3 Jul 19
@Sedakabloom Just know that God sees what you're going through and He will make a way for you to do your hearts desires. You are loved and ACCEPTED by Him.
1 person likes this
@Sedakabloom (94)
•
3 Jul 19
That actually is the story of many girls here. Indian parents are also like that. They always support male child more than a female child. I guess it will take a few more years here for people to fully understand that we're destined to do great things too.
1 person likes this
@Sedakabloom (94)
•
3 Jul 19
@LovingMyBabies thank u so much.. this comment made me feel a lot better..
1 person likes this
@Sedakabloom (94)
•
2 Jul 19
Thank you. I just hope to get out of this puddle soon..!
1 person likes this
@porwest (92624)
• United States
3 Jul 19
@Sedakabloom I wish my liberal friends were here, paying attention to the difference between the world we live in and the world they want us to live in. I wish the best for you despite your circumstances.
@Sedakabloom (94)
•
3 Jul 19
Wish I could do that. There are no jobs here that I can do part time. It's actually very sad that everyone here is dependent on their parents. We can't even move out of the house.. it's just very different here..
1 person likes this
@ihasaquestion (8275)
•
2 Jul 19
It's a culture thing, unfortunately. Try to get another elderly who is understanding and reason them out. If you do not want to get married yet, then don't. You own you. Be polite to your parents though.
1 person likes this
@ihasaquestion (8275)
•
2 Jul 19
@Sedakabloom If you're being forced to marry against your will, by all means do so.
@Sedakabloom (94)
•
2 Jul 19
I don't think anyone will understand this. I've decided to just fight.. and just be adamant
@a_jerobon (2304)
• Eldoret, Kenya
3 Jul 19
So sorry for what you are going through there. I didn't know that this still happens. If possible, you should look for a new place/country to live in. Someone should talk sense to this parents, if only they could listen.
1 person likes this
@DianeBorg (785)
• Malta
2 Jul 19
I think it is their culture, but you have your own rights if you want to keep on studying, it is your right, if you don't want to get married it's your right too, you will marry when you are ready.
1 person likes this
@Sedakabloom (94)
•
2 Jul 19
Exactly my point.. for that I will have to fight. There's no point in talking to them.. I will just have to do everything for myself.
1 person likes this
@popciclecold (39518)
• United States
2 Jul 19
I can only imagine, that have to be tough.
1 person likes this
@velvet53 (22533)
• Palisade, Colorado
4 Jul 19
This is a sad way for you to have to live. I don't know how old you are but is there a way you could move out? You seem to have your life and goals in order and that is good. You deserve to have control of your life and future. sure hope that you can find a way to get on with your life, your way.
@Sedakabloom (94)
•
4 Jul 19
Wish I could move out.. but sadly I can't. Indian kids are dependent on their parents for a long time because there are no jobs here.. we have to study our a** off to get a decent paying job.. and parents have to pay the college fees.. I know it might sound crazy for u.. but it's kinda normal here.. but I actually hate this thing.. it makes the parents feel like they own us..!
1 person likes this
@velvet53 (22533)
• Palisade, Colorado
4 Jul 19
@Sedakabloom I understand all that you are saying. Being here on myLot will help you some. I know that it won't be much but every penny put away helps. Maybe some day you will be able to move somewhere else and get a good job. I am always here for you if you need to talk.
1 person likes this
@Sedakabloom (94)
•
4 Jul 19
@velvet53 thank u so much.. that means a lot to me ...
1 person likes this
@TiarasOceanView (70022)
• United States
2 Jul 19
I am so very sorry to read this..you are suffering and you have a right to rant.
Rant away.
Keep your independent mind even though others try to inflict this on you.
I admire you for being so adamant.
Please take care and we are here anytime.
1 person likes this
@Sedakabloom (94)
•
2 Jul 19
Yeah.. their intentions are right but their decisions are wrong
1 person likes this
@Aansh13 (11397)
• New Delhi, India
2 Jul 19
Being an Indian I know your struggle, but it's not only in India my dear friend.
Secondly, it's about the culture we come from...I got married at the age of 30, most of my friends got married at the same age, my cousin's are still unmarried and of the same age... So no pressure as such...
1 person likes this
@Sedakabloom (94)
•
2 Jul 19
You're so lucky that your parents are understanding.
1 person likes this
@debjani1 (7202)
•
3 Jul 19
All parents are not like that. Don't underestimate your own country. Everything looks beautiful from far away places. But when you visit there , you can realise every country have some problems. Don't get angry with your parents. Talk to them clearly. Makes your points clear to them. Understand their feelings too. Then decide. Afterall life is yours.
@Nakitakona (56486)
• Philippines
4 Jul 19
Don't say that you were born in a wrong country. Whether you born in other country, you have to adapt to their culture. There's a saying that when we are rome, live like the Romans do.
