A Question of Timing

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Over the past ten years I have had a lot of different interactions with the opposite sex; most of them just on a casual level but some went a little (cough) further. If you don't know, I am a bilateral amputee (I don't have legs below the knee). This creates a little bit of a problem when 'dating". Why? Several things. When exactly do you tell someone that you are a BKA? When you first meet them? After you have a date or two? When you know they aren't in it just for your stumps? In addition to all that you have to worry about how people are going to react when you tell them. One person got completely ticked saying I was being sneaky or deceptive by not saying anything about it when we first met. Thats when I decided that any dates would happen in a casual setting and I'd wear cargo shorts. Sadly, most of the time I end up with stump humpers (guys with a fetish for amputees) who look at you like you are a steak that just came off the grill. While there's nothing wrong with asking me questions bout them (the stumps) if one of them is "Can I rub your residual limb?" you aren't getting a call back. Saying "residual limb" means you know the verbage and chances are that's the only reason for the date. It isn't me you are into, it's my stumps. So if you were in my shoes (no pun intended) how would you handle that type of situation?