I Want to Curl Up into a Ball and Die
By DianneN
@DianneN (247186)
United States
November 6, 2019 3:05pm CST
My son and I spent three hours at the veterinarian clinic today.
Doodles, our beautiful, smart, and loving cat hasn’t been acting right for the last two months. He hasn’t been eating his food or treats, doesn’t want to go outside as much, favors his left paw, limps, loses his balance, and sleeps most of the day away.
Last month we had his cardiologist do another ultrasound on his heart and a complete blood work up. He received wonderful reports.
Today his vet gave Doodles a thorough examination including x-rays and an abdominal ultrasound. Our precious baby has fluid outside his abdomen called Ascites. His prognosis is dire. He has cancer, which the lab reports will let us know its exact whereabouts. Due to his heart condition, he can not be treated.
The vet doesn’t advocate euthanasia, but suggests it for Doodles before he gets more uncomfortable which will be very, very soon.
My husband just built a wooden coffin. My son will set up an appointment to have Doodles euthanized as soon as possible.
Forgive me if I can’t be a good myLotter now. I can’t see through my tears.
67 people like this
69 responses
@DianneN (247186)
• United States
7 Nov 19
. I’m in tears again. Our son was here crying, and Doodles knew it. We can’t cry in front of him.
Thank you so much for your kind words. Today he showed his first signs of pain by hiding under a desk in a spare bedroom and later under a chair in the family room. The mobile vet will do the deed on Tuesday at 3:00PM. She spoke to our vet and had to squeeze us in. Doodles can’t wait much longer.
5 people like this
@cplante62 (37)
• United States
8 Nov 19
@DianneN I am so sorry. I am still praying for you and your family, especially for Doodles to ease his pain.
3 people like this
@wolfgirl569 (105284)
• Marion, Ohio
6 Nov 19
Soooo Sorry I just knew what was happening when I read your title. It is never easy to do. But seeing him suffer would be worse. Hug him for the little time left.
7 people like this
@wolfgirl569 (105284)
• Marion, Ohio
6 Nov 19
@DianneN For you and the family For Doodles
2 people like this
@DianneN (247186)
• United States
6 Nov 19
@wolfgirl569 Thanks sooooo much. We all need those hugs.
2 people like this
@JohnRoberts (109846)
• Los Angeles, California
6 Nov 19
Oh no. We all love Doodles here. It just won't be the same without that scamp's adventures.
8 people like this
@LindaOHio (176697)
• United States
6 Nov 19
My heart breaks for you, Dianne. I am so, so sorry...but you don't want him to suffer needlessly. You have the support of all of us. Let me know if you want to talk about it.
7 people like this
@LindaOHio (176697)
• United States
7 Nov 19
@DianneN I totally understand. We've been through it 4 times; and it never gets easier.
1 person likes this
@snowy22315 (179751)
• United States
6 Nov 19
no words..it is going to hurt for a long time. I went through that just nine months ago.
4 people like this
@marguicha (222381)
• Chile
7 Nov 19
Dearest, I understand perfectly well. If the vet says it should be done sooner than hater, trust the vet. I could not let go of Misty, my beautiful dog, and she spent her last week in pain. Sometimes letting go is the best act of love you can do.
4 people like this
@marguicha (222381)
• Chile
7 Nov 19
@DianneN It took me well over a year to talk about her without tears. But I knew that she was in dog´s heaven
2 people like this
@1creekgirl (41330)
• United States
6 Nov 19
That is such sad news! I know Doodles is part of your family..you'll be in my prayers.
4 people like this
@sallypup (60796)
• Centralia, Washington
7 Nov 19
@DianneN Poor fur baby. I heard a song on the radio the afternoon I was driving from my Mom's final party. The song comforted me even as I wailed along with it. One of the lines went something like:
"Some where up ahead someone waits for you." That line about drove me off the road. Know this: Doodles is love and Doodle's spirit is there with you no matter what.
1 person likes this
@DianneN (247186)
• United States
7 Nov 19
Thank you so much, Lenore. . That was beautifully stated.
Today he showed his first signs of pain by hiding under a desk in a spare bedroom and later under a chair in the family room. The mobile vet will do the deed on Tuesday at 3:00. She spoke to our vet and had to squeeze us in. Doodles can’t wait much longer.
We are heartbroken over this.
2 people like this
@NJChicaa (119379)
• United States
6 Nov 19
I am so sooooo sorry! I know your heart is breaking. You love him so much. But you will be doing the right and kindest thing to let him be free of suffering and pain. I had to go through the same thing when my beloved SoCo had cancer at 15. Trust me the process is much harder on the humans than it is on the cat. They literally just go to sleep.
I am here for you! I've been there and I understand how much it hurts.
4 people like this
@birjudanak (14320)
• India
7 Nov 19
It such sad news and I always seen here that you always love your cat and treat like your family member and its a great thing. I know its a difficult time for you and your family but we all are with you always and you are the best mylotter.
3 people like this
@Happy2BeMe (99380)
• Canada
6 Nov 19
Oh Dianne..I am so very sorry. So very sad. I know how much you love Doodles. He is your baby. This is so heartbreaking. My heart breaks for you. We have all grown to love him.
3 people like this
@VoiceofTruth7 (1199)
• United States
7 Nov 19
its hard losing a member of the family whether it is in pet form or human form it is always hard I am sorry you all have too go through this all I can say is to remember the good times and that you will be in my thoughts and prayers during this trying time when you release Doodles from there pain and suffering.
3 people like this