Why I am a sad Horse

@TheHorse (220478)
Walnut Creek, California
August 20, 2020 4:11pm CST
Horse Jr.'s mom has decided she cannot live in California, where we are "forced" to wear masks, live with a Democratic Governor, and defer to Covid-19. She has accepted a position in North Carolina, where she feels that she will be more comfortable, as it is a "conservative" state. What this means is that I will lose Horse Jr., just as he enters the vulnerable age of puberty. She has asked me to get set up with Skype, so her child and I can talk often. At least she knows that I have been a good influence on him, in spite of my Moderate (formerly Liberal) tendencies. She will work for half of what she makes here, but the rent will be one third of what she pays here, so she will benefit in the end. Do you think a Croatian woman with an 11-year-old child will fare better in North Carolina than in California? Or will it be "a wash"?
32 people like this
34 responses
@JudyEv (342336)
• Rockingham, Australia
21 Aug 20
I'm sorry to hear this. I'm sure Horse Jr. is gutted as I'm sure you are. I hope the family do well in North Carolina. When do they expect to leave?
3 people like this
@TheHorse (220478)
• Walnut Creek, California
21 Aug 20
They're leaving in about ten days. Yeah, I'm going to be sad puppy.
1 person likes this
@TheHorse (220478)
• Walnut Creek, California
25 Aug 20
@JudyEv We're negotiating which cars I get to keep.
1 person likes this
@JudyEv (342336)
• Rockingham, Australia
22 Aug 20
@TheHorse Oh gosh, that's not far away. You need to get your toys sorted. Give him his back and make sure you have yours.
1 person likes this
@much2say (56226)
• Los Angeles, California
20 Aug 20
Oh I am sad too. You and Horse Jr have such a good relationship . . . you are so good for him and I think he is good for you. I really wish she wouldn't move, but well, I guess that is her decision in hopes to have a better life. Even though it is expensive here, CA is all I know - and I am actually glad to be in this state at this time.
2 people like this
@TheHorse (220478)
• Walnut Creek, California
21 Aug 20
I'm happy here, and have had a good career as a psychology professor and clinician, working with difficult kids.
1 person likes this
@much2say (56226)
• Los Angeles, California
21 Aug 20
@TheHorse You've done well for yourself here. But I guess others have not. It's a love/hate kind of thing for some to be in CA. But geez, I can't imagine moving right now .
2 people like this
@TheHorse (220478)
• Walnut Creek, California
22 Aug 20
@much2say This WOULD be an odd time to move.
1 person likes this
@marguicha (223896)
• Chile
20 Aug 20
How long has she lived in California? I have the idea that California accepts people from other places better than North Carolina. But maybe I am wrong.
2 people like this
@Lolaze (5093)
• St. Louis, Missouri
21 Aug 20
Hopefully she will find happiness on the east coast. And hopefully he will be happy there as well. It’s so good you plan to keep in touch.
2 people like this
@TheHorse (220478)
• Walnut Creek, California
21 Aug 20
Yeppers, I've known the kid since he was three.
@LadyDuck (472160)
• Switzerland
21 Aug 20
If it's true that North Caroline is a more a "conservative" state, I do not see how a "foreigner" will fare well there.
1 person likes this
@TheHorse (220478)
• Walnut Creek, California
21 Aug 20
I find it paradoxical that many foreigners I meet here become "Conservative" once they're Americans.
1 person likes this
@thelme55 (77162)
• Germany
21 Aug 20
That is indeed sad but you can still skype or video chat with your son through WhatsApp or Messenger. You can also see each other in his school vacation.
1 person likes this
@TheHorse (220478)
• Walnut Creek, California
21 Aug 20
I'll have to figure out how Skype works. I've never used it.
1 person likes this
@TheHorse (220478)
• Walnut Creek, California
23 Aug 20
@thelme55 I'll talk to my more tech-savvy friends about all of the above.
1 person likes this
@thelme55 (77162)
• Germany
23 Aug 20
@TheHorse I see. I think WhatsApp and Messenger are easier to use.
