My husband's daughter

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Anyone who has followed my posts knows that my husband's daughter has been rebelling against everyone. She recently got into a car accident which I also talked about and I just hoped that she would learn to let go of some grudges and listen to the people who care most about her. I feel like the stability in the house went when her stepdad left. I also feel like he was the glue to that family and the only one that seemed to care about the kids wellbeing. My husband's ex is something else. I honestly believe she lied during their divorce to make it so my husband wouldn't be able to be present in the kids lives because her soon to be now ex husband wanted to be a dad since he wasn't able to be there for his oldest kids so it was easier to make sure my husband didn't get to be there. She moved and didn't tell him and I read through the papers she made sure he wouldn't get to see them. My husband could have tried harder and he gave up because he figured they were better off without him because he knew he had issues. Her soon to be ex just moved three to four hours away and she let him have their kids together and then changed her relationship status to in a relationship and keeps posting things about long-distance relationships making me think she has an online boyfriend. She seems to be letting my husband's daughter do whatever she wants and when her soon to be ex tried to set rules it's like their daughter rebelled against them all the more and started to hate her stepdad. I really admire him for being there. My husband is grateful to him because he knows how his ex can be. Today I saw a picture of her with him where he lives now and I was happy to see it. I know she was angry with him. It's easy to hate the parent who is actually being a parent. It's like her mom has turned into a teenager. My husband didn't put up much of a fight because he thought those kids would be better off and now he finds out that they may have had it better if he were there. You can't change or erase time all you can do is move forward. His ex has those kids believing lies. My husband has never told his side of the story because he doesn't want to talk down about the parent that was there and because he doubts they'd believe him anyway. They needed more structure than they got. Her ex seems much happier with his new girlfriend. I'm glad to see he is still present in my husband's kids lives and still considers them his own. I feel like he was the actual parental figure there. I have never agreed with the stuff my stepdaughter has posted on FB but it's not my place to say anything. She was always posting sexy pictures and had a bunch of old guys she had no clue who they were commenting and we are in an area where sex trafficking happens regularly. She was always posting about drugs and alcohol. I don't get why her mom never monitors her FB account. I am no longer a friend of hers and honestly, in some ways it's a relief because ignorance really can be bliss. I know she probably hates me but I don't care. I told her stepdad what was going on because she was trying to ruin her whole life. When I asked if she had her mom blocked from the post he said just the particular one about wanting to get pregnant so apparently she knows about the drugs and alcohol and doesn't care. That poor kid is going to grow up with a ton of emotional damage probably partially due to my husband's absence and partially due to her mother's inability to parent. Her stepdad stepped up and was a parent and my husband said he is glad she had him because my husband knows back then he probably wouldn't have been the best parent but he also knows his ex wouldn't have been a great parent on her own either. He often wonders if she would have been better had he been there or if she really was better off without him. Two emotionally damaged people had kids and the outcome is what they got. My husband and his ex both dealt with poor parenting and abuse growing up and they had kids young and I feel like that plays a large part in it. When we had our son together I have had to help teach him be a parent. It's easier if people like them get with someone who had a more stable childhood and being together it was clearly chaos. I have my own set of issues but I had a decent childhood and had parents who had their faults like all parents but who loved us and didn't abuse us or constantly yell at us. I think his ex is now trying to relive her younger years even though she still has kids. She claims to be a Chrisitan who seems to lack all Christian values. I always figured those kids had a much stricter upbringing than the one we gave my son by the way my husband talked about their beliefs and turns out my son has a lot more rules than they did. I don't know how my son will turn out but I do know I'm doing my best to give him rules and boundaries. I always pray for those kids. I hope that this car accident has woken up my stepdaughter about how short life is and that she needs to get her act together. She is no longer that sweet girl I met a few years back who had her life on track. I hope she finds that girl again. She deserves a good life. I hope she grows up to be an amazing woman. She can hate me and her dad all she wants but I hope she continues to let her stepdad in.