A Dream I Dreamed ... Signs of (a kind of) Homophobia?
@mythociate (21432)
Oklahoma City, Oklahoma
October 10, 2020 12:41pm CST
I had a dream. I was in church, and a friend stood up to announce that his-&-his-husband's wedding anniversary. The congregation applauded or something; but I felt the urge to walk out of the chapel as fast as I could--even though I was barefoot--to make sure nobody thought that I was 'the husband' (even tho I'm pretty sure 'the husband' was there with him anyway).
I guess that's what homophobia is (my version of it, anyway; if that's not 'what the usual version is'): the fear that--if you're a man not married (to a woman) and are spending time with a male friend--people will think you're gay.
Maybe 'that kind of homophobia' is the reason behind a lot of bad marriages---men marrying women because they don't want people to think they're gay (and not because they feel anything for the women themselves.)
2 people like this
3 responses
@arunima25 (87770)
• Bangalore, India
10 Oct 20
People should not marry to show or prove something. While you ruin your own life, you ruin the life of other person in the relationship too.
1 person likes this
@mythociate (21432)
• Oklahoma City, Oklahoma
11 Oct 20
True, but a little bit off-topic.
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@arunima25 (87770)
• Bangalore, India
11 Oct 20
@mythociate I wanted to say people should accept if they are gay and not feel guilty about it. And also society should be accepting gay people and their relationship. One should not be in a relationship due to societal pressure.
1 person likes this
@mythociate (21432)
• Oklahoma City, Oklahoma
12 Oct 20
@arunima25 That's nice ... but it doesn't have anything to do with me 
It's like 'if people thought that I were African-American' .... there's nothing wrong with BEING African-American, but I don't want to claim to be one if I'm not!
It's like 'if people thought that I were African-American' .... there's nothing wrong with BEING African-American, but I don't want to claim to be one if I'm not!1 person likes this
@eileenleyva (27560)
• Philippines
10 Oct 20
Studies show that dreams are manifestations of the subconscious.
Yup, there is a fear called homophobia. But real men should not have such a fear.
The gay people should be accepted. It is through no fault of their own that they are gay.
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@eileenleyva (27560)
• Philippines
14 Oct 20
@mythociate Thanks for that information. First time I've heard of it.
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@mythociate (21432)
• Oklahoma City, Oklahoma
11 Oct 20
Actually, the fear I described is ... a professional on PsychForums describes it as "a form of HOCD" (obsessive worry about whether one is gay or straight).
'Homophobia' is something more like 'racism against people-with-that-lifestyle.'
https://www.psychforums.com/obsessive-compulsive/topic166052.html
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@mythociate (21432)
• Oklahoma City, Oklahoma
18 Oct 20
@eileenleyva hmm ... problems seem more managable when we can give them individual names ... "little boxes"---something Brainy says to Lena Luthor in SUPERGIRL
@Namelesss (3365)
• United States
10 Oct 20
Dreams are amazing at making us ask ourselves the questions we might ignore otherwise. Anyone who cares what another person's preference is is a bit overly concerned.
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@mythociate (21432)
• Oklahoma City, Oklahoma
11 Oct 20
So why do men "ask" women to get married? They ought to 'professionally observe' (i.e. maybe 'have a matchmaker arrange the match-up') that "she" goes with "him," and kidnap her & take her to the Chapel of Love; yeah? 
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