1 person likes this
@GardenGerty (161010)
• United States
21 Aug 20
If I was leaving California it would be for different reasons. I think being so shut down for so long has made us all restless and cranky. I hope the move is good for them.
1 person likes this
@TheHorse (220478)
• Walnut Creek, California
21 Aug 20
I'm with you on the restless and cranky thought. I hope it works out for them as well.
@id_peace (14005)
• Singapore
21 Aug 20
I do not know and I cannot judge. I can only hope that you would still be able to spend time with him.
1 person likes this
@DaddyEvil (137802)
• United States
22 Aug 20
Uhm... I started to ask if she was crazy but then remembered who we're talking about. (I'm sorry you may be losing Horse Jr.) You might consider showing her the information on this page, though. Just because the governor hasn't put a law in place for face masks in public yet doesn't mean she won't be required to wear one everywhere she goes, though. Especially at her job, in stores and in schools...
https://www.northcarolinahealthnews.org/2020/06/24/coronavirus-today-june-24/
@wolfgirl569 (108479)
• Marion, Ohio
21 Aug 20
I think that is the wrong reason to move but hope everything works out for her. I did a quick search and she may be disappointed there. This link says masks are required. Very happy that she wants you to skype with him at least.
https://www.nc.gov/covid-19/staying-ahead-curve
1 person likes this
@TheHorse (220478)
• Walnut Creek, California
21 Aug 20
Thanks for the information! I will not mention it to her.
1 person likes this
@Shiva49 (26789)
• Singapore
21 Aug 20
This makes me recall the crying baby photo that you had used earlier a couple of times. He would also be emotionally impacted despite the years gone by. It is tough on everyone as I had also let go my son to be on his own away in another country for studies and job. With technology coming to our aid to fill the void, things should work out in the end - siva
1 person likes this
@TheHorse (220478)
• Walnut Creek, California
21 Aug 20
I hope we get a good pattern going as far as staying in touch goes. His mommy wants me to buy a camera and get set up for Skype. I suppose I could do that.
1 person likes this
@NJChicaa (120245)
• United States
20 Aug 20
I think she should stay where she is
1 person likes this
@LindaOHio (182341)
• United States
21 Aug 20
I'm so sorry to hear that Horse Jr. will be moving away. You will be able to Skype often with him and maybe go and visit. I guess she has to do what makes her feel comfortable. Have a wonderful Friday. Great pic.
1 person likes this
@TheHorse (220478)
• Walnut Creek, California
21 Aug 20
She has already invited me to come visit. Yeppers, I love it when he comes over, plops down on my bed, and I help him with his homework. He loves math and science, but sometimes gets "writer's block" when he has a written assignment. I just get him to talk, and then say "write that down!"
1 person likes this
@LindaOHio (182341)
• United States
22 Aug 20
@TheHorse You are so good with children.
@CarolDM (203422)
• Nashville, Tennessee
20 Aug 20
I really hope this works out for all of you, eventually. I can understand why you are sad.
21 Aug 20
I understand that you are very sad horse, I hope not prolonged and be happy back againt
• United States
21 Aug 20
I know this is tough on you, but thank God for technology, we have Skype and so constant communication is really great. I hope that you would also consider sending him cards with photos of you two together. When you come and visit, spend as much time with him as you can and take new photos. Things will get better, I know that in my heart :-) Have a good weekend. Still, stay safe.
@cherriefic (10399)
• Philippines
21 Aug 20
Not sure about it but maybe she can deal with it somehow.
@simone10 (54187)
• Louisville, Kentucky
22 Aug 20
How sad for both you and Horse Jr. He has to be devastated. I hope all goes well for them.
@gr8nana6 (6614)
• Conyers, Georgia
21 Aug 20
I am so sorry to hear this news and I know it will be hard on you and Horse Jr. All the best to everyone.
@Spontaneo (14700)
• United States
21 Aug 20
How does Horse, Jr. feel about this?
• Semarang, Indonesia
21 Aug 20
wish all the best for her!