Those ads that pop up next to the discussions...and thinking about them...

Tweet

I usually ignore the advertisements that pop up to the right of the discussions and other information that is on the left hand side of the screen. They usually aren't any thing I'm interested in anyhow...who cares if your sofa or pillows stink? Or if you can pay less for your tax prep. I usually close them down if they are closeable. But there is one advertisement that gets my attention everytime.... I'm busily reading through my Notifications or reading the responses when the ad pops up. It sneaks into my sight from the corner of my right eye, with all the bright colors and designs. The designs and heels...the laces and the beauty of the images make me drool. I've been to their site and drooled over their shoes...Yes, shoes. So many beautiful designs with colors emphasizing the artistic workmanship of the people who took the time to carefully design the works of art that would make the women drool. I would dream of walking down the street in the wonderful works of art, in shoes that are as individualistic as I am....except....except for the heels. I can't walk in heels to save my life!!! Fast backward to my 13th birthday. I received a wonderful pair of boots that had 1.5 inch heels on them. I was so proud of my grown up shoes. Especially since we had a new student teacher. He was gorgeous!!! Every girl in my middle school had a flaming crush on him. He was 6 feet tall with auburn hair and eyes the blue of a sky after a winter storm. He had lips that were begging to be kissed and arms that all the girls wanted to have around them. To say he was a hunk was selling him short. The weather was perfect for me to wear my new boots to school. I was very careful about how I walked, after all I was well known for being a klutz...shoot just saying that I was a klutz was being nice!!! Saying I was simply a klutz was like saying a Prima Ballerina was just a dancer. If someone drew a pencil line on the floor I would trip over it!!! I had been held up at my last class and I had just enough time to make it to my class with my student teacher "Hunk". I raced as fast as I dared and just made it to the classroom door as the bell rang. There was the student teacher, at the door as I raced through it. I silently prayed I wouldn't do anything klutzy. My prayers weren't heard. The class was science class, keep that well in mind. I slid past the student teacher, then I really slid!!!! I slid into the demonstration table where he had set up the chemicals for the class that day. I grabbed frantically at the table in hopes that I wouldn't fall or topple the table. Those hopes were dashed immediately. The table toppled over and into the wall sending the chemicals spattering all over the wall and floor. I continued "skiing" across the front of the room and crashing into the teacher's desk. It was a rather substantial desk, but I managed to send it sliding into the bookcase at the end of the room and all the papers were flying through the air like a winter snow storm. My acrobatics weren't done yet. The students in the front desks had enough sense to get up and move as my momentum continued to increase and I continued to destroy the room. I crashed into one of the regular teacher's science projects, destroying it totally and getting most of it all over myself. I bounced off the project, slid on some of the papers, doing some 180 degree twirls, bounced off the end of the table that had been toppled, and landed flat on my face in front of the hunk student teacher, who by then was laughing his head off. I don't blame him, it had to be something out of a Three Stooges Movie for sure. I finally managed to roll over and sit up, science goo dripping from various parts of my body. Mr. Hunk student teacher finally got himself under control and offered his hand to help me up...which I refused to save some face. I tried to walk and found that I had an ankle that was injured...so I limped-well tried to limp- to a chair. As I tried to get to the chair my feet went out from under me and I landed butt first in the waste basket. The student teacher finally composed himself enough to ask if I was hurt...and I had somehow managed to loose my ability to speak so I nodded my head, "YES". He filled out a hall pass and had a friend of mine "help" me to the nurse. We got to the office and the first question when they saw me was "What happened?" Fortunately my friend filled them in for me. The office officials and nurse all went to the break room and laughed like crazy. Finally the nurse came back and checked out my ankle and agreed that it was sprained and called my Mom. Mom came and got me and took me home, and she laughed the whole trip...of course by then I saw the humor in it too. I never wore those boots again! Nor do I ever wear any shoes with heels. I know that sure as anything I'll put on a pair of shoes with heels on them I'll go through a popular pratt falls scene like I did in middle school. As much as I love the shoes that they show in those ads, I don't dare order a pair!!!